Archive | May, 2016

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24 May

Life brings us a lot of different experiences. Some are happy, some sad, things go well and then not so well, disappointments and victories come, and with each experience we learn something more about ourselves, our lives, and those around us. As we change we carry information forward from what we’ve learned. Those lessons help us understand more about who we are and what we want, but they may also color the way we perceive things. For instance, if we have a very bad experience with a dog, we may fear or hate all dogs going forward. Or if something painful happens to us in a specific situation, we may avoid all similar situations in the future. It’s good to learn from our experiences but if they create filters that restrict our lives we may miss out on opportunities available to us. If we learn as we go without fear or avoidance, we will be more successful in living fully and embracing our lives completely. We can’t predict the future but the odds of repeating an exact experience going forward is unlikely. Allowing one bad or uncomfortable situation to color our lives indefinitely may keep us locked down and unable to see everything available to us. We can navigate difficult experiences, learn from them, and then move on. This life is all about change. We don’t have to hold onto anything that holds us back.

Sometimes we have pre-conceived ideas about things based on what we’ve seen in the past or what we’ve been taught. The problem with assuming is that we’re often wrong in the assumption. If we decide something is round because it was round before, and we’ve heard it’s round but never seen it, we may proceed accepting that as truth even if what we’re looking at is a square. Our minds can play tricks on us if we let them and we can be convinced of something that isn’t real because of where we’ve been or what we’ve seen in the past. If we can set our personal experiences aside and look at our situations objectively and openly, we may find that things are completely different than what we first imagined they would be. Learning to see things as they really are will open our lives up to new possibilities for growth and understanding, but we must be willing to see clearly and accept what is real.

It’s wise to protect ourselves from situations we believe will hurt us or make our lives difficult. And there is nothing wrong with pro-actively trying to be in the best place we can. But if we lock the doors around us because we are afraid from a previous experience, or we aren’t sure we can manage whatever is locked behind them, we may be protected from possible pain but we may also prevent possible happiness. If we filter our possibilities because we are unsure or afraid, we also filter any benefits that may come to us. It takes courage to step out of our comfort zones and take a chance, but we have sufficient courage to do anything we want. We are able to make excellent decisions and brave enough to move forward. Life teaches us a lot and we can do everything we need to be successful and happy. There isn’t anything we can’t manage and we can open all the doors in front of us.

Today if you’ve been holding back because of experiences in the past and you aren’t sure about going forward, remember you can do anything. Open all the doors. There is nothing you can’t handle. Be confident. You have everything you need to be successful and happy.

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Making it Better

23 May

Everywhere we go and with everything we do, we leave an impression that we were there.  People remember us and the things we do, we impact our surroundings in different ways, and there is no way to prevent leaving evidence of our presence behind.  We change our environment every time we are part of it.  Sometimes the marks we leave are clearly evident and sometimes they are small but they will always be there.  We have a choice therefore, to either leave behind something negative or something positive.  If we don’t care or don’t pay attention as we go through our lives, our impact may not always be the positive influence we may want it to be.  But if we tune in and remember that everything we do changes something, we can leave each situation a little better.  Even if all we do is have a positive attitude as we attend to our responsibilities we may lift those around us.  There is no way to be invisible and no matter what we do, it will make some kind of difference.  Making that difference better helps everyone around us and makes our days a little easier.

Everybody has a bad day from time to time.  Maybe we don’t feel well, or we have pressures on us that are complicating our lives, or the weather is making our day difficult, or a thousand other things.  If we let our discomfort define how we act it can make things worse.  If we’re grumpy and pass that on to others, our interactions with them may be more difficult.  If we don’t feel well and ignore those who come into our circle, we may make a negative impact on them.  Things go wrong and we all have times when we don’t feel happy or at our best.  But we don’t have to share our bad fortune with those around us.  If we need time alone to get through our situation, we should take it.  If we need rest we should make sure we get it.  And if we must interact when we aren’t at our best, we can remember the issue is ours and doesn’t need to become everyone else’s.

