Tag Archives: Regret

Shoulda Woulda

20 Nov

There are all kinds of people in the world and they all have their own ideas about life and how things should go. Some people are very confident and sure they have a lot, if not all, the answers. If they think they know us better than we know ourselves (impossible) they may try to tell us what they believe we should be doing. While they may have good suggestions, and we may choose to take their advice, nobody can possibly know what we want better than we do. Telling us we “should” do something because they think it’s a good idea doesn’t mean it’s what’s best for us. While it’s possible and likely we’ll make some mistakes in judgement, we are the experts in our own lives. We already know what we want and where we want to go. We can listen to any suggestions that are offered and weigh each individually, and then do exactly what we want. There is no one perfect way to live life. The expressions and choices are limitless. We can take any road we like and accomplish any goal we desire. We don’t have to fit into anyone else’s model or idea of what is right. Our choices are ours to make and we can design our lives any way we choose. We may occasionally have some regrets over choices we’ve made and think we could have chosen better, but each experience teaches us more about ourselves and the world around us. All the knowledge we gain enriches our understanding and helps us move forward in the future. We don’t need anyone else telling us we “shoulda” done something differently. If they do, we can listen politely, and then continue on toward whatever we are seeking. Every single possibility is there for us and we can do anything. With confidence and focus, we can achieve the goals we want the most, and make our dreams come true.

Our relationships are important and if we’re in a situation where someone we value strongly disagrees with a choice we’re making, they may talk us right out of it. If we decide they have a better choice, we can certainly make it. However, we don’t need anyone’s permission to do anything. We’re in control of our lives and can make our own choices. Going against the flow doesn’t mean we’re going the wrong way. Every destination is there for us, and we can achieve anything we desire.

Nobody is perfect and we all stumble from time to time. If someone warns us not to make a decision and we make it anyway only to face failure, they may say “I told you so,” and they might be right. But just because someone saw something we didn’t notice in one instance, doesn’t mean they will always know what’s best for us. We are intelligent and will learn much from mistakes along the way. We can trust ourselves to choose wisely, and reach every success.

Today if you’re being pressured to go in a direction you haven’t chosen, think about all the options before you. You are wise and capable, and can make excellent choices. Decide what you want the most and step forward with confidence. Every goal is possible, and you can make all your dreams reality.

Cringe Worthy

29 Jan

Life is long and takes us to many different places, teaching us many new things. We don’t ever know everything, and each experience gives us more information than we had before. We learn as we go, and take all the knowledge we gain forward with us. When we look back, sometimes we may have a memory of something we did that turned out to be a mistake. There is no way to appropriately judge what we did before by the knowledge we posses now, but looking behind we may be critical of a prior decision. Perhaps the decision was so bad, that seeing it now, we cringe to believe we thought it was the best way forward. However, back then, it’s likely we made the decision based on all the information we had at the time, which will never be the same as all the information we have now. Life is cumulative, and we gain more with each step we take. There is no way to change the past, and trying to dissect why we did something before will never alter what’s happened. We are where we are now. What’s done is done. We can trust that whatever we did before taught us something of value. We may be wiser now than we’ve ever been, but chances are we’ll be even smarter in the future. Every step gives us more knowledge, and our intelligence increases as we experience new things. There is nothing to be gained by criticizing decisions made in the past. We can see them for what they are, understand where they took us and what they brought into our lives, good or bad, and proceed ahead with confidence. We can see what’s before us, and make decisions that will take us where we most want to go. We are intelligent and capable, and know what we want. Every goal is within our reach, and we can find our way forward.

We are all the sum total or our experiences, and if we’ve had serious disappointments and our plans haven’t worked out, we may begin to believe we will never succeed. Nobody wins in every fight. Sometimes we aren’t going to prevail, but that doesn’t mean we can’t achieve our goals. We are strong and resilient, and failure is just a way of getting more information. Every goal is possible, and with determination and focus, we can go anywhere, and do anything.

