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Making Lists

22 Sep

When we have a lot to do, or things we want to remember, many of us make lists. We write down what we need to buy at the grocery store, the things we need to remember to get done, and the places we need to visit in accomplishing our errands. Sometimes we make personal lists too. We might record all the things we want to do better, or personal goals we haven’t yet addressed. If we’re the type of person who makes New Year’s Resolutions, those might cover all the things we want to change about ourselves, or ways we want to improve. It’s fine to make that kind of list, but if we only write the things we’re unhappy about and want to change, we might forget all the good qualities we have, and what we’re already doing right.

We all do a lot of things well. We’re responsible, we take care of business, we help out, and dozens of other things on a daily basis. We may forget how effective we are as we go about our daily chores. No matter how long our personal improvement lists are, if we take the time to make another list of all the things we’re doing well and what we like about ourselves, we often find it’s much longer than the one with all the things we want to change. But it seems we don’t often take the time to make that list at all. We take the things we do well for granted. We don’t think they are as important as what we need to change, but we’re wrong. What we’re doing well is very important, and it’s wise to remember that.

Most people are good, most people are kind, and most people care about others. There are some snakes in the mix to be sure, but most of us try hard to be nice and give when we can. There are all kinds of awards for accomplishments the world values, and trying our best to be our best should certainly be recognized. However, there really isn’t any sort of award for people who are nice, or loving, or kind. We need to value it in ourselves. We can plan for self-improvement if we wish, but we should also remember all that we have already accomplished.

Today if you’re making a list of all the things you want to change about yourself, make a second list of all the things you’re already doing well. No matter how much you want to change, chances are the list of things you’ve conquered will be longer. Remind yourself how great you really are. You’ve done a lot and you’ve come a long way. The road is long and there will always be something new to master, but as you travel, don’t forget all you’ve mastered already.

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Checking Out

7 Sep

Our lives are busy. We have things we have to do every day, things we need to get done, and responsibilities we can’t ignore. We sometimes make lists to get everything organized and check things off as we accomplish them. Get gas – check. Call the exterminator – check. Go to the dry cleaner – check. Buy batteries – check. And so it goes. We have sticky notes to remind us in our car, and on our mirror in the bathroom, and we’ve got reminders programmed into our phones. No matter how many things we get done, there is always more to do. Like bees in a field of flowers, we flit from one task to the next, busy and determined.

As we go about all these responsibilities, we may forget about taking time for ourselves. When we’re making our lists and programming our phones, we may not include a time out. But time out just for us is as important as all the tasks we need to take care of. A lot depends on us, so it’s important that we take care of ourselves. That means taking time to recharge and find our center again. Even bees take time out to rest, and so should we. We can add it to our list of things to get done. It seems like a simple step but when we don’t actually put it on the list, it tends to get neglected. What is the most restful and rewarding thing we can do today? What will rejuvenate us and help us go forward? Whatever it is, we need to get it on our lists of things to do.

Maybe we’d love a short break to go to our favorite coffee shop for a drink and a snack. Maybe we’d like to relax and read a book for fifteen minutes, or take a walk around the local park. Or maybe it would be perfect to just sit and do nothing. Whatever makes us happy, whatever gives us respite, whatever reminds us that we’re important, is something we should schedule for. I have a friend who writes “Simon” on her schedule every day for half an hour to spend time on something just for her. On her work schedule it looks like a meeting, and when her phone reminds her it’s time for Simon and she’s with others, she excuses herself and steps away. No matter what’s on her list that needs to get done, she makes sure Simon gets on it too. She makes time for herself a priority. When we become a priority in our busy lives, we’ll be happier, and that will help us accomplish everything else.

Today if you’re busy with lots to do, be sure to schedule a time out just for you. No matter how much there is to get done, take a short break and do something that will refresh you. You do so much. You deserve to do this for yourself. Check out for a while. Remember that you’re as important as anything else you’ll do today. Time is the best thing you can give to yourself. Schedule it in and take it.

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Same and Different

19 Aug

When we’re headed out to a vacation we’re excited about, everything feels good.  No matter how we’re traveling to get there, we’re content because the destination is something we’re looking forward to.  The cramped seat on the plane is fine, and the long road trip seems to fly by.  We’re happy anticipating the great time we’re going to have, and no matter what we go through to get there, we handle it with patience.  We’re smiling and happy.  Nothing can dampen our spirits, and when we arrive we’re excited.  Vacations are great for renewing our spirits, and recharging our batteries.  It’s fun to look forward to them, and a blast when we’re in them.

After our vacation time ends, and it’s time to head back home we sometimes have a different experience on the return trip.  Even though the distance coming back is exactly the same as the distance we traveled to get to our vacation, it seems longer.  The seat on the plane feels uncomfortable, the flight seems to last forever, and we may be tired and cranky.  If we’re in a car and have a long drive ahead of us, we may dread the interminable miles, the gas station stops, and the boredom of the road.  The trip home is merely the reverse of the trip out.  The distance is no longer and no farther away, but instead of being happy and excited as the miles fly by, we may just be grinding through it.

