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Measuring Up

17 Jan

Everything we do tells the world who we are. We’re all individuals with our own ideas about life, and what we should do. There is no one perfect interpretation regarding how life should be accomplished. Everyone gets to decide for themselves and design their lives any way they choose. Most people seem to accept that premise, but some may feel they are wiser and know more about us than we know about ourselves. They may try to instruct us on how we should proceed and tell us what our choices should be. The world is filled with suggestions and promptings to do this, or that, go here or there. We can certainly follow anyone else’s lead if we want to, but nobody can possibly know us better than we know ourselves. Our lives belong to us and we can do anything we desire. We always know what we want the most, and can achieve any goal or destination we like. We decide how our lives will go, and never need measure up to anyone else’s requirements. There will always be unlimited ideas and recommendations, suggestions and instructions. We can listen to all of them, and then choose the path that works best for us. We can always change, but we are amazing and unique, just as we are. The whole world is enhanced because we are here. People may have their standards and choices, and we can respect them, but our lives are our responsibility and we can live them our way. There will never be anyone else like us. The gifts we give, and the contributions we make are exclusive to us. Letting go of who we really are, and changing to fit some norm, would rob the world of our unique offering. We are beneficial to the whole creation exactly as we are.

We are often bombarded with the opinions of others. There are endless messages that we should be more beautiful, taller, thinner, richer, more affluent, etc. Most of these are sales pitches and a lot of them are very successful. We may wish we had some attribute we don’t possess, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t perfect as we are. Trying to measure up to the world’s ideas is pointless and unproductive. When we choose to do our best in every situation, and honor our unique personalities, we will find great happiness and satisfaction.

Accepting and loving ourselves is important. It’s impossible to be completely happy if we don’t think we’re good enough, or don’t like ourselves. Personal criticism can be harsh and unrealistic. We aren’t perfect, and although perfection may be the goal, it’s unlikely we’ll achieve it. We can change anything we like but our idiosyncrasies and personal expressions make us unique. We bring variety and spice to a world that would be bland and boring without us. We are important and valuable, just as we are, and the whole world is enriched because we are here.

Today if you feel like you aren’t good enough for something or someone, remember how precious and unique you are. You are amazing, and more valuable than you can imagine. Be confident. Your spark and light augment and enhance everything, and nobody could ever take your place. We’re all blessed because you are here.

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What We Feel

20 Dec

People come in and out of our lives constantly. We have families, friends, acquaintances and people we simply notice in passing. There are billions of people in the world and each has a unique perspective about what’s going on and where we’re headed. We may be attracted to someone’s ideas, or how they express themselves, and as we interact with them, our feelings for them may grow and increase. We may begin to fall in love and expect the other person is having the same experience. People fall in love all the time, and when those feelings are reciprocated, our connection becomes deeper. It’s wonderful to find someone who loves us and with whom we can share our lives. But sometimes things may go another way. Our tender feelings might be strong but they will not create the same experience in someone else. We may discover we’re on completely different pages. It’s very painful to realize the one we love does not feel the same way about us. If that happens, everything will change. No matter how much we want to be close, if our feelings aren’t returned, we’ll have to chart a different course going forward. There is no way to make someone love us, no matter what we do, or how hard we try. It’s either there, or it isn’t. We are lovable and amazing but if the feelings aren’t there, we’ll have to find a new way to continue. It’s impossible to change anyone but ourselves, and we can decide what’s best moving forward. We deserve to be completely happy, and can decide what works best for us. Unrequited love can be very painful, but we have a lot going for us, and with patience and wisdom, we’ll find the right way ahead. We can do what is needed to find balance, and ensure our happiness.

A one-way love affair will never bring us complete satisfaction. If we’re in a situation where we’re in love by ourselves, we may feel completely devastated, and alone. We can recognize our feelings and honor them, and then create a plan that takes us to a new situation and helps us move toward a new goal. By focusing on our own choices, we will begin to heal and find true happiness. We are intelligent and highly capable of doing anything we desire. We can accept the way things are, and then step forward with confidence.