On a road trip, if we take a wrong turn and end up going the wrong way, we can stop and change direction. We never have to continue going in the opposite direction simply because we made a mistake. The same is true in our personal lives. Nothing is forever, and everything can be altered. If we don’t like where we’re headed, we can turn around. If the road we’re on turns out to be going somewhere we don’t want to go, we can step off and choose another. We’re in control of our lives and can change them anytime we desire. Every goal is possible and nothing can keep us from success.

Today if you have regrets over something that happened in the past and it’s affecting your choices moving forward, take control and decide how you want to proceed. The past does not dictate your future. You know what you want, and have everything you need to achieve it. All your dreams are possible, and nothing is out of reach. Be confident. You are wise and strong, and will succeed.

Vengeance

11 Feb

People make all kinds of decisions, both good and bad. We can do anything we want to do, and if we’re only thinking about ourselves, may make decisions that work against us. If someone hurts us and we’re angry, we might purposely do something to hurt them in return. We may lie about them and try to turn others against them to bring them pain and make them pay. Revenge can seem fair when we’re determined to settle a score, but never makes things better and can escalate an already difficult situation. We may be successful in hurting the other party and we might achieve whatever negative objectives we’re after, but the cost will be high. Hurting someone else is easy, being mean is easy, and getting revenge may feel good at first but in the end, we may lose more than we imagined. The truth of every situation will eventually be revealed and if we’ve been spiteful and conniving, or have lied or besmirched someone’s reputation unfairly, we will be found out. There is no virtue or nobility in revenge. In the end, we may lose the trust of those around us, and will only gain heartache and a loss of self-respect. Pain happens to all of us and sometimes we may be judged unfairly, or ridiculed, or we may lose something we value. Allowing anger to determine our next steps will only bring us failure and disappointment. Instead of seeking revenge, we can step back and look at everything objectively and clearly. We can decide to move forward with integrity and courage, and choose the most successful road ahead. We are defined by our actions. Making sure they represent the best of who we are will take us where we most want to go.

Time is always moving forward and there is no way to go back and change something in our past. Once we do something, even if we regret it later, it remains forever. Nothing can change it and we must live with it going forward. We all want to make good decisions but everyone makes mistakes. If we’re angry or upset, we may falter and choose something negative that brings us shame. If we’ve chosen badly, we can accept what’s happened, do what’s needed to amend any pain we’ve caused, correct our course, and continue forward.

Nothing is ever gained by hurting others. We may feel justified or vindicated if we make someone who has offended us suffer, but that is a mirage. We gain nothing through revenge. Whatever victory we believe we’ve achieved will be hallow when we realize we’ve traded our nobility to get even. We are worth more than we realize. We can hold onto to our values and choose the right when things go wrong. Every blessing is possible and by choosing wisely, even when we’re in pain, we’ll reach every destination we desire.

Today if someone has offended you and you are determined to make them pay, remember your standards are more important than revenge. Step up and move forward with integrity and honesty. You are a great blessing to the world and when you choose wisely, we all benefit. You can reach any destination you desire. Keep your eyes focused ahead, and nothing will keep you from success.

Shields Up

7 Feb

When we’re trying hard to accomplish a difficult task and face complications, we can press forward with determination and courage. If the odds are against us and we have little support from those around us, continuing the struggle alone may make the trial harder. But if we really believe in what we’re trying to accomplish and are unrelenting in our pursuit, we can continue on no matter what challenges we must face. A shield is anything that protects us. There are physical shields we can use to be safe but we also have personal shields inside us that give us courage and help us move forward confidently. They include our determination, our stamina, our unwavering dedication and our willingness to try. We can hold our invisible shields in front of us and press forward when we’re facing difficult challenges. They are endless and strong, and with their constant availability we can accomplish almost anything. But we must be diligent to keep our shields up against the barriers in our way. If we let them fall and lose our confidence the chances of success will diminish. We have everything we need to find success and we can navigate anything before us and manage it well. We can use our shields to help us along and be confident we can succeed.

