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Keeping Score

28 Aug

As we go through our lives we have many opportunities to serve others and help out.  Most of us want to help when we can and try to be available to those who need us.  Serving those around us brings great satisfaction and joy, but there may be times when we feel we’re giving too much or others are taking advantage.  If the same people call on us over and over again for things they should be managing themselves we may begin to feel we’re being used.  We can always decline any request but there are sometimes complications in our relationships or associations that make saying no more difficult.  If we feel we’ve been taken advantage of or manipulated because of relationship constraints, we might decide we deserve something in return and begin to keep score tallying up what we’ve given and what we’ve received.  If we find we’ve given much more than has been reciprocated it may affect how we feel about the other party and what we’re willing to do going forward.  It’s important to have balance in our lives and if we’re doing things that bring us discomfort we may certainly stop.  But we are responsible for the decisions we make and if we allow others to abuse our generosity we can stop.  We don’t have to keep track of how much we’ve given, or how many times we’ve agreed to help.  If we feel we’ve given all we can, we can say no when the next request comes.  We never have to do more than we are comfortable with and choosing what is fair and best for us going forward will bring us peace and confidence.  It’s better to manage our decisions with those around us than to give more than we want and lose our connection.  We know what’s best and we know what we can do.  Taking control and choosing wisely will allow us to be helpful without giving too much.

Some people have trouble managing their lives.  They may make decisions that bring complications into their lives and get overwhelmed when things go wrong.  We’re all responsible for the lives we live and can create them any way we choose.  If we are careless and foolish, and make choices that bring us hardship, we are responsible for the situations that arise.  We cannot push the burden of cleaning up a problem we’ve created onto someone else.  Our choices belong to us and the results of those choices are our responsibility.  We can change our lives any time we want.  We don’t need to rely on others continually to show us the way.  We have all the wisdom and intelligence we need to make good decisions and walk the path we desire most.

It’s good to ask for advice when we need it and we may certainly seek out those who may help us when we get stuck.  But if we fall into the habit of constantly asking others to help us solve our problems we may forget we are capable of solving many of them on our own.  We can resolve even complex and difficult issues if we take the time we need to evaluate them and choose our way forward.  It’s fine to seek help when we need it but we can also learn to be self-reliant and trust that we’ll find the answers.  There really isn’t anything too difficult for us to manage.  We have incredible insight and great wisdom from which to draw and all the answers are there for us.

Today if you’ve been asked to help again and feel you may be giving too much, evaluate the situation objectively and make the best choice before you proceed.  You are in control of your life and can manage it any way you choose.  If you’re stuck and feel like you need help to find answers, seek it, but remember you already know what you want to do and have all the courage and wisdom you need to proceed.  You are amazing and wise.  There isn’t anything you can’t do.  Be courageous.  You have everything you need to succeed.

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Learning

22 Aug

“We could never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world.”  Helen Keller

Life is filled with ups and downs, successes and failures, joy and disappointment and endless diverse experiences.  Nobody wants to suffer needlessly and we may imagine we would be happiest if our lives always went well and nothing ever failed.  It’s easy to be happy when things go the way we want them to and we have enough of everything we need.  But life is all about learning and it’s impossible to understand what true happiness is if we never struggle.  Joy is defined as the absence of sorrow.  In order to truly feel joy we must have some understanding of what it’s like to feel sorrow.  There would be no reason to be courageous if everything was easy and no need to be patient if all we wanted was immediately provided, but that is rarely the case.  We have the opportunity to experience disappointments and challenges that teach us new ways to see things and help us understand ourselves and the world.  Every obstacle has something to teach us and as we push forward we learn everything we need to find success and true happiness.  Life isn’t always easy but it is always precious and every single day, no matter what we face, is a gift.  We have everything we need to understand what is required to continue forward and we can overcome any problem or complication we face.  Each day we persevere we become stronger and wiser, and gain a better understanding of who we are and how to live happily.

