Tag Archives: Cheat

Sinking Feeling

11 May

We share the world with billions of other people. We’ll build relationships with some of them, we’ll love some of them and tolerate others, and they’ll be a part of our experiences. When we trust someone and believe in them, we may include them in our most private thoughts and plans, and build connections that are strong and rewarding. Although we may feel we’re good judges of character, and often we are, we may face a time when someone turns out to be very different than we thought. If we discover they have been dishonest with us, have manipulated us or flatly lied to us and we believed in them, we may be devastated. When all the facts come out, we may have a sinking feeling that we’ve been used and everything we thought was real was fiction. There may be a feeling of great shame that we fell for the lie, but we are not at fault. It’s good to trust and give others the benefit of the doubt. If they let us down, the blame is theirs to carry. If we’re facing a situation where our trust has been damaged, if the situation isn’t too severe and there are extenuating circumstances that have come into play, there may be a way to mend the relationship. However, if the other party simply manipulated us for their own enjoyment or personal gain, there may be no way to repair the damage. We may need to sever our ties, walk away, and move forward without them. It’s heartbreaking to lose a connection because of dishonesty, but we are strong, and nothing can keep us from reaching success. We can change direction, and alter our plans, and still reach every goal we desire. Others will do what they will, but we know what we want, and have everything we need to achieve it. Every road is there for us, and with determination and focus, we will succeed.

After a bad relationship, we may decide that trusting others isn’t worth the risk and choose to move forward alone. We may avoid building relationships with others to protect ourselves and keep everything inside. We can do anything we like but most people are good, and everyone has something of value to offer. Cutting ourselves off from the human race may seem wise, but it will keep us from all the blessings that building good, strong relationships will bring. Getting hurt is painful, but we will heal, and can trust ourselves to make wise connections moving forward.

We can’t control anything but the decisions we make. Some people will be wise, and some will be foolish. Some may delight in bringing us joy, and others may taunt and tease. We don’t set our personal standards by what others are doing. We set them by what we want to accomplish and who we want to be. We can trust ourselves to make excellent choices and move forward with confidence and clarity that we will prevail in every situation.

Today if you’ve discovered that someone you trusted has been dishonest, and you are hurt and unsure how to proceed, trust yourself. You know what you want, and you know who you are. You are wiser and more capable than you imagine. Decide what you want to do and step forward with confidence. All your dreams are still there for you and you will reach them.

Pierced Through

28 Jan

We build all kinds of relationships as we go through our lives. Our families, our close friends, our treasured associates, and others embellish our lives and we cherish our connections to them. It’s good to have strong, healthy connections with those we value and love. But our interpretation of a relationship may be different from the other’s point of view. They may not feel as close to us as we do to them, or they may have their own ideas about what the relationship can give them. If they are looking to use it to move themselves forward or get something they want, and don’t care about our feelings, they may betray us in ways we never imagined. Being set up or betrayed by someone we trust can be excruciating. It can feel like we’ve been pierced through with something sharp and wicked. We may be so stunned by what they’ve done we can’t move and must stand still until we fully understand what’s happened. Betrayal is a bitter and extremely painful experience. Everything has gone up in smoke and the connection we thought we had has been completely severed. It’s very difficult to repair the damage done. After the fracture, our entire landscape may change, and we may find we’re on completely new ground. It’s a very hard thing to endure, but it gives us valuable information. Once the truth of our relationship has been exposed, we can look at everything clearly and make the best decision for stepping forward. Even if we’ve lost something important, we’ve gained the wisdom and knowledge we need to continue with confidence, sure of the road ahead. We are far stronger and wiser than we imagine, and nothing can hold us in place. With clarity and focus, we will find the way forward and reach success.

When someone hurts us deeply, after we recover from the initial shock and pain, we may set our sights on revenge. They hurt us, so we’ll hurt them right back. It seems fair – they started it after all. But focusing on revenge will take us away from the things we want to accomplish. The time spent coming up with ways to make someone else miserable is time we could be spending on moving closer to the goals we want. By letting it go and pushing forward toward success, we win. We control our future and can achieve anything we desire.