There is nothing we can’t try and if we are determined to win it will always be too early to quit. We can stay the course and continue for as long as we choose. If we get stuck, we can stop for a time, regroup and rethink our plans forward and then begin again. Some things take a long time to accomplish but if we’re dedicated to making them happen we can keep moving forward. If we quit, we are destined to fail. There is no way to win if we stop trying. If the challenge becomes too great, we can pause for now and wait until things change. Success if often about timing. What we want to do may not be possible right now but life is always changing and our circumstances change as well. What didn’t work before may work later. Setting a goal aside doesn’t mean we’ve forsaken it. We can take a break and let things roll forward without us and then return to our objective later.

Our regrets often reflect what we didn’t try. Our willingness to try for all our dreams is what brings us happiness. Some things won’t work no matter what we do, and some things will come easily. There is no way to know what we can accomplish until we put ourselves out there and give it our best. We can often do far more than we think we can. We have unlimited personal resources. We have the confidence we need, our shields to help us go forward, and our desires to lead the way. There really isn’t anything we can’t do. The world is there for those who take it. We can make our dreams come true, accomplish the seemingly impossible and find great success. It’s all there for us.

Today if you’ve been pushing hard to make something happen and you feel overwhelmed by the struggle, keep your shields up. Take another step forward. You have all the wisdom and strength you need to win. You are invincible. There isn’t anything you can’t do. Keep moving forward. Success is just ahead.

Our Gift

14 Sep

“The past is your lesson.  The present is your gift.  The future is your motivation.”  Unknown

While we’re navigating our lives and doing everything we need to accomplish we often think about our futures.  Where are we going?  What do we want to do?  How will get there?  There are questions to explore, ideas to formulate, and plans to make.  If we’re highly ambitious we may spend a lot of time planning for what lies ahead.  There is nothing wrong with making plans for the future and everyone has dreams they hope to accomplish.  But the real gift in our lives is our present.  What’s happening right now is the most important thing in our lives.  The past is behind us and we can take all the lessons we’ve learned from our previous experiences forward with us but we can’t go back.  The future lies ahead and although we may try to plan for it, nobody really knows what it will bring.  Today is the most important day of our lives.  What we’re doing right now is the only thing we have any control over.  What we’re doing, how we’re living, and what we’re learning today is the gift that helps us move forward.  We may forget how important today is if we’re heavily invested in plans for tomorrow, or grieving over something that has passed.  But today, right now, is the most precious gift we have.  If we pay attention and apply ourselves to this moment we will gain as much as possible from our experience.  Without today there would be no tomorrow.  We can honor our lives today and grab hold of everything it has to offer.

When we’re busy and have a lot to get done our time flies by.  The hours seem like minutes and before we know it the day is gone.  If we’ve rushed through it we may have missed some of the blessings available to us as we hurry to the next item on the list.  We may not even see those who pass us or hear others say hello.  Having a singular focus is helpful when there is a lot to get done.  But if we look up and pay attention as our lives rush by we will have a richer experience and deepen our connections to those around us.  It doesn’t take long to acknowledge someone and say hello, or offer a smile as we walk by.  If we take our eyes off ourselves for a moment and interact with others our days will be augmented and enhanced.  This day will be gone quickly and there is nothing we can do to get it back.  Seeing it as a gift and opening ourselves up to receiving all its blessings will bring us happiness and contentment.

They say when we’re dying we don’t regret the things we did, but the things we didn’t do.  If we knew today was our last day on earth, how would we change things?  Who would we see, and what would we do?  This may not be our last day here but if we lived our lives as though it were, how different would it look?  Would we take more time for those we love?  Would we pay more attention to those around us?  Would we offer more care and compassion?  We can change anything about how we’re living our lives at any time.  We can make each day a priority.  This life is precious.  Living each day to the fullest will bring us the most satisfaction.

Today if you’ve been rushing around to get things done, remember what a gift today is.  It’s just for you.  This is the best day of your life because it’s the only day you have.  Live everything to the fullest today.  This is your most precious gift.