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Tag Archives: Strong

Broken or Blessed

4 Aug

Relationships are important to all of us.  When we have a healthy and strong network of family and friends around us we feel supported and cared for.  Relationships come in all varieties and when they are good for us they are blessings in our lives.  But sometimes we may develop a relationship with someone who doesn’t have our best interests at heart.  Perhaps they are dysfunctional in their own lives and use us to fill in the gaps and missing pieces they experience within themselves.  Or maybe they see us as a stepping stone to something better.  Sometimes they may manipulate us into believing they care for us when they don’t or convince us to trust them in ways that work against us.  If they need more than we’re comfortable giving or have problems that interfere with our happiness it will be impossible for us to continue.  We don’t have to end any relationship that is important to us but if it’s hurting us we can find ways to manage it that ensure we’re comfortable and safe.  If a relationship is too difficult it may break and we may have to walk away.  Our personal happiness and safety are important and if we’re in a relationship that hurts us or makes us feel unsure we can change our involvement.  There are all kinds of people in the world and some need more than we can give.  We don’t have to continue in any situation that doesn’t work.  We can choose a new path at any time and are in complete control of our lives.  We know ourselves and know what is best for us.  Taking control and choosing the best road forward will bring us happiness and peace.

Perception is reality and sometimes our perception of an issue may be different than someone else’s.  What is acceptable and appropriate for one person may be offensive and unwelcome to another.  If we develop a relationship with someone whose ideas about what is right differ from ours, there will likely be conflict.  It may be possible to find a compromise but if the differences are extreme and feelings are strong it may become unworkable.  If we’re involved with someone whose personal values are far different than ours we may need to step back.  We deserve to be happy and choose to live our lives according to our personal standards.  We need not compromise what is most important to us.

There are few things more rewarding than a loving relationship with someone who respects us and treats us with kindness.  We feel strong when we’re with them and confident going forward knowing they have our backs and we can count on them for support.  Sharing our lives with someone who understands us and cares for us is a great blessing.  We can have any kind of relationships we desire.  We know what we want and what we need, and if we choose well we will be happy.

Today if you’re struggling with a relationship that brings you pain and frustration, consider all your options going forward.  You are in control of your life and you deserve every happiness.  Make choices today that will bring you comfort and joy.  You know what you need and you know what to do.  Be confident.  You have everything you need to have the life you desire.

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Star of the Show

13 Feb

When we’re watching movies, there are often a lot of people on the screen and many things going on. There is a lot of sensory stimulation with the music, the script, and scene movement. If it’s an action movie it can be hard to catch everything that’s happening. But no matter what’s going on or how many different characters there are, our attention is focused on the star of the show. There is always one main character who carries the story. Our lives aren’t movies but there are lots of things going on all the time and many people coming and going every minute, and we are the star of the show. We are the most important person even when we’re focused on others and what we’re going through is captivating. We can be selfless and help those around us and address all the scenarios and situations that come, but in the end if we aren’t taking care of ourselves we won’t be as effective as we could be. The first person who needs our attention is us. If we don’t meet our personal needs, we won’t be able to care for anyone else. Most of us will not get “star treatment” from others as we go through our lives, but we can give it to ourselves and make sure we have everything we need to be healthy and strong. We are the stars of our own lives, and we deserve to take the best care of ourselves we possibly can. If we do, we will have all the strength and wisdom we need to help others and be an asset to the world around us.

When we fly on planes and go through the safety drill before the flight, the flight attendants always explain that if oxygen is needed, we must put our masks on first and then help those around us. We must make sure we are able to help by taking care of our needs first. That’s true in our personal lives as well. No matter what we’re going through or what trials we’re facing, we need to figuratively make sure our masks are securely fastened and we’re getting the oxygen we need before we attempt to assist those around us. We must be first on our list to ensure we have everything we need before we extend ourselves.

It is noble and valiant to serve others. It’s good to sacrifice our time to help when we’re asked and be available to those who need us. Living a life focused solely on our own personal needs and wants and discounting those around us will not bring us long term satisfaction or happiness. There is much gratification to be gained by extending ourselves and being helpful. But helping others requires personal strength and courage. We must build up our own personal energy before we can share it. We can be kind and helpful and still take the time we need to care for ourselves. We are the most important person in our lives and when we remember to give ourselves everything we need first, we will have enough to serve others.

Today if you’ve been neglecting what you need to be strong and happy, take some time for yourself. You deserve the very best of everything and you can get it. Remember how important you are. We all need you in our lives and want what’s best for you. Give that to yourself today and you’ll find happiness and peace and have the strength you need.

