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2 Jun

As we go through our lives, we make many connections and alliances with those around us. We build relationships and friendships, and when they are positive, they embellish our lives and bring us joy and comfort. Each time we connect with someone, we create an anchor of some sort. If the connection is beneficial, it will give us a stronger foundation and help us as we move forward. A personal relationship with someone who brings joy and support is an anchor we can lean on when times get tough. But not all anchors are helpful. If we have a job we don’t like, a personal relationship that isn’t working, a family situation that’s destructive, or any other difficult situation we remain in out of convenience or fear, we may find the anchors we build hold us down and keep us from our goals. Anchors can be very heavy, and we may find ourselves stuck in place, dealing with a situation that isn’t changing and will not help us advance. Our lives belong to us and we never have to stay in any position forever. We can let go of whatever is holding us back, and step forward on a new road that leads to the destinations we desire most. It doesn’t matter what others think or how they want us to proceed. We can do anything we desire. Each day is a blessing and once it’s gone, will never return. We have all the courage and wisdom we need to direct our lives any way we choose. By letting go of whatever is holding us in place, we can purposely choose the best road ahead, and move forward with confidence that we will succeed.

Traditions can be very powerful. When things have been done a certain way for a long time, and we want something else, we may face opposition from those around us. If our family holds onto specific situations and activities, and we want something different, conflict may arise. We never have to live our lives according to someone else’s ideas, and we can manage any complications that come. Our lives are ours to design, and we can let go of anything that keeps us from success. We are powerful and capable, and can do anything we desire. If we trust ourselves, we can be sure we’ll reach every destination we choose.

If someone near us is overwhelmed by a situation and we offer to help, they may try to dump the whole problem on us and walk away. We never have to carry anyone else’s load, or build an anchor that prevents us from moving forward. We can take care of our own lives, and make our own decisions. We know what we want to do and where we want to go. We can set down anything that holds us back, and make excellent decisions that help us move closer to our goals. Success is always there for us, and nothing can keep us from it.

Today if you’re stuck in place because of an anchor that will not let you move, remember you’re in control, and can change anything. Let go of whatever is holding you down, and step forward with confidence. You have so much to offer, and every success is possible. Have courage, and be sure. Success is already there for you. Step forward and claim it.


Filtering Connections

4 Apr

“Well, that face, but with better headlights. You know how hers have kind of dimmed lately? Heidi Klums beams would do. And her teeth. Or, ooh, that Britney Spears girl. She’s got great knockers. But she’s a tad muscular. Uh, actually, you know what? Her ass would do, too, if she had a better grille. Like, uh, Michelle Pfeiffer back when she did “Grease 2”. But she’d have to be a little smilier than Michelle. Kinda like Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, before she got Stamosed. But not as skinny. Someone a little meatier, like Heidi. But without the accent. You know those accents: yah-yah-yah-yah. They really get old fast. You know what I mean. Someone like that.”   Shallow Hal

There are all kinds of people in the world and limitless opportunities for us explore. When we’re open to trying new things, and letting new people into our lives our experiences become broad and far reaching and we learn a lot. Differences are what make us unique and create a depth to our lives that sameness could never offer. If we keep our focus narrow and require that each experience be pre-qualified by a set of parameters we’ve determined, the roads we travel will be narrow and unyielding. Personal restrictions may filter important experiences with others from our lives. Narrowing our scope of opportunity prevents us from having full and rich interactions and our growth forward may be stunted. We may decide what’s comfortable but if we have so many filters that must be met before we can open a door, we may find ourselves locked inside a world that is small and uninspired.

There is nothing wrong with setting high standards for the things we want to do or the people with whom we affiliate. We may decide how we live our lives and who we spend our time with. But differences bring richness and allowing new ideas and situations to come forward helps us understand the world. There are countless interpretations of life and endless ideas and opinions, each offering a new way to see things. If we can reach beyond our pre-determined ideas of what is best and open up to something new our lives will be enriched and our understanding will widen.

We may require countless things to happen before we move forward and each one filters something out we may experience. We can do anything we want to do and being open to new ideas and events will deepen our understanding and enrich our lives. We don’t need pre-requisites and filters for everything. We can let things happen as they will, allow different expressions, and open our eyes to new and diverse ways of seeing things. There is a lot to experience in life. Being receptive to new interpretations gives us the richest and most rewarding return as we navigate forward. There are endless new things to try, people to meet and doors to open. We can be welcoming to new experiences and accepting of differences as we live each day.

Today if you’ve been filtering your experiences with ideas about how things should be, open the playing field a little wider. Welcome new ideas and you’ll be amazed at what you’ll learn. Your life will become richer and deeper. There are endless new things to see and learn and do. Broaden your vision and see everything available to you. Let the filters go and open all the doors. You’ll have a greater experience as you move forward.

Friend Request

10 Feb

A friend is a great thing to have.  They are someone who will rejoice with us when things go well and be in our corner supporting us when they don’t.  A true friend will stand by us through the trials and challenges we face, give us advice, listen when we need to vent, and have our backs when we need them.  It’s wonderful to have them in our lives.  We value them, we love them and we count on them.  But sometimes maybe someone we thought was a friend does something that makes us see them in a new light.  Perhaps they choose something they know will hurt us, or act in ways that are demeaning or critical.  We may always re-evaluate our relationships with them, and if we choose to, may go forward without them.  Being a friend is a wonderful gift but it carries with it the great responsibility of respecting the relationship.  If that responsibility is neglected we may lose.  Losing a friend is disappointing, sometimes heartbreaking, but if our trust in them is broken we may have to continue on without them.  We may step back from any relationship we need to.  We deserve to be happy and if our situation changes and brings us sorrow, we may change our way forward.

