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Just Today

18 Jun

From time to time we all worry about things. Perhaps there’s been something on your mind, and it just won’t leave you alone. You can’t help it. You think about it constantly. You worry about what’s coming. You worry about what will happen tomorrow. We all have concerns sometimes, and they can make us worry – sometimes for good reason, sometimes unnecessarily. Whether the reason is good or not, worrying about what might happen doesn’t change anything. All it does is take us out of the present. We can’t fully live the day we’re in if we’re worrying about a day to come.

Each day we have on earth is a blessing. We take them for granted, and sometimes just go through the motions, but each day is a blessing. We often realize what an enormous blessing they are when they are suddenly threatened. Something happens where we understand we might not have tomorrow. We may get sick, a friend may die, or there may be a disaster that wakes us up, and makes us realize how lucky we are to have today. Today is the only day we can live. We can’t live tomorrow yet – it hasn’t arrived. Yesterday is gone, and nothing can be done to take us back to it. So we have just this one day. And if we spend it worrying about what tomorrow will bring, we will have wasted it.

We are powerful, and capable beings. We can do a lot when we want to. But most of us cannot read the future. We don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow or even five minutes from now. We are living now – not later. What will come to us after this is out of our control. So how can we manage something that is worrisome? A good way to let the worry go is to do something about what’s going on in our lives today. There is something we can take care of today, there is something we can work on today, and there is something we can manage today. While we’re working on today, we won’t have time to worry about tomorrow. We are managing our lives as they roll forward. Tomorrow will get here when it gets here. What comes will come. And whatever it is, we will face it then.

If you’re worried, and having trouble letting it go, do something that is important today. Work hard. Get busy living today. You’ll get things done, your mind will be focused on something productive, and you will forget to worry. Tomorrow you will handle whatever comes. You are perfectly capable of handling it – tomorrow. Today is all that concerns you now. One day at a time is all we have. Live your life that way. Live today. It’s a great day to be alive.

Defining Us

16 Jun

Have you ever faced a challenge you didn’t think you could conquer? Something beyond what you felt you could manage? Have you ever felt overwhelmed at a problem you had to face? These times happen to all of us. Very difficult hurdles come that at first may shake us. We may have no idea how we’re going to overcome them, or even how we’re going to face them. When these things happen, they are usually critical, and demand our attention. Even if we’re unsure, even if we’re scared, we have to look at the huge hill before us, and just start climbing.

What defines us as people? Is it what we own? Is it what we’ve done? Is it how much money we make, or how many friends we have? What makes us who we are? When we think about our strengths, and our weaknesses, we can see that every facet of our personalities has been molded, and shaped by the experiences we’ve had. Our experiences are vast as we live our lives. Every day brings something new. And each challenge we face makes us a little stronger, a little braver, and a little truer. What defines us is how we face them.

When very difficult issues come into our lives, when we are facing the dragon, and there is fire all around us, we will come face to face with our fears. What if we can’t do this? What if we fail? What if this destroys us? There are a lot of things that can go wrong when we have a lot to surmount. But if we stand strong, and take it as it comes, face each moment and conquer them one at a time, we can overcome even the hardest of challenges. As we navigate the problem, as we deal with each complication, as we unravel each puzzle, we learn new skills, and we become stronger. Because of that strength, when the next hurdle arrives, we are ready to begin again. There is nothing we can’t handle. There is nothing we can’t face. We are powerful, and we are capable. If we remember that, we will not only survive, we will thrive.

Today if you are facing something very hard, something that is threatening, and you are afraid you cannot conquer it, remember who you are. You can do anything. Be fearless. You may not get every step right, but you will eventually reach the end, and you will overcome. You have more strength than you realize. You have the very best of everything inside you. You have everything you need. Don’t forget that. You will beat this. It’s just a hill after all, and you’ve been climbing those your entire life.

No Thank You

13 Jun

We have opportunities to do a lot of things every day. There are always tasks that must be done, chores we must manage, and other responsibilities. And there are fun options as well. Our friends, and family play a part in our daily tasks when they need, or want us to do something with them, or for them. Most of us like to be helpful, and we try to comply as much as possible when someone wants our time. But sometimes that isn’t possible. And sometimes we really don’t want to do what is being asked.

Just because someone thinks we should do something, doesn’t mean we are compelled to do it. It’s easy to fall into the trap that we must do everything we are asked to do, but that isn’t true. It’s up to us. We can say no. Even if the person asking us really wants us to go along, we have the power to decline. It’s one thing if they really need our help, and we want to be there. But sometimes the request has less to do with need, and more to do with what the other person wants us to do.