Some people are just rotten. They don’t care who they hurt so long as they get what they want. We’re all accountable for everything we do, and eventually will pay for every choice we make. But when that happens is unknown. It’s hard to watch bad people get ahead and succeed, but their day of reckoning will come. In the meantime, we can focus on our own goals and dreams, and design our lives in ways that bring us great joy and satisfaction. We are powerful and intelligent, and can do anything we desire. Every single blessing is there for us, and we will make them ours.

Today if you’ve been betrayed by someone and are struggling to find the way forward, trust yourself. You are amazing and capable. Nothing can keep you from anything you desire. Look at everything openly and objectively, and choose the road ahead that will take you to success. Every dream is there for you, and you will prevail.

Getting It Back

11 Apr

There are all kinds of people in the world.  Some are nice, helpful and polite, and when we deal with them things often go well.  But there are opposites in everything and some people we run into may be mean spirited and cruel.  They may do things that hurt us, demean us, or in other ways make us feel bad about ourselves and our lives.  If they are forceful and powerful we may shrink every time we interact with them.  It’s difficult to be around mean people who are rude and hateful and as we deal with them, we may feel our confidence slipping away.  If they continually insult us or make snide remarks to us or about us we may begin to feel insecure and find our resolve weakening.  We all have the right to choose anything we like and some people will choose badly.  When they come into our lives they may bring us hardship and grief.  When we begin to feel the effects of their negative influence we may try to simply deal with it or ignore it and continue on, but we have the power and the right to stand up for ourselves.  We need not allow anyone to demean us or criticize us without responding.  If we’ve lost our confidence, we can get it back.  We can stand strong in the face of ignoble behavior and refuse to allow it to compromise us.  If someone says something derogatory to us, we can state clearly that we will not tolerate comments that hurt or demean us.  There is great power is speaking up and we can claim it.  We are strong and capable and need not allow others to run us down.  Our gifts to the world are unique and we are precious and valuable.  Remembering our personal self-worth will help us face any difficulty or challenge in our lives.  We can stand strong, reclaim any confidence we’ve lost, and continue forward with strength and determination.

Diminishing others may make some feel more powerful and influential, but this kind of behavior is destructive and there is nothing of value to be gained by demeaning others.  Each individual brings something the world needs and when we honor them instead of ridicule them we are embellished and gratified.  When we reach out with charity and benevolence, we enhance goodness in those around us and raise them up.  We choose the type of influence we bring to the world and when we choose wisely, everyone benefits.

No influence is more powerful than kindness and charity.  Everything we do brings something into our lives.  If we lie, we lose the trust of those around us.  If we cheat, we lose our integrity.  If we criticize and demean, we lose our connections to others.    We can be noble and virtuous and choose paths that will bring us peace and each choice we makes tells the world who we are.

Today if you feel bad because of something someone has said or done and have lost your confidence, remember who you are and do what is needed to get it back.  You have so much to offer.  You are incredible and amazing, and the whole world is blessed because you are here.  Be strong and sure.  You have everything you need to succeed and nothing will hold you down.

Fair and Even

7 Mar

As we interact with others who come in and out of our lives, we will meet many different kinds of people.  Some will be nice and enhance our experiences, and others may be difficult.  Everyone has their own expressions and ideas about life. We may agree with them at times and or we may be at odds.  There is an old expression, “An eye for an eye,” which loosely means I will give you back what you give to me.  It seems fair to return what we’ve been given and we may want to keep the score even by doing so.  However, if someone does something mean or hateful to us, returning that to them may not serve us well.  We may feel better hitting back, but all we will have accomplished is proving we can go as low as they did.  Who we are is defined by what we do, not what is done to us.  What seems fair may not always be the best choice.  If we want to be the best we can be, we must be willing to reach higher when we’ve been hit below the belt.  When we’ve been betrayed, scorned, cheated on, lied to, or in any other way demeaned, we can step back and decide what is in our best interest going forward.  We need not continue relationships that don’t work.  We can keep a high standard for our behavior and walk away from those who choose another road.  We are always in control of our decisions and can choose the paths that take us where we want to go.  We can be fair and still move forward with grace and dignity.  We deserve the very best of everything.  By choosing well, we will achieve it.