We are strong and capable and even during times of serious struggle and challenge we can find a way through.  We can exercise patience and take problems apart piece by piece until we figure out how to proceed.  If the situation is very difficult we can take our time to discern what needs to be done.  Every turn and challenge teaches us something new and all the skills we learn stay with us.  We may draw on all the lessons we conquer as we move ahead.  There isn’t anything we can’t do and nothing we can’t overcome.  Taking our time and being confident will help us solve any issue before us and move us forward successfully.

We may dream of a perfect life where everything is easy and we have all we want and need.  But life is messy, there are other people making decisions that may affect us, there is traffic, bad weather, and countless other things that complicate our vision of a perfect existence.  It’s good to learn new things and test our strength and courage.  We can learn to be patient while we wait and endure while we struggle.  Testing our courage will bring us confidence and overcoming trials will bring us joy.  Life is a great blessing and we have everything we need to live successfully.

Today if you wish a problem before you would simply disappear, you have everything you need to navigate through and find joy.  You are strong and capable and nothing is too difficult for you to overcome.  Learn all you can and go forward with confidence.

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Breaking it Down

16 Aug

As we push through challenges in our lives and move forward we learn a lot about who we are and how the world works.  Not every problem is easy to solve and sometimes we may be in situations that are so complex and difficult we may not see the way through.  We may feel the answers are beyond us or too far to reach, and become discouraged.  We may stop in our tracks and decide we can’t go forward.  Unresolved problems don’t go away on their own.  They will inevitably reappear demanding our attention.  Although they may sit dormant for a while they will not disappear, no matter how much we wish they would.  If we are overwhelmed by something and unsure about how to solve it we can break it down.  If we want to run a marathon we don’t start by running all 26.2 miles the first day.  We begin with one mile and then day by day add more distance to our practice.  Instead of seeing the entire 26.2 miles we can work on running one mile 26.2 times in a row.  Step by step and mile by mile we’ll reach the destination.  There is nothing we can’t accomplish if we continue to move ahead and keep our eyes focused on the goal.  Even the most difficult of challenges will be overcome by breaking it down piece by piece and solving each step along the way.  We have everything we need to manage anything that comes and we are smart enough and wise enough to find our way through.

There may be times when our lives unexpectedly change and suddenly everything is foreign and unknown.  It may seem the world has turned upside down and everything we thought we could count on has disappeared.  Change is a constant and we cannot predict what will come to us, but we can trust in our ability to navigate even the most difficult of challenges.  When the bottom falls out and we’re struggling to find something to hold on to we can remember how strong we are and how many trials we’ve already succeeded in solving.  We have enough courage and wisdom to get through whatever we must face and nothing is strong enough to overcome us.

No matter where we are in life we can set any goal we choose.  We can completely change our lives and our circumstances if we want to move in a new direction.  If we want to change in any way we can be successful by planning our way forward and doing everything that is needed to reach the goal.  Nothing can hold us where we are if we want to move.  We have everything we need to overcome any obstacle no matter how great, and we can have the lives we want most.  There is nothing out of reach and every dream can become reality.

Today if you’re facing a big challenge and you aren’t sure you can manage it, remember you have everything you need to overcome anything.  You are strong enough to handle any difficulty and smart enough to solve any problem.  The world belongs to you and there is nothing out of reach.  Break the situation down and see all the options available to you.  The answers are there and you will find them.  Success is just ahead and you will reach it.

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Setting it Down

11 Aug

We have a lot of different experiences as we travel through our lives.  Sometimes they are good and happy, and other times we face trials and challenges.  If we are struggling with something and it’s weighing on us, it may affect many facets of our lives.  We may feel oppressed, worried, sad, or unsure and not as confident as we could be.  Life can be difficult at times and we may feel weary as we try to understand our situation and decide our next step forward.  We can carry anything and are certainly strong enough and wise enough to manage whatever comes to us, but if we need a break we can set our trouble down.  We can stop, take a deep breath and mentally set the trial down beside us.  We can let it go for a while and take a break.  There is comfort in stepping away for a time and whatever we’ve been carrying will be there when we’re ready to pick it back up again.  We don’t have to rush to find answers, we don’t have to face everything at once and we don’t have solve every problem today.  If we are overwhelmed and need respite we can take it.  Setting our troubles down for a time isn’t escaping them, it isn’t running away and it isn’t denying them.  It’s merely a time to take a breath and step away for a moment to clear our thoughts and find rest.  We are in complete control of our lives.  We can do things our way and we have everything we need to be successful at whatever we face.  Taking a break will refresh us and help clear our perceptions to find the way forward.

