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Turbulence

11 Apr

When we’re traveling by air and take a seat on an airplane, we hope for a safe flight that is smooth and without complications. We want to get to our destination without undue stress or unnecessary excitement. Generally that’s what happens. We fly from place to place without incident or worry. But sometimes because of weather conditions we have turbulence. When that happens, the pilot puts the seat belt sign on and we’re asked to stay in our seats. If there is only minor turbulence most travelers endure the small bumps without concern. But if there is a ferocious storm or high winds, things may get intense as the plane is bounced around, and sometimes falls for what seems like forever before correcting. When that happens, turbulence is a completely different experience. Although air travel is by far the safest mode of transportation, it can be unnerving and frightening to sit belted in during severe turbulence. Although we may feel confident that everything will be fine, we may also feel worry and fear. We can have turbulence in our personal lives as well.  Everyone wants their lives to go along smoothly, and we don’t want difficult times to come upon us.  However, chances are they probably will, and things will get bumpy.  We may feel concerned and unsure.  But just like being on a plane, we can buckle in, sit tight, and get through.

No matter how pro-active we are, no matter how we prepare and plan, sometimes things go awry. There are a lot of people in our lives and they often impact what happens to us either purposefully for inadvertently. There is an old saying that if you want to see God laugh, make plans. It can feel that way sometimes. But all we can do is make the best decisions possible and hope things work out the way we want them to. When they don’t, we have to find another way. There are endless opportunities to change our minds and there is never just one way to do things. If we’re facing a storm, and the plane starts to fall a little, we can regroup and correct our course.

Because this life is all about our relationships with others and a lot of what we do depends on their decisions, there will be times when we’ll be hurt. It’s not possible to live our entire lives without being hurt from time to time. If the pain is extensive and we feel devastated, it can be like trying to navigate through strong winds in a horrible storm. We may slip, we might fall, it may be difficult to see the road ahead, and we might think we can’t survive. But there isn’t anything too hard for us to overcome. There is no storm so powerful that it will leave us hopeless. We can find a seat belt by focusing on our abilities, and we can sit tight as we figure out what to do next. We don’t have to go into the storm alone either. We can get help from those we trust and we can find our way. Turbulence isn’t pleasant. It’s upsetting when things get tossed around and we lose our footing. But no storm lasts forever, and no wind can blow without stopping. We have everything we need to make it through.

Today if things are bumpy and you’re unsure, and if there are problems that are making it hard to navigate, hang on. This is just turbulence. Sit tight and take your time. You have everything you need to find solid ground again and there are clear skies ahead. Keep your focus and trust your instincts. You will make it to the other side and find your way. You are stronger and smarter than you realize.

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Done Deal

8 Apr

We do a lot of things every day. We try new things, start new projects, begin on a new path, and continue on. There are endless things to learn and do. We can tackle any challenge we want to and we can succeed. But sometimes we don’t finish what we start. Maybe the project ended up taking more time than we planned on, or maybe it turned out to be more complicated or expensive than we wanted. When we don’t finish things and don’t let them go, they hang around on the periphery of our lives. Maybe we stuff them in a closet and although ignore them, see them every day. Maybe we put them in a drawer and try to forget them, but we know they’re there. If we don’t plan to finish whatever we’ve been working on, and we want to move forward, we need to let them go. Otherwise, they will be a constant reminder of what we didn’t do. We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to, and if we’ve decided we’re not going to finish something it’s best to remove it completely. We can give it away, throw it away, erase it from our to-do list, forget it, and move on.

When we have unfinished business around us it can undermine our confidence. We may believe we should have done more to complete it or managed it better. Those thoughts can hold us back and we may struggle thinking we should try to work on it again. We can always go back to anything we’ve left behind but if we’ve decided we’re not going to do it, we can let it go. Moving forward is our privilege and we don’t have to focus on things that hold us back. We accomplish a lot of things well, and if we come upon something we can’t or don’t want to complete, we can move on. If it’s important enough to finish even when we don’t want to, we can do that as well. Either way it’s our choice, and we can make it.