When we suffer a great loss, we can take the time we need to grieve. Every painful process will be resolved in time, but every experience is different, and there is no way to know how much time that will take. We are strong and wise, and will find our footing again. We have so much potential and by focusing on where we want to go and what we want to do, will create the lives we want the most.

Today if you feel unloved or unappreciated, remember how incredible and valuable you are. You are a gift to the whole world. Your light shines on all of us, and we are blessed because you are here. Every dream you desire is within reach. Decide how you want to proceed, and then step forward with confidence and clarity. There is great happiness ahead, and nothing can keep you from success.

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That Loving Feeling

26 Sep

Human relationships can be very rewarding. Our lives are enhanced and enriched when we have deep, strong connections to others that are positive and uplifting. When we first find someone we’re attracted to and begin to draw close to them, we may be filled with infatuation. It can be a dizzying, delirious feeling that makes us weak in the knees and unable to concentrate. The first rush of love can be quite intense but it cannot last. If we stay close, time and interaction will ripen our feelings to a deeper, more sustaining sense of love. Being in love can be an incredibly positive experience that augments our lives and enhances our senses. But if we want the love to last it must move beyond feelings. We must do things that show how we care, learn how to support one another, and live our lives in ways that include each other. Although we may have very strong and intense feelings about someone else, love itself is a verb that requires action if we want it to last. We can’t focus only on ourselves, and our personal wants and desires, and expect to have a healthy, strong relationship. That means we must be willing to give our time, our energy, and our attention, and meet our partner’s needs with grace and patience. The best relationships in our lives will come when we do everything we can to build them up and make them last. Human bonds that complete our lives and bring us great happiness are precious and rare. It’s extraordinary to find someone we love with whom we want to build a future. It’s more precious than anything else we may experience. By valuing our relationships and treating them with care, doing everything possible to make them strong and vibrant, we will find great happiness.

The things we want in life are ever changing. One year we’re sure we want one thing and the next we’re on to something new. But our needs are a different story. We can change what we want at any time, but our needs are hard-wired into who we are. If we’re in a relationship and we’re sure we’re in love but the other person doesn’t fulfill our basic needs for attention or communication, it’s unlikely it will survive. We’ll have to choose to either continue an unworkable situation or move on. We deserve every happiness and the best relationships possible.

The world is filled with all kinds of people. It’s possible to fall for someone who is narcissistic and selfish. We may overlook the things that are difficult in the beginning, but eventually it will be impossible to ignore bad behavior. We are worth the best relationships possible. We need never surrender to a situation that doesn’t make us happy or bring us a deep fulfilling connection. We can decide what we want, and then do what is needed to make sure we get it.

Today if you’re in a relationship that isn’t making you feel worthwhile and cared for, you can change direction. Every happiness you desire is possible. You are amazing and all your dreams can come true. Care deeply for yourself and choose wisely. There is tremendous happiness waiting, and you will reach it.

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Show Me

13 Sep

There are many different emotions we experience in our lives. One of the most rewarding, frustrating, difficult and pleasurable is love. Love creates strong, sometimes intense connections to those around us and when we share it with someone we may feel complete and happy. Everyone expresses their emotions in different ways. One person may be very affectionate while someone else who feels the same way may be more reserved in what they show. We’re unique and express what we feel according to what’s comfortable for us and how much we’re willing to display. But when we say we love someone, love is a verb. It requires us to do something that shows how we feel. If we do nothing and merely admit our feelings to ourselves alone, or simply express our feelings in words only, it’s likely we’ll never have the relationship we seek. Words are fine for giving directions or explaining how things work, but if we want to express that we love someone, words are only the first step. We must show we love them through our actions, our consideration, our trust, and our commitment. Without actions words mean nothing and we may lose a tender connection we truly desire. By being open and expressing our feelings we can get close to others in ways that will bring us intense joy and satisfaction. We have everything we need to create strong, healthy relationships and show those we love how we feel. When we do, our lives will be enriched and we’ll find great happiness.