There may expectations from those around us to push through complications quickly and find correct answers fast.  We may feel pressed to rush through problems and move on to the next task.  Hurrying may well get us through a situation but in our haste we may make choices that fix things temporarily but don’t solve the problem completely.  When that happens the issues may reappear later or become a continual annoyance.  It’s far better to take the time we need to see all our options carefully and choose the solution that solves the problem completely.  Then we can move forward leaving it behind confident we did our best.

When we have several things bothering us at the same time it can feel like we’ll never solve them all.  But we can face each situation on its own and find one answer at a time.  We don’t have to solve everything at once.  We can handle things effectively by seeing each problem clearly and taking the time we need to find the best solution going forward.  Life is all about learning and there really isn’t anything too complex for us to figure out or too difficult for us to manage.  We have everything we need to do anything we choose.  Success is always there for us and with patience and planning we will gain it.

Today if you are beset by problems and complications, and feel unsure about how to proceed, set them down for a moment.  Give yourself a space to breathe and let yourself think.  You will find all the answers you need.  You are amazing and capable.  Nothing is too difficult for you.  Take a breath and then take a step forward.  Success is right there for you.

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Broken or Blessed

4 Aug

Relationships are important to all of us.  When we have a healthy and strong network of family and friends around us we feel supported and cared for.  Relationships come in all varieties and when they are good for us they are blessings in our lives.  But sometimes we may develop a relationship with someone who doesn’t have our best interests at heart.  Perhaps they are dysfunctional in their own lives and use us to fill in the gaps and missing pieces they experience within themselves.  Or maybe they see us as a stepping stone to something better.  Sometimes they may manipulate us into believing they care for us when they don’t or convince us to trust them in ways that work against us.  If they need more than we’re comfortable giving or have problems that interfere with our happiness it will be impossible for us to continue.  We don’t have to end any relationship that is important to us but if it’s hurting us we can find ways to manage it that ensure we’re comfortable and safe.  If a relationship is too difficult it may break and we may have to walk away.  Our personal happiness and safety are important and if we’re in a relationship that hurts us or makes us feel unsure we can change our involvement.  There are all kinds of people in the world and some need more than we can give.  We don’t have to continue in any situation that doesn’t work.  We can choose a new path at any time and are in complete control of our lives.  We know ourselves and know what is best for us.  Taking control and choosing the best road forward will bring us happiness and peace.

Perception is reality and sometimes our perception of an issue may be different than someone else’s.  What is acceptable and appropriate for one person may be offensive and unwelcome to another.  If we develop a relationship with someone whose ideas about what is right differ from ours, there will likely be conflict.  It may be possible to find a compromise but if the differences are extreme and feelings are strong it may become unworkable.  If we’re involved with someone whose personal values are far different than ours we may need to step back.  We deserve to be happy and choose to live our lives according to our personal standards.  We need not compromise what is most important to us.

There are few things more rewarding than a loving relationship with someone who respects us and treats us with kindness.  We feel strong when we’re with them and confident going forward knowing they have our backs and we can count on them for support.  Sharing our lives with someone who understands us and cares for us is a great blessing.  We can have any kind of relationships we desire.  We know what we want and what we need, and if we choose well we will be happy.

Today if you’re struggling with a relationship that brings you pain and frustration, consider all your options going forward.  You are in control of your life and you deserve every happiness.  Make choices today that will bring you comfort and joy.  You know what you need and you know what to do.  Be confident.  You have everything you need to have the life you desire.

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