For instance, if we have a network of friends that we do things with socially, we may enjoy that. But sometimes our lives change, and we may decide we don’t want to spend so much time with them. Sometimes we want to do other things. There may be pressure from the group to keep the status quo, not to change the pattern. But if we want to move on to something else, we may. Pressure from others will always affect our decisions, but in the end we should feel empowered to do what is best for us, and nobody knows what that is but us. We can, and we should, choose that. It’s not selfish to direct our own lives. It’s appropriate. We can be kind and giving, while still ensuring we are doing what is most important to us.

Today, if you’re feeling pressured to do something you really don’t want to do, you may say, “No, thank you.” You may politely decline. If others insist that you go along, you may still politely decline. It’s up to you. Smile and be gracious, but stay true to what is best for you. The road you’re on is yours alone. You get to choose the steps. Make the best choice that will take you where you want to be. And be confident. When we choose what’s best for us, it’s the best choice to make.

Getting There

30 May

Each day brings with it opportunities for growth and experience. Sometimes those opportunities are fun, sometimes they’re not, sometimes we ignore them, and sometimes we embrace them. It changes from day to day. But as we go along, there will be things we want to learn and gain. We may want to extend ourselves more. We may want to change our professional lives, or our academic success. We may want to be more social or more welcoming. The list is endless, and there are a lot of things we can pursue if we want to. But learning new behaviors, and changing personal patterns isn’t always easy. Before we begin, we have to really want the change. We have to really want the growth. It doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time, and we have to be diligent if we want to succeed.

It is said that our reach should exceed our grasp. We should be seeking beyond what we have accomplished. When we are reaching for something new, whatever that is, it’s a stretch. We have to push ourselves in a new direction. It may feel uncomfortable at first but like stretching our bodies, the more we do it, the further we can reach. We probably won’t succeed on our first attempt, but if we keep stretching, keep reaching, we will get there. This takes discipline and patience. The change may be slow, but if we work on it and keep our eyes on the goal, it will get easier to stay on track. And if we continue each day to move just a tiny bit closer, we will reach our destination. We will get to the goal, and we will be successful.

Often when we decide we need a change, we want it immediately. We can clearly see where we want to be, and waiting for it can be frustrating. Learning to get there can be hard. We can feel awkward and ungainly as we figure it out, and fine tune exactly how to go forward. Reaching beyond our grasp is challenging, but with patience, we can succeed.

Today if you are reaching for something that has eluded you, if you are trying hard to make a change that seems just out of your reach, keep stretching. Give yourself time. The goal is attainable. You’ll get there. And once you’ve succeeded, your confidence will soar. You can do anything. Keep reaching. You’re almost there.

The Simple Life

23 May

There is a lot to be said for a simple life. A life lived without complications, without drama, without intrigue – a simple, straightforward existence. Of course, we can only control some of the complications, drama, and intrigue that come into our lives. We live in a world with other people – friends, family, acquaintances, clients – and they all come in and out of our lives on a regular basis. There are all kinds of people, all over the place. They complicate and compliment our lives. And their choices can affect our lives.

Since we can’t control what anyone else does, and we can’t always control circumstances, it’s in our best interest to control what we can. We have a choice each day as to how we will navigate what comes to us. We can face our challenges with a calm demeanor, or we can over react, get intense, and have a more difficult time. It isn’t always easy to be calm, it isn’t always easy to control our emotions, but if we work at it, we can find a place where we feel more comfortable in times of stress.

I have a friend who loves drama. Everything that happens to her is a big deal. Every disappointment is the end of the world. Every situation she gets involved in is filled with drama. She seems to need the stress, and conflict in her life. If she gets involved in a situation where there isn’t any intensity, she creates it. She feeds on the struggle, the intrigue of guessing, and the anxiety of potential disaster. She is rarely even tempered, rarely truthful about what is really going on, and makes up stories to spice up every situation. It’s exhausting to be near her. It’s challenging to work with her. And it’s nearly impossible to trust her.

It’s much more advisable to see, and accept things as they really are. Not hiding when it’s difficult, not pretending the situation is different, not making up stories about what is real – just facing reality as it exists. This is always the best course. It sounds simple, but sometimes our reality is not what where we want to be. Sometimes it’s easier to pretend that it’s different than it really is. But if we want to live an honest, noble life, we have to live it cleanly. Without illusion, without drama, and without exaggeration. We have to live it as it really is.

Today, if you feel the need to pad a situation to make it more palatable, or to cover up what is really happening, think again. No matter what the issue is, facing it openly, scars and all, is the best option. Making up false pretense complicates our lives, and makes it more difficult in the end. What is real is all we need to face. Face that. Keep your eyes wide open. Facing true reality brings us confidence. And with confidence there is no need to dress anything up. It is what it is. And that’s just fine. You can manage that.