It’s impossible to have a close, loving relationship with someone if they don’t know how we feel. It can be difficult to express our tenderest emotions, and we may hesitate not knowing what the response will be. Baring our souls and deepest feelings takes courage and we may need time before we’re ready. We can take all the time we need to express ourselves, but we will never be able to move forward until we do. We can hold our feelings close and keep them to ourselves for as long as we like. But every moment we wait keeps us from the possible happiness we could enjoy.

If we aren’t confident about actually building a real love relationship with someone else, but still want them close, we may say we love them and make promises from a distance without ever letting them near. They may get caught up in our words at first and believe we really care, but if we don’t actually let them into our lives, we will eventually lose them. It’s impossible for anyone to believe we love them over time if we aren’t willing to do anything that shows we care. If we don’t let them in, they will remain on the outside. We’re brave enough to open our hearts to those we love. We can let them share and become part of our lives. The intimacy of letting someone know us deeply will bring tremendous satisfaction and depth into our relationship.

Today if you feel love for someone but have been unable to express it, think about what you really want. You can open your heart and share your life and find great pleasure in the connection. Be open and let others in. Your life will be richer and you’ll be happier. Show your love and you’ll have great blessings and joy.

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Finding Fault

12 Dec

We all make judgments in our lives. We decide what we think is right and wrong, and what is true or false. We base our judgments on our personal paradigms and values, and what we perceive as facts. We make judgments about situations and decisions, but we also include people in those judgments even when we don’t have all the facts. And we never have all the facts when others are involved. Unless we are the ones in the situation we’re judging, chances are good our speculation will be erroneous in some way. Judging and comparing are natural human responses to life. We evaluate each situation before we go forward. But loving one another and having compassion for each other doesn’t involve judging. When we love and care we can do it unconditionally. We can love each another even if we’re very different, even if we don’t understand decisions that have been made, and even if we are annoyed. Love and compassion are the highest emotions we can express, and take precedence over everything else. We can forget that when someone does something hurtful, or stupid, or whatever else we think applies. Love and compassion are higher, and they need to be honored as such.

People make mistakes. Some of us make more than others, and sometimes we falter in a huge way. We impact others with our decisions, and sometimes we hurt them badly. Nobody is perfect, and even if we’re trying hard to do what’s right, we may stumble. Having the unconditional support and love of others around us when we fall is priceless. We already know we’ve screwed up, we already know we were wrong, and we really don’t need someone else pointing it out and reminding us. But everyone does that, we all criticize sometimes when things go wrong, and all it really accomplishes is to make those involved feel worse. If we were more compassionate, if we treated others the way we would like them to treat us in the same situation, it would go a long way toward finding resolution. We could talk about it, listen openly, express our feelings, and then let it go.

What if someone makes a very bad decision that really damages us? What if we’re so angry we feel like we want to crush them? Those situations happen and when they do it’s very difficult to think before we act. But we need to stop and consider what we’ll gain afterward. If we make them feel as bad as they made us feel, where will that take us? Will it make things better or worse? If we take a moment to think about the big picture and where we want to be, if we ponder where we want the relationship to go before we act, we have a better chance of making things better. Some decisions are so egregious they destroy relationships completely. When that happens, anger and outrage will do nothing to help. But if there is a bad decision that isn’t so far reaching and we want to preserve our relationship, we can remember our love and compassion for the other person is higher than our anger and disappointment. We don’t have to condone bad behavior, but adding ours to it won’t solve anything. We can reach higher, and go forward with confidence.

Today if you’ve been judging those around you and making decisions about their behavior, try to see things from a wider perspective. If you love and accept them as they are, your relationships will be stronger and more fulfilling. Show them your heart, share your concern for them and they will draw closer to you. Having close, strong relationships makes our lives better. Enhance yours by building them today.

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