The two trips – going and coming back – are basically the same.  But our perception is completely different, and that difference changes how we react.  It’s the same with our experiences in life.  When we’re involved with something new we want to do, we feel energized and happy.  But when we’re in the same routine day after day, we may feel uninspired or bored.  It doesn’t have to be that way.  Every single day has within it opportunities to learn new things, meet new people, and do different activities.  It’s always rewarding to break away from the norm and do different things, and we can do that every day if we decide to.  It doesn’t have to be a formal vacation to make us excited and happy, although those are great.  We can be excited and happy in our daily lives as well.  It’s all about our perspective.  If we see each day as a beginning and a time to try something new, we can make our lives fun and exciting.  We can be excited every day at the prospect of opening new challenges, going through new doors, and experiencing new ideas.

Today, if you’re feeling like your life has become too predictable and you yearn for more fun and excitement, change things up.  Do something new.  Try something you’ve been thinking about, and plan a little vacation from your routine.  Break away from the norm.  You’ll feel more energized, and you’ll have more fun if you do.  There are countless opportunities available to you.  Find the fun and excitement of trying them.  Today is your gift to yourself.  Explore, reach out, expand, and have a blast.  There’s no time like the present to start having fun.

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Push and Pull

9 Aug

When we have an idea we want others to buy into, or when we have something we want to do and we need the help of others, it’s important that we are able to convince them to join us. If it’s something we’re passionate about, or something we are sure is right, we may be forceful in explaining why they must join us. We may try to push them into agreeing, or in some way try to make them come along. Even if we have the best idea ever conceived, trying to force others to join us usually doesn’t work. Everyone has their own ideas to offer, and most of us aren’t receptive to someone telling us we have to do things their way. If we try to push people into coming to our side, we may push them away instead.

So how can we get the support we need? If pushing and force won’t work, what will? Imagine trying to push a bulky object up a hill. When we are behind something pushing it, we can’t see what’s ahead on the path. There may be obstacles that need to be avoided in order to succeed, but we’re in the back pushing with all our might, and we can’t see them. When we run into them they impede our progress, making the task even harder than it was. On the other hand, if we are in front of the object, pulling it up the hill, we can see every complication as it comes along, and avoid pitfalls. It’s the same with people. Most of us do not respond well to being pushed. It’s irritating to be told we have to do something we haven’t agreed to. But we can be pulled into an idea if we are informed, and given time to understand why we should join in.

Pulling people in is much more effective than pushing them. Taking the time to explain what the plan is, what is needed to make it happen, and what is being requested helps others understand why they are needed. We can explain why it’s important to us, and then ask – not force – but ask for their help. Most of us would respond more positively treated this way. If we want cooperation, being positive will more likely bring the results we are seeking.

Today if you have something important you want to accomplish, and you need the help of others, pull them in by explaining what your plans are, and ask them to join you. Ask without expectation that they will agree. Ask, understanding they may accept or decline. If you are open and friendly, your demeanor will bring them in. You will be successful in getting the help you need. You have everything you need to succeed already. You can do anything.

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Dream Dream Dream

8 Jul

We all have dreams of things we want to do, places we want to see, and goals we want to accomplish. Sometimes they are big dreams, like opening our own business, and sometimes they are small, like riding on a train. We’re all different, and so are our dreams. Big or small, if we haven’t realized them yet, we think about them from time to time. They wait for us to remember them, and make them come true.

The realities of our lives don’t always allow us to realize our dreams when we want to. Sometimes we don’t have the finances we need, sometimes we aren’t in the right place, and sometimes, we’re just too busy. Life can get complicated and crazy, and we can be overcome with work, family responsibilities, or projects we’re doing. Time gets away from us. We can get so caught up in what we need to do, and what has to be done, that we may forget about the dreams we have outside of the chaos. But then we take a break, we sit down and let our minds drift, and there they are – those things we always said we would do. Those things we really want to do. They’re still there, waiting patiently for us to revisit them. Waiting for us to start.

When we’re ready, we can make a plan to achieve whatever we’ve been dreaming of. We can choose what we really want to do first, and start taking steps to make it to happen. Say we want to travel the world. Instead of having the undefined idea of “the world,” we could begin by picking the first place we would like to visit. Then we could figure out what it would take to get there in resources, and time. And then we could set a date to go. Once we have a plan in place, we can make adjustments if needed, but if we stick to it, we will accomplish our goal, and make that dream a reality.

Dreaming is great. We wonder about things, we imagine how they will go, and it’s exciting to think about them. But at some point we have to decide if we really want to do them or not. If we’ve changed, and really don’t care about a dream we’ve had, we can let it go. But if we really still want it, and it won’t go away, there is no better time than now to begin planning for it.

Today if you’re thinking about something you’ve always wanted to do, take the first step toward making it happen. Do something – research the parameters, make some calls, get information, and begin moving forward. You deserve to have all your dreams come true. But life won’t give them to you. Only you can make them happen. Start now. Set the date. Get ready, and before you know it, you’ll be there. They say that when we’re dying it’s not the things we’ve done that we regret, but the things we didn’t do. Let’s do everything we want to do instead of just dream about them. It’s great to dream. But living the dream is even better. Let’s live all the dreams we can. Today is the best time to start.

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