If we are judicious in our decisions about what we will and won’t do, we’ll be more successful in completing the tasks we take on. We can’t do everything and promising to do more than we can will only lead to disappointment. We can take some time to evaluate what we realistically are able to do, and then decide from there. Making careful decisions about our time will enable us to find success. It’s easy to get carried away and agree to do more than we can. There are a lot of people in the world and sometimes it seems they all want something from us. But we’re in control of our lives and our time. If we know we won’t be able to finish something it’s best not to start. Leaving things unfinished again and again may impact our confidence. If we are wise and choose carefully, we’ll be more successful in completing the things we’ve chosen, and feel better about our accomplishments.

Today if you’ve got unfinished projects that are niggling at you, think about what you can realistically complete and let the rest go. You aren’t a failure for not finishing something. You are wise to manage your time. You know what you can and can’t do. Let go of the things you can’t, and you’ll be successful completing the things you can.

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High Expectations

7 Apr

When we’re trying to do something new or we’re learning a new skill, sometimes we expect to be able to do it perfectly from the start. Even if we acknowledge intellectually that may not be possible, we may hope for it nonetheless. Sometimes our expectations for ourselves are unrealistically high. We think we should be able to do anything we want and do it well. Unfortunately, life doesn’t really work that way. We all do some things well, and some things not so well. But when we want to do something badly we may think we should be good at it from the beginning. Expecting perfection can lead to failure. If our expectations are too high and we fall short we may give up. And giving up gets us nowhere. Just learning and trying something new is enough to start. If we can learn to be more patient and more accepting with ourselves we’ll be happier and more comfortable as we move along.

The world sets high standards. Never in history have we been expected to do more than we are today. The ideals of perfection are everywhere we look. There are constant messages that our appearances, our lifestyles, our finances, and our personal lives should be flawless and accomplished without effort. Of course none of that is possible. If we internalize the messages we see virtually everywhere, we can feel we aren’t good enough, fast enough, strong enough, rich enough, or smart enough. There is no way to be perfect at everything despite the messages we hear. The truth is we will do some things very well, and some things will elude us. We can decide what our lives will look like and what we’ll do. No matter what we hear and see, we can determine how we’ll go forward and find satisfaction in knowing we’re doing things our way. We can set our expectations in ways that bring us success and happiness.

Some people do amazing things that change the world. But those are extreme and extraordinarily rare. We all have successes in our lives but they may not be on such a grand scale. That does not diminish the importance of the success. When we live purposefully, directing our lives on the paths we most want to follow and achieve our goals, we are successful. The goals we set don’t have to be monumental. No matter what they are, if we achieve them, we are successful. We don’t have to do extraordinary things to make the world a better place. Just by living well, being kind and supportive, showing compassion, and taking care of ourselves makes an impact for good. There isn’t anyone else like us anywhere on earth. We don’t have set impossible expectations or be perfect in the eyes of the world. We are perfect just as we are.

Today if you’ve been expecting a lot from yourself and have set your standards high, remember you are perfect just as you are. Your kindness and compassion are making the world a better place. We are all blessed because you’re here. You’re one of a kind and bring a light no one else can offer. Be who you are. It’ll be exactly right.

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Convinced

6 Apr

As we go through our lives there may be times when we’re asked to do things we may not be enthusiastic about or aren’t sure we want to do. It could be something personal, something involving our families, or something in the professional arena. Whatever it is, there may be others who try to convince us we need to do it, or who try to make us do it. Unless the person asking has authority over us we don’t have to comply with any request. But it can be hard to say no when those who want compliance are close to us. They may try to control us or manipulate us into doing what they want. If their influence is strong enough we may acquiesce. But if we do, we may not be happy. When we have feelings for someone, we can be vulnerable. If they ask us for something and we aren’t convinced the request is in our best interest, but do it anyway, it may damage the relationship. We all get to make our own decisions. We can choose anything we like and if we choose things we don’t want, we may have regrets later. If things don’t go well we may say we were made to comply but that’s not completely true. The fact is we are in control of our own lives. If we acquiesce and do something we don’t want to do, we are choosing that path. And when we do, we also choose where it takes us. If we aren’t convinced the decision is in our best interest, no matter who is pushing it, we need to choose what’s best for us.

