Archive | November, 2015

Walking a Tightrope

24 Nov

Our lives can sometimes get quite complicated. Perhaps our personal relationships are strained and we are unsure of how to go forward. Maybe our jobs have changed and expectations are now higher than we’re comfortable. Or perhaps our financial situation has shifted and made planning more difficult. When we’re in situations that are stressful and precarious, and we’re trying to figure out how to navigate them, it can feel like we’re walking on a tightrope. One quick turn the wrong way and we could fall. It’s unsettling when things aren’t stable or are more difficult than we feel we can tolerate. But tolerate them we must until they change. The wire may wobble as we try to move forward. We may feel unsettled or nervous, but with patience and care we can keep our balance, even if the ground is far below us. Instead of looking down and imagining the fall, we can keep our eyes trained ahead and take a step forward.

When we’re struggling to find our footing, it’s helpful to take things more slowly. If we take a little more time with our decisions and think about them a bit longer, we may be more successful. Running full speed is great when we’re on firm soil, but when we’re suspended in doubt and uncertainty, it’s helpful to go a little slower. Unless we’re facing a deadline of some sort, we may take as much time as we need to figure things out. The important thing isn’t how fast we find the answers, but to reach the right ones so we can gain a firmer foundation. Before we take a step in any direction we need to be sure there is enough rope to hold us. If there is, we can move forward. If not, we need to ponder the situation a little longer and find the answer that works. We can make excellent decisions if we give ourselves the time and consideration we need.

In order to move ahead when we’re in precarious situations it’s important to focus on the end goal. We need to visualize where we want to go and see it clearly in front of us. It’s impossible to navigate difficult situations effectively if we have no idea where we want to end up. Once we have our direction, we can plan our steps going forward. We may stumble, the ground might shake, and the wire may twist a little, but if we focus we can regain our balance and begin again. Slowly moving forward we can hang on through the fog and find our way. There isn’t anything we can’t figure out. Step by step, watching carefully, we can navigate even the most difficult of challenges and succeed.

Today if you’re in a complicated situation and you feel unsure, take your time. Stop for a moment to regroup and see where you need to go. Let yourself have time to think and you’ll find your way. There isn’t anything you can’t conquer. There is nothing you can’t do. See the destination before you and begin going forward. You’ll reach it at the right time and everything will be strong again.

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Pave the Road

23 Nov

As we go through our lives we all have dreams and hopes for things we’d like to happen. But we get busy with everyday responsibilities and those things can get pushed back. Sometimes our lives interfere with our plans, and before we know it, days, weeks, months, even years can slip by and we find ourselves wondering how we got so far down the road and didn’t do what we intended to do. If we aren’t careful we may find ourselves living our entire lives and never accomplishing things we wanted to do. But if we are aware and focus on where we want to go, even if it means we have to wait a while, we can make sure we do everything. We can, even when we’re busy, set things in motion that will ensure we do what’s important to us.  We can begin to the pave the road before we’re ready to walk on it.

Paving a road takes several steps.  First the old pavement must be removed.  Once that’s done a base is laid as a foundation.  Finally the smooth finished layer is applied.  We can pave our personal roads in the same way.  First we may need to remove old patterns or behaviors that will allow us to begin.  Even if we’re busy doing other things we can work on that a little every day.  If what we want to do requires a skill we don’t yet have, we can prepare the foundation by doing what is needed to gain it. Perhaps a course of study is required, or someone to tutor us in the new skill.  Maybe what we want to learn can be gained by researching on our own.  Whatever it takes, once we’ve attained the new skills needed our base is ready, and we are prepared.  We can then go forward and make the change and achieve the goal by applying ourselves.

Learning new patterns, planning for change, and implementing new behaviors require time and effort. There is an old saying that anything worth doing is worth doing well. If we want to bring some effective change into our lives, we must plan to do it the best we can. Our dreams are never mediocre. When we dream of success in anything, we dream we’ll be great at it. Nobody hopes for average performance. When we want something more, something different, or something we yearn for, we want to do it well and master it. If we plan, and remember every single day where we want to go, we can pave the road.  When we’re prepared and ready we’ll reach the goal. We can do anything we want to do. There isn’t anything too difficult or too big for us. If we plan for it, if we prepare, and if we are consistent, we can achieve anything.

Today if you’ve been dreaming of a change you want to make but have been stuck, do one thing that will help you get closer to it. Begin to prepare, start the foundation, and focus on the goal. Be diligent and consistent in moving forward and you will not only succeed, but will master the task and be triumphant. You can do anything. There is nothing that can stop you. Open the door. You can see the road you want to be on.  Start paving.

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Modification

21 Nov

There are times in our lives when we may find the road we’re on isn’t taking us where we thought it would. The signs are there, we can see we aren’t moving forward, and we may end up further from the goal than when we started. It seems the logical thing to do at a time like that is to adjust our trajectory to one that takes us closer to where we want to go. However, if we are convinced the path we’ve chosen is right, and believe that if we just keep going we’ll eventually succeed, we may stay the course. We’ve probably all heard the definition of insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. It’s the same thing if we know something isn’t working but keep pushing forward thinking it will change. We may not be crazy, but the idea that continuing on the same incorrect course will magically change it into one that works isn’t logical. And it certainly won’t help us get to our destination.

When we are confident in our decisions, whatever they are, and proceed forward, we expect things to work out as planned. We foresee that we’ll get from point A to point B by using the plan we’ve created and the path we’ve chosen. If we hit a few snags at the beginning we may overlook them and continue on. If we continue to falter we may think it’s just a matter of time or working a bit harder to be successful. But eventually if we see we aren’t going anywhere, and despite working harder at the problem nothing is changing, we need to stop and reconsider. It never works to keep moving forward or pushing harder if we’re going the wrong way. We may struggle with admitting our plan isn’t working but ignoring the facts will only prevent us from gaining success. If we want to achieve the goal, and what we’re doing isn’t working, it’s time to reorganize, rethink, and make a new plan.