The fight or flight reflex can have a huge influence over us when we’re in situations that are threatening or aggressive.  We may have an almost uncontrollable desire to run from whomever is involved, or we may feel anger rise in us and desire to smash our opponent.  This is a survival mechanism that warns us of impending danger.  However, most of the time we may not be in real danger, but threatened by a situation or person who is bullying and forceful.  If we take a minute to think about how best to proceed instead of simply reacting, we will find greater success moving forward.  We can take a deep breath, recognize the instinctive cues, and then calmly make a decision about how to proceed.  We can be in control of our lives even when things go wrong and choose the best paths ahead.

Sometimes people get ahead and win despite poor decisions and bad behavior.  It’s hard to watch someone succeed by cheating or bullying, and it goes against our ideas of fair play.  When those who are dishonest or unethical win, we may feel burned and angry.  But life has a way of looping around and in the end, there is no way to escape personal accountability.  We can ensure our peace and happiness going forward by making the best choices each day and choosing the paths that will take us where we most want to go.

Today if someone has done something to hurt you and you want to get back at them, remember who you are and what you really want.  Reach higher and choose the road that will take you to excellence.  You are amazing and powerful, and nothing will stop you from succeeding.  Make your best decisions and every road will open ahead.

Saying No

20 Jan

There are times when we are asked to do things we can’t accomplish or don’t feel comfortable with. Perhaps we don’t have the time to do what is being asked, or the request is something we don’t want to be involved in. And sometimes, what we’re being asked to do is something we simply can’t do because we don’t have the skills needed to accomplish it. When someone we love asks us for something and we feel we can’t comply, it may be difficult to say no. We want to help and we want to be supportive. But if we can’t do it, it’s worse to say we will and then disappoint others because we failed than it is to simply say no at the beginning. Saying no is more difficult for some of us than it is for others. We might feel that being cooperative is imperative in our relationships and saying no will damage them. But if the relationship is healthy and there is mutual respect, declining a request will not hurt. We can feel empowered to make the best choices for ourselves, even if they aren’t the choices others would have us make. We know what’s best for us and we are entitled to have it.

When we decline a request, in their disappointment others may employ guilt to try and make us change our minds. Guilt is very powerful and if we aren’t careful, it can undermine our decisions. But guilt is a self inflicted emotion. Nobody can make us feel it. People can say things to try and inflict it upon us, and do things to encourage us to change our minds. But if we’ve made a decision that’s best for us, we need not allow guilt to enter in. There is no reason to feel guilty for making a good choice. Good choices are the best we can do, and feeling guilty for making them isn’t necessary. If we remember that and focus on going forward truthfully and with a genuine spirit, we’ll make the best decisions possible.

Sometimes we may be asked to do things that make us very uncomfortable. For instance, being asked to lie for someone else, or manipulate situations to help another get the upper hand, or cheat to help a friend – all may make us uneasy. If we go along and compromise our values to please someone else, we may hurt ourselves in the long run. Happiness comes from being true to who we are no matter what situation we’re in. However, if the person asking intently pleads with us, it may be difficult to make the best choice. At times like those, it’s helpful to step back and see the situation objectively. We already know what the best answer is, and stepping back just a little will help us find the wisdom and courage to make it. We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to do. It doesn’t matter who is asking us or what the parameters of the situation are. If we aren’t comfortable we can say no and move on. We can always make the best choices going forward.

Today if you’re being pressured to do something you don’t feel good about, you can say no. You are entitled to make your own decisions. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks you should do, you can do what is best for you. You know what you need to do and you know the right road going forward. Choose that and you’ll always be headed in the right direction.