We can’t control what comes to us but we can control our response to it.  If something uncomfortable is going on we can display that discomfort to everyone around us, or we can choose to be positive despite it.  That doesn’t mean being dishonest with our feelings or pretending things are great when they aren’t.  It just means managing our response in ways that don’t accentuate the negative situation we’re dealing with and remembering that no matter what we’re facing we’ll get through it.  Even if what we’re going through feels like the end of the world, in time we’ll move on to something better.  If we focus on the big picture and trust ourselves we will face our challenges more confidently and positively.  If we choose to be an example of grace, patience, endurance, and peace even when we’re working out a problem, our influence on those around us will be positive and uplifting.  Everything we do will make a difference.  We can make that difference a benefit and be a blessing.

Today if you’re feeling down or angry or upset or frustrated or whatever, and not at your best, remember you can manage anything that comes to you.  You have a lot of influence over those around you.  You’re going to touch a lot of people every day.  Let that touch be kind, loving, and patient.  Your consideration will return to you over and over and everyone, including you, will be happier because of it.

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Mount Everest

19 May

When someone decides they want to climb Mount Everest, it takes a long time to prepare. They must have a lot of experience climbing other peaks before they attempt such an arduous journey, and they must be in top physical condition. Before they go they have to be sure they can manage the physical requirements that will be placed on them by enduring other similar experiences. The climb to the top will be long and difficult and the weather is always unpredictable. Additionally, they will need to interact with others in a way that will ensure their safety and support. It’s a big challenge and a serious decision. Going unprepared or unwilling to do what is needed could mean extreme danger or even the loss of life. Climbers sometimes prepare for years for this challenge, and even then sometimes don’t succeed on getting to the summit. It pushes them to their limit but the only way to know if they can do it is to try. And so they climb.

We may never choose to climb Mount Everest or any other mountain. But we will face extreme challenges in our lives that will push us to our limits and make us question our abilities. They may be physical challenges but often are other types of situations. We will all face big decisions, major disappointments, and changes in our lives that may make us question our ability to overcome or at times, even survive. Things don’t always go the way we want them to or even the way we think they will. And when there’s an unexpected ringer, something that rocks us to our core, something so disappointing or unexpectedly difficult we may, at first, believe we won’t find our way through. But no problem is so devastating that we can’t manage it. There is no change so pervasive that we can’t navigate it. If we trust ourselves, and lean on our proven capabilities, we will find our way.

There is really no way to prepare for the unexpected. We can try to live our lives to help us become strong, independent people capable of doing many things. And we will be tested time and again with problems and challenges, some big and some small. Every time we sort through an issue and find an answer, every time we push through a problem and get to the resolution, our skills for managing the unexpected are refined. Each day brings something new and as we face each situation, good or bad, we learn. It’s like preparing to climb a mountain. We carry a lot of weight that makes us strong, we make decisions that teach us how to proceed, and we keep moving forward and improve our endurance. This life is a journey. Every turn will bring something new. We have everything we need to face whatever comes and we can reach the summit every time.

Today if you’re facing a big challenge and it feels like you’re climbing Mount Everest, and if you’re struggling to keep going, dig deep. You have resources you’ve refined over time inside you ready to come forward to help you find your way. No matter how far the summit is, you will get there. You already have everything you need. There isn’t anything too big for you to handle. Keep pushing forward and the answers will come.

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No Return

17 May

Sometimes things happen to us that are unfixable. Sometimes relationships end suddenly, sometimes we face a detour so extreme our lives are altered going forward, and sometimes everything we thought was real goes up in smoke. Some problems may alter our destination forever and break our momentum for a time. We can’t prevent all the bad things that may happen to us but we can get through whatever comes. But getting through a difficult development and trying to fix what’s been broken are two different things. There will be times in everyone’s life when something changes everything and there is no going back. We can never return to where we were. It can be hard to navigate times like those, and we have to take it step by step. Accepting what we thought we had or what we hoped we’d find will never come is very difficult. However, no matter how hard the situation is we can face it. No matter how complicated it becomes we can manage it. And no matter how devastated we feel, we will move through it. There isn’t anything strong enough to stop us forever. We may get stalled for a time but we will find our way again and figure out how to go forward.