Influence is a powerful tool. When we love someone we want them to be happy. If they ask us for something we often want to comply. But if they want something we don’t want to give it may be difficult to decide. We can choose anything we like. We can go along even when we don’t want to, or we can decline. If we go along and things don’t work out and we get hurt, we may blame the requestor. However, that’s not fair. We make our own decisions and if we chose to go along, we own the results of that choice. We are accountable for every decision we make. If we don’t want to do something and do it anyway, we own it.

Learning to be genuine and honest in all our dealings takes determination. If we honestly decide what we want to do and where we want to go, there may be times when others disagree. If they want us to go another way and we refuse, they may not be happy. But being honest in every choice keeps us on the road we want to travel. If we take a detour to do something chosen by someone else, we may end up going somewhere we don’t want to go. Although some will be annoyed when we don’t comply, we can respectfully decline any request that isn’t right for us. If we are honest in every situation our lives will reflect what we want most, and take us to the destination we choose. We are entitled to live our lives any way we like. If that isn’t what someone else wants, we can still choose our own path.

Today if you’re being influenced to do something you aren’t sure about you may decline. You have the right to make the best choices for yourself and choose where you want to go. This is your day. You are capable of doing anything you like. Design the life you want most and you’ll find true happiness.

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What It’s Not

5 Apr

Change is an inevitable part of life.  Every day we face new things, learn new ways of managing them, and grow a little more.  We can learn by hearing about something but mostly we learn by doing.  If we don’t know how something is done and we have to figure it out, we can jump in and start.  But sometimes in the process we don’t figure things out by seeing what something is.  Sometimes it’s what it’s not that teaches us.  If our first impressions are incorrect we may not realize it until we’ve been in the situation for a while.  For example, we meet someone who is very brusque and seems to be wrapped up in their own world.  We might think they’re rude or arrogant, but then after interacting with them over time we discover they aren’t like that at all.  First impressions are important but they can be wrong.  It’s easy to believe we know the whole situation from the first moment, but that is rarely true.  We learn about things as we go, and sometimes what we thought was real wasn’t real at all.

We can only work with what we know at any given time.  Every day brings opportunities to learn and if we embrace them, we have a better shot of understanding how things really are.  There may be times when we want our world to look a certain way and don’t want to see the truth, and we look the other way.  We can pretend we are different than we really are, or that the situation isn’t the way it seems.  We can create our own little reality that has little truth in it.  If we do, we may be happy for the moment but true and lasting happiness will elude us.  Momentary bliss will never sustain us over time.  Truth has a way of surfacing and no matter how we try to hide from it, will find us in the end.  If we open our eyes and see things as they truly are we may be uncomfortable for a time but living truthfully is the only way to real and lasting happiness.

When we make judgments and later discover we were wrong we may feel disappointment or sorrow when we learn the truth.  If we were wrong about a personal relationship we care a lot about it may hurt deeply.  When people want something badly they sometimes pretend to be whatever it takes to get it.  If the other person was willing to do or say anything to bring us close, and we discover none of it was true it can be heartbreaking.  We could decide to ignore the truth and hope that in time our dreams will become real, but that may only postpone the inevitable.  It’s best to face the truth – whatever it is – as soon as we discover it.  Sometimes things aren’t what they seem.  Sometimes they are very different.  What they really are is what is real.  We can face whatever it is and we can still find happiness.  There isn’t a road too hard for us to travel.  We can face anything and we can find our way again.

Today if you see that things aren’t as you thought, you can turn your course.  The truth is there to show you the way.  There are endless roads in front of you, and you will choose the right one.  You know more now than you did before.  Use that going forward.  There isn’t anything you can’t do.  You have everything you need to be happy.

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