It’s good to be confident, and we are capable of making excellent decisions. But nobody is perfect and sometimes things don’t work out with the methods we’ve chosen. There is nothing wrong with revising our plans. If we need to, it’s wise to adjust our course and retool going forward. But if we’re so sure we’re right and choose our opinion over doing what is needed to succeed, all we’ll have in the end is our opinion. We can win if we humble ourselves enough to accept the need to change and then do what is required to make success possible. After all, success is the goal – not the process to get there.

Today if you’ve been pushing and pushing and nothing is changing or you find you’re going in the wrong direction, stop and look at the situation again. Be open to adjusting your course and the answers will come. Start again, and make changes as they are needed. You will achieve your goal and you’ll be successful. You have everything you need to win. Be flexible and you’ll get there.

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The Simple Life

20 Nov

In this day and age, there are thousands of things that capture our attention. There are limitless websites we can visit to see and learn new things, thousands of items we can purchase, endless places to travel to, and an ongoing barrage of information flowing in. We can spend our time involved in innumerable ventures and activities. Many of them are valuable, but there are a lot of good, but worthless, time takers that can eat up our lives. It’s easy to get caught up in all that’s available, and if we aren’t careful we can spend our days reading about and watching how others live their lives, and neglect to actually live our own. Every moment we live is expendable. Once it’s gone we can never get it back. Therefore, it seems wise to spend them in ways that will enhance our experiences and give us the most in return.

Leonardo da Vinci said, “Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” If that’s true then all the time we spend complicating our lives with information and activity may keep us from becoming exactly what we’re seeking. Learning to live a simple life can bring us more free time, and allow us to enjoy each day without the constant need to be busy. These days it seems we’re expected to be constantly working on something, or engaged in an activity. But if we’re always busy we have no time for thought, or reflection. And if we continually jump from one action to the next and never leave any down time, we may burn ourselves out. Our days will fly by and because of our activity level we may not remember what we spent our time doing. Learning to simplify our days can help us learn more about life and about ourselves, and may improve our physical and mental health.

When we spend our time engaged in anything, we are, in fact, spending our time. We are exchanging it for the benefit of whatever activity we’re engaged in. Like money, once it leaves our hands, it’s gone. But our time can never be re-earned or replaced. Once it’s gone, it’s gone for good. If we think more carefully about how we want to use it, and are judicious in giving it away to things that mean little, we will feel more gratified and satisfied when the day is over. Instead of getting lost in our computer searches, and spinning our wheels doing things that take us nowhere, we can choose to consciously decide how our minutes and hours will be used. And if we do, our lives will be richer and more meaningful, and we’ll remember each day is a gift.

Today if you’ve been caught up in all the information and activities around you, if you’ve lost time doing things that haven’t returned anything positive back to you, take control. Determine how you’ll spend your time more effectively. Make careful choices regarding it and you’ll be happier with what you’re doing, more relaxed going forward, and nothing will steal your focus from your goals. Today be in charge of your life, and your time spent will return good things back to you.

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Lies, Lies, and More Lies

19 Nov

We can say anything we want about anyone or any situation. We can make up stories about our lives, our successes, our families, our history, or anything else we want to. We can tell people we care about them when we don’t, tell others we’ll call them when we have no intention of doing so, or anything else that pops into mind. There is no truth police except our own conscience and if we ignore that and don’t care about ethics or morality, we can create any sort of life we want to by lying. Some people think there are degrees of lying and it’s okay to tell them if they don’t mean much or don’t hurt others. For instance, if we get invited to a party and don’t want to attend, we could say we have another commitment, even if we don’t. Then we don’t have to go to the party, and the host isn’t hurt because we made up a plausible excuse. Some call those “white lies.” But whatever color we call it, it’s still a lie. And once we’re caught in one, which will inevitably happen, we lose the trust of those around us. Nobody can believe a liar. Nobody will even try.

Instead of telling lies outright, we can do it in obscure and ambiguous ways. We could create confusion and misdirection to mask what is really going on. Although we aren’t outright lying to the other party, we are doing things to keep the truth from them. What about when we tell lies to protect others? If we care about someone but know we can’t commit to the serious relationship they want, we could lead them on and hope that eventually they’ll figure things out on their own. That way we don’t have to tell the painful truth, and they’ll be happy at least for a while. We aren’t really lying with words, but we’re deceiving them just the same. Whether we speak them or live them, lies damage our credibility and our self respect. And will eventually damage our relationships with others.

Is it imperative to be honest in all things? Are there exceptions to the rule? We all have to make personal judgment calls in every decision. But telling lies and living dishonestly complicates our lives. We must remember exactly what we’ve said, who we’ve told, and what we’ve done. Since it’s all fiction, we have to keep our stories straight, which can take a lot of energy and planning if we’ve been lying for a while. It’s far easier and simpler in the long run to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Even if we’ve done something embarrassing or hurtful, it’s best to own up to it and face the music. No dance lasts forever, and no matter what we’ve done we will move through it. Determining to be honest in every interaction will free us from guilt and shame, and the difficulty of untangling lies. People will respect our honesty, honor our integrity, and trust us implicitly. And having the trust of others is a great blessing.

Today if you’ve gotten tangled up in a dishonest situation, you can straighten things out by telling the truth. No matter what has happened already, clear the way by being completely honest going forward. Those around you will learn they can trust you and be glad to interact with you. You are worth more than you can imagine. Honor your value by being as honest as possible. Let others believe you, and depend on you, and be the gift you were designed to be.

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