Tag Archives: Solve

The Gift

8 Aug

We have all kinds of responsibilities and tasks to get done. Some are routine and we’re used to managing them, but other stuff comes up and if we’re facing something difficult or unpleasant, we may put it off and try to avoid it. We don’t want to look at it, we don’t want to deal with it, and we would love someone else to volunteer to take it off our hands. When we have a lot to carry, it would be very convenient to hand everything that’s weighing on us over to someone else and walk away. Just leave it with them and let them deal with it. We can try that and we might be able to get rid of a few things but nobody is going to forget the little gift we gave them, and in time, they may bring us an even bigger one to deal with in return. Fair is fair, and if we expect others to take care of our crap, we have to be willing to take care of theirs. Since there is no way to know how big their issues might be, it’s better to stand firm, and manage the issues we have on our own. It doesn’t usually work to push our problems off on others but that doesn’t mean others won’t try to push their troublesome tasks off onto us. If we’re open and welcoming, they may simply hand them off and ask us to take care of them. We might be okay with that once in a while, but if it becomes habit, it might seriously impact our time and our relationship. Everyone is responsible for their own lives and their own responsibilities. We don’t have to solve anyone else’s problems or carry their burdens for them. Our lives will bring us enough to manage, and if we manage it well, and take care of things as they arise, we will feel great satisfaction as we move forward. Our confidence will rise and we’ll find great success.

Some people need more attention and help than others. They may be unsure of their abilities, need more information, they may be confused, or they may just be lazy. Whatever the case, if we’re asked to help, we can certainly step up and try to assist. But helping with an issue isn’t taking ownership of it. The problem does not belong to us and we are never responsible for solving it. We can help where possible and offer any advice we may have, and allow those who own the problem to find the answers they need.

There are all kinds of problems and complications in life. Nobody can solve them all or save anyone else. We can take care of our own issues and, when possible, help those around us take care of theirs. We are strong enough for anything our life brings, and can solve any problem or face any trial that arises. If asked, we can help those around us, but we can never carry the load for everyone else. We can be considerate and try to assist, but the responsibility for the success of others lies with them. We can take care of our responsibilities, share when we can, and find great success and happiness moving forward.

Today if someone has asked you take on a problem that belongs to them, you need not agree. Be helpful, but let others manage their own issues, and give the gift of self-reliance. You are incredible and wise, and we’re all enriched by your presence. Set the best example moving forward and the whole world will benefit.

Doing it Right

11 Jul

When we’re trying to get something done and we encounter a complication that takes time and effort to navigate we have lots of choices we can make.  If we’re in a hurry to complete the task and don’t care how we get it done, we can push through whatever problems arise, focus only on our goal and rush forward.  If the goal is something we’ve worked toward for a long time and are tired of dealing with it we might ignore problems and go around them instead of solving them.  We can get to any goal any way we want to.  We can work problems and find the best solutions as we go or we can shove our way through in order to finish the task and move on.  If all we see is the finish line and pay no attention to how we get there we might take shortcuts to get there sooner but in the end neglecting details may cause us more headaches.  Doing the right thing isn’t always the easiest thing.  But if we do our best to completely address each situation and solve whatever problems arise as go our path will often be less complicated later.  It may take a little more time to tie up all the loose ends but left dangling and unsolved, problems have a way of circling back and tangling up our future plans.  They say a job worth doing is worth doing well, and that’s true.  If we effectively try to do our best as we go, the road will be easier and less complicated in the future.

Quick fixes are great.  We get in, do what absolutely has to be done now, and get out.  But the quick fix isn’t always the best option.  In the material world if we have something that’s broken and needs repair but we don’t have time, we might do something to hold it for now.  We know the fix won’t last forever and it’s just a patch until we can return and take care of the problem permanently.  In our personal lives we sometimes use quick fixes as well.  The problem with using quick fixes is our lives continue on and more things happen.  We have other situations to address and before we know it time has gone by and we haven’t returned to finish the situation we set aside.  If we do this continually our lives will be cluttered up with all kinds of problems that are half finished and half solved.  They’ll be in the back of our minds niggling at us to return and may chip away at our confidence because we haven’t completed them.

Most problems have a beginning when they arise, a middle as we process them and figure them out, and an end when we solve them.  Solving a problem is the only way to get rid of it.  It’s the only way to leave it behind and move ahead.  If we get stuck in the middle, and set it aside, the problem sits and waits for us to return.  Most problems don’t go away on their own.  They hang around until we decide to look at them and solve them.  While they wait, we carry them with us.  They weigh on us and may impact our ability to move forward.  It’s like dragging something heavy behind us as