Some people love surprises. The unexpected is delightful to them and they love the thrill of not knowing. For others, surprises are unpleasant and they prefer to know what’s happening and where they’re headed at all times. No matter what we like, unexpected bad news is never welcome. We all try our best to plan for happiness and peace as we move along, and when those plans work for us we feel content and settled. Things move along as we want them to and nobody is rocking the boat. But when the water gets high and suddenly the boat is leaking, it can fill quickly and leave us panicked trying to figure out what to do. There is no guarantee in anyone’s life that things will go well. We can plan, we can try, and we can do everything in our power to ensure a safe journey. When unexpected complications come we must find a way through them if we want to succeed.

When things go wrong and everything changes we can feel overwhelmed and lost, especially if the problem is serious and threatening. We can lose our footing and feel like we’re going under. We may need time to find our way again, and we may need to change things in our lives in order to move forward. There is nothing wrong with modifying our plans but that can be painful and the pain can paralyze us. If we remember this is just a passage and not a destination, we will find more confidence to move forward. Nothing is permanent in our lives. Everything changes and no matter what problems we’re facing, no matter how invasive and frightening they are, they will not last forever. We will move through them and they will pass. We have all the courage we need to face anything and all the inspiration we need to find our way. We can keep moving forward even if our destination has changed. We can slog through the deep mud and find our way back to solid ground.

Today if you’re facing a serious setback or a complication that has changed where you’re headed, have faith. You will find your way. The road is still there beneath your feet. You can keep walking forward. Turn a little and adjust your course. You have everything you need to conquer whatever you’re facing. There is nothing too big for you to handle. Keep moving forward. The answers are there and you’ll find them.

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Finding Ourselves

16 May

Learning who we are and what we want seems like an easy thing to do.  After all, we’re the only ones living inside our own heads.  But the complications of living in a world filled with others and their opinions and expectations, can muddy the waters.  We learn as we go and each day we discover something new about ourselves.  As we grow, we change and how we see ourselves changes as well.  They say it isn’t until we’re lost that we begin to find ourselves.  When we get lost and all the things we thought we could count on aren’t available, if our direction is spinning around and we feel untethered, we have only ourselves to rely on.  And when that happens, we learn who we really are.  When it’s just us and nobody else, when the light is dim and it’s hard to find our way, we must pull from resources inside us.  And when we do we find out how strong and capable we are, and we begin to understand how much we can really do.  Discovering who we really are and living a genuine life are great blessings that will bring us comfort, courage, and confidence.

This life is filled with signs and directions.  Go here, go there, do this, do that, stop, go, wait, it’s endless.  Everyone has an opinion about what we should do.  Some of those opinions mean a lot, and some of it is just noise created by our societal norms.  If we take a road trip and follow every sign we see, take every exit and every turn, all we’ll do is drive from place to place with no final destination.  Our lives are the same way.  If we don’t have a plan for our destination, if we don’t know what we want to do, and if we have no idea where we’re headed, we’ll end up spending our days going places but landing nowhere.

We don’t always have to get lost to figure out who we are and what we want, but we will have to pay attention.  Instead of going along with everything we encounter, we can take a moment and decide if it’s something we really want to do.  Instead of acting a certain way because it’s what’s expected, we can be genuinely who we are.  Our lives are in our control.  We can decide to do anything with them we choose.  But we have to make the choices if we want them to be ours.  We can go anywhere we want to go, but we have to take the journey.  We can be anything we want to be, but we have to do what’s needed for that to become reality.  It’s all in our power.  The only thing stopping us from doing it our way, is us.  We have sufficient courage and determination to create the lives we want.  Our lives can be a true reflection of who we are, and when they are, we find real happiness.

Today if you feel like you’re not moving forward the way you want to and you’re staying busy but feel stuck, think about what you want.  Think about who you really are and then begin to live your life the way that fits you best.  You are a gift to the world.  There has never been, nor will there ever be anyone else like you.  Be genuine.  Be yourself and share that uniqueness.  The world is better because you’re here.  Find yourself and you’ll find real happiness.

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