Sometimes there may be people who want to be our friends with whom we aren’t comfortable.  Perhaps their lives are very different from ours and we don’t understand them.  Maybe we have seen them hurt others or act dishonestly.  Or maybe they aren’t genuine and often seem to be pretending to be something they aren’t.  There are lots of reasons we may feel uncomfortable around others and if we do, we are not required to allow them close into our lives.  We may be polite and kind, and still walk another way.  There are all kinds of people in the world.  We will relate to some of them and others will remain strangers.  We can choose whom to allow into our lives and how much we will share.  Having friends is a great asset and we can make sure those relationships will bring us happiness.

We all have free agency and can make any decisions we like.  If we aren’t careful or don’t care, we may make choices that break relationships and ruin our friendships.  It’s painful to lose the friendship of someone we’ve shared our lives with but if we’ve chosen something that has hurt them and broken their trust that may happen.  We may try to explain our position in an effort to repair the situation but if the damage is too great it may not be possible to continue forward as their friend.  Every decision we make has consequences which may be far reaching or even destructive.  We know how to make excellent decisions and if we are mindful and careful we will be able to preserve our relationships and find great joy having them in our lives.

Today if you’ve lost a good friend because of something that has happened, determine what is best for you and go forward with confidence.  If you’ve done something that has hurt a relationship with someone you care about, do what you can to repair the loss.  We all want true, honorable friends.  Be honest and caring, and those around you will draw close to you.  Be the friend you most want in your life and you will find happiness.

After You

6 Nov

We all want to do things well and shine in our accomplishments. We may want to impress others with our talents and abilities and in order to do that we have to get their attention. Getting attention is generally easy, and if we’re focusing exclusively on ourselves trying to get noticed, we may not even see others around us. We’re honed in on the task at hand and can only see our particular way forward. But others are around us, and sometimes they are working hard to be noticed as well. It’s great to be first, but it’s also good to let others go ahead from time to time. If we take a step out of the limelight once in a while and let someone else step up, we can learn a lot about them, and about ourselves. If we’re used to steaming ahead to the front of the line it may take some thought to step back, but when we do, there is a lot to be gained.

When we’re rushing around from place to place and task to task we keep our eyes trained on the way ahead. As we grab the door and rush into where we want to be we might not see someone standing right next to us. Slowing down just a little and allowing them to pass teaches us patience and helps us remember we aren’t the only person in the world. We can learn to say, “After you,” open the door for someone else, and let them go first. We all have a lot to offer, and if we pay attention we can learn from those around us. If we are so focused on our personal goals and what’s happening in our lives, it will be difficult, if not impossible, to learn anything from anyone else. But we can step back, we can slow down a little, and we can take notice. We can let someone else lead.  Letting them go first doesn’t diminish our accomplishments, and will give us a broader view of who we are.

It’s easy to be selfish and concentrate only on what we want to do. It doesn’t take much thought and we can ignore everyone else if we want to. But extending ourselves a little and allowing those near us to share our lives is important. We can give a little space, offer a little time, and let someone else go ahead of us once in a while. We don’t always have to be first. We can share the light and we can expand our focus. When we do, we build relationships and make connections that will bring us contentment in the long run. Our lives are enhanced when we share them with others, and learning to say, “After you,” is one way to start.

Today if you’ve been pushing ahead, and rushing to get to the front of the line, look around and notice who’s next to you. You are great and have a lot to offer. You don’t have to prove how terrific you are by being first all the time. Everyone will notice you even when you let others go first. Share the road as you go forward, and build relationships. It’s far better to be with friends than strangers, and taking a moment to share with those near you is the first step.

That Flower Thing

28 Aug

In Greek mythology the story is told of Narcissus.  There are a few different versions, but the basic idea is that Narcissus’s mother was told he would live to an old age if he didn’t look upon himself.  Sadly, he fell in love with his own reflection, and died.  The Narcissus flower grew up on the spot where he died.  Narcissistic behavior gets its name from this story.  If basically refers to people who only see themselves, who only do things that benefit themselves, and believe they are the most important person.  If we have someone in our lives who carries these types of traits, it can be difficult to deal with them.  And because they only recognize their own needs, it’s hard to have a relationship with them.

To build healthy and beneficial relationships, we have to be willing to give and take.  We need to compromise, and carry half the responsibility of making things work.  If we have a relationship with someone who is only interested in serving themselves, it’s nearly impossible to move forward, and build anything that will last.  If we only see what’s in it for us, we will fail.  Relationships are complex, and if we want to make them strong and happy we have to do our part.  That means we have to be willing to give to the other person, and not just take what works for us.  Because the relationship is important, we have to accept that sometimes we will not get things our way.

Probably all of us have known narcissistic types of people.  They tend to be the ones who have to be first, who have to do things their way, who have to be comfortable, and who need a lot of attention.  It’s exhausting to be around them for long, and if we try to build a relationship with them the path is often filled with complications.  If we have these tendencies ourselves, we may expect too much from others.  We may be frustrated that others don’t see things exactly as we do.  But if we want to be successful in our relationships, and if we want to be happy we have to learn to give, and let go of our need for things to go exactly our way.  We have to be willing to concede from time to time.

Today if you’re dealing with someone who only sees themselves, try to be patient and explain what you need from them.  Set the example by extending yourself and including them.  If you are struggling with the need for things to go exactly your way, try to remember that others have great ideas, and working together is very rewarding.  We all have a lot to offer, and we all need to be heard.  Today offer your viewpoint and then listen to others.  Give and take.  That’s what it’s all about.