Hedge Fund

16 Jan

When we want something very badly and we aren’t sure we can accomplish it, we may hedge our bet to try to increase our odds. For instance, if we’re dating someone we like but aren’t sure the relationship will go anywhere, we may decide to date someone else on the side. That way, if one situation ends, we’ll have the other to fall back on. Or if we want someone to believe in us but know we can’t give them what they need, we may fabricate stories about our plans and pretend to do things in ways that will bring them closer. We may think if we can get them on board we’ll figure out how to keep them there later. Hedging our bet is a way to negate any loss that may come. In some arenas, it’s not a bad idea, but when interacting with others, it can be dangerous. Working behind the scenes may work against us. If those involved discover what we’re doing, we may lose everything. Nobody appreciates dishonesty and if our subterfuge is uncovered, the goal we’re seeking may be lost. Forever. When we want something, the best choice is to honestly and openly express our desire for it, and then do what is needed to achieve it. There isn’t anything we can’t do and we can gain whatever we’re seeking with honor. We don’t need to hedge our bet to win. We can win by doing our best.

The world is filled with all kinds of ideas. There are many ways to accomplish anything and if we choose to manipulate a situation, our options increase. If we aren’t sure we can get to our goal, we may choose to creatively shape our actions and frame our ideas in ways that make them seem more attractive. There is nothing wrong with enhancing our approach to make it more successful, but if we do it using trickery or pretense, we may get to the goal but our success may be precarious. Truth always rises and once all the facts are uncovered we may lose in the end. It does no good to gain something that slips through our fingers once our deceptive methods have been uncovered.

There are times when we may be unsure we can accomplish what we we’re seeking. We may think we don’t have the tools needed to get there or others involved will not receive us. We can talk ourselves out of any goal if our desire to achieve it isn’t strong enough. But there really isn’t anything we can’t accomplish. We have everything we need to succeed and even if we aren’t sure, we can go forward step by step and get to the goal. Manipulation, deceit, duplicity and trickery are tools for the weak. We are strong enough to move forward being honest and clear in our objective and we will succeed. We don’t need to hedge our bets. We have everything we need already.

Today if you’re thinking of manipulating a situation to get what you want, remember your integrity. You already have everything you need to succeed and you can win by being honest and sincere. There isn’t anything you can’t accomplish. Be the best you can be today and make your decisions based on the high standards you cherish. You are a gift to the world. Set the example for good and choose well.

Seeking Greatness

29 Dec

We can be any kind of people we choose to be. It doesn’t matter what circumstance we are born into, whether wealthy or poor, we can decide what kind of person we want to be. We can be lazy and do the least amount necessary to get through our days, we can be industrious and try hard to excel, or we may land somewhere in the middle. When it comes to our personal choices we are in charge. In most situations, the old adage that someone else made us do something isn’t real. Influences are all around us and if we choose to fall prey to them instead of choosing what we know is best for us, we are responsible for that decision. If we want to be great, noble people, we can be. We can change lives by setting a good example, and we can change our world by choosing what is right.

The question of right or wrong always comes into play when we think about our choices. How we define those two parameters will determine how we go forward. For some of us, lying and cheating are an acceptable means to an end. But if we want to be great, honesty must be adhered to no matter what. There is no such thing as being too honest. Honesty is an all or nothing deal. We either are or we aren’t honest. If we think it’s a part-time situation, and we are only honest when it benefits us, we are actually dishonest in every way. The values we determine to live by and the standards we set for our lives determine the type of people we become. And who we are is reflected in what we do. It doesn’t matter what we say we’ll do or who we say we are. The truth is who we are is what we actually do. Living our lives means just that – living them. How we choose to do that determines what kind of character we become.

It’s never too late to change our course if we feel we’re on the wrong road, or headed down a path that will not take us where we most want to go. We can stop at any time and reset our direction. If we’ve become affiliated with others who are making choices we don’t want to make, we can distance ourselves from them. If we’ve done things we now regret, we can begin to do what is needed to repair the situation. There is nothing permanent in this life. Everything is fluid and ever changing. We will rarely be in a situation that is cast in stone and unchangeable. But changing it requires that we change first. If we take a good look at our lives and our decisions, we can decide how to go forward. Sometimes we need only make small adjustments, and sometimes we have to change many things, but we are capable of doing whatever is needed. We can be more than just good people. We can be great people by making strong, noble decisions and choosing the right in every instance every day. It takes practice but if we are diligent, we can become the very best versions of ourselves as possible. And that is what will change the world for the better. We have a lot of power to lead the way, and we can share it with those around us.

Today if you don’t feel you’ve been doing your best and you want to be great, start by making better decisions. Think clearly about where you want to be and then choose the paths that will take you there. There is greatness in you. Re-chart your course and show everyone the very best you have. You have the power to be an amazing influence for good. Use that power today and change the world for the better.

What Lies Within

15 Dec

As we go through our lives we experience many things. Some are good, some are joyful, some are sad, and some may be destructive. We are an accumulation of all the experiences we have, good or bad, and they color our behavior and perspectives going forward. Emerson said, “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” This is a true statement. Although the experiences we’ve already had certainly affect who we are, and the experiences yet to come will impact us in some way, they are never more powerful than who we are inside. We have everything we need to comprehend and process any experience that comes to us, and we have the courage to overcome any obstacle. We have more strength and nobility inside ourselves than we comprehend and they come forward as we need them. What we carry inside us, the courage and honor we hold, is stronger and more powerful than anything that happens to us. What lies within is us can carry us through anything.

When we have bad experiences, when we are hurt, betrayed, or in any way distressed or offended, although we overcome them in time, we carry the scars with us going forward. Sometimes those scars affect our ability to be happy for a time, or prevent us from trusting others. Sometimes they teach us valuable lessons we can draw on later, and sometimes if they are strong enough, they can be crippling. How we handle them determines how we grow as we continue on. If we forget how strong we are inside, if we believe we cannot handle the disappointment and it will never heal, we could get stuck in misery. It’s important to understand there is nothing we will face that we cannot manage. There is nothing that will overcome us if we trust ourselves and draw on the immense reserves of strength we have inside. We can do anything. We can conquer whatever has happened, no matter how trying or difficult it may be.

Nobody knows what our futures will bring. We all hope for the best and plan for success but sometimes things go awry and we crash and burn. But crashing and burning just means we get to start over on a new road. The old path is gone, the old goal is over, and we can begin again to go forward in a new direction. We never reach the end until death arrives. Until then, we have endless opportunities for success every single day. We have everything we need already there inside us to figure things out. What comes to us is small compared to what we can do. We are powerful and strong, and we are invincible. If we remember that, no matter what we face, we will prevail.

Today remember that what lies within you is great. You are capable, noble, and strong. You have everything you need to go forward with joy and success. There isn’t anything you can’t do. You have more courage and strength inside you than you need. You can do anything. Be brave. You will succeed and you will be happy.

Last Minute

29 Aug

Sometimes when we need to do something we don’t want to, or have to make a decision that’s hard for us, we put it off. We might ignore it for as long as possible, get busy with other things, and pretend it doesn’t exist. But eventually we reach the time when we absolutely, positively have to do it. We’ve waited until the last minute either hoping we wouldn’t have to face it, or hoping somehow running out of time would help us get it done. Lots of us need the pressure of the last minute to make difficult decisions or move forward. When we put things off until we reach the moment when we have to do them even if we’re not ready, it has to happen. And then we face them.

Waiting until the last minute has its perks. We can forget about the situation for a while, we can live in a dream state pretending it doesn’t exist, and we can imagine we’re preparing so we can make the best decision when the time comes. If we’re in denial these seem like good options. But if we want to live in truth, this dodging really doesn’t help us. Waiting until we absolutely have to do something before we face it just makes the decision harder because we’re short on time, and it rushes us through the task that needs to be done, opening the door for problems.

If we want to do our best we need to be more proactive. Being proactive takes thought and planning. No matter what we have to face, it’s best to take the time we need to prepare for the decision or activity, plan for it to happen, and then confidently go forward. There isn’t anything we can’t face, but we’ll face everything more effectively if we look at it head on instead of ignoring it, and pretending it’s not there. If we courageously and carefully think about it, consider our options, and then plan for possible outcomes, we’ll be more successful in accomplishing what we need to. Waiting things out rarely works to our advantage and having an advantage can make all the difference.

Today if you’ve been putting something off that needs your attention, if you’ve been ignoring a decision or situation you need to address, change your focus. Open the door and look at things squarely, evaluate your feelings, and go forward with confidence. There is nothing you can’t do. There is nothing you can’t face. You are strong and capable of doing anything. Today move forward with confidence and get the advantage on your side. You can manage this. You’re just moving one more step closer to where you want to be.

Take It Back

15 Aug

There are times when we may find ourselves in relationships where we’ve lost control over our lives. We didn’t set out to find a relationship that would control us, but one thing leads to another, and suddenly we realize we’ve lost something. We’ve allowed a situation to build on itself to the point that someone else is determining our decisions, and how we live. Often these relationships are painful, and we are hurt. Sometimes because the changes have been subtle and insidious, we don’t realize how hurt we’ve been. But we know we aren’t happy, and something needs to change.

It’s good to believe in others, and put our trust in them unless they show us they are not worthy of that trust. When we are kind and trusting, we can sometimes bend too far and allow someone else to gain too much control. Sometimes it starts by just going along with something we don’t agree with because we love the other person and we want them to be happy. That may change into arguments as we try to be heard, and if the arguments continue over time, we may grow weary, and decide to give in to keep the peace. When that happens, we trade our control for calm. We hand it over to prevent disagreements.

Unhappiness can sneak up on us. If it’s been a gradual decline, and we’ve been unsettled for a while, we may not realize how far we’ve gone. Then something happens that wakes us up. Perhaps a trusted friend reminds us of how happy we used to be. Perhaps we decide enough is enough. Even if we truly value the relationship that’s hurting us, even if we still believe in the promise that things will improve, we will, eventually, have to make a choice. We deserve to be happy. When we are ready, and decide we want more, we will take our lives back. It probably won’t be easy. It may hurt to turn the ship, but we can do it. We are strong, and once we remember who we are, and how strong we are, we will succeed.

Today if you’ve decided to stop hurting, and you are ready to be happy, take your life back. Take it back. You have everything you need to succeed. Don’t listen if someone says you can’t do this. You can. You deserve to be happy. Today turn the ship. You are stronger than you realize. You are worth more than you can imagine. The best of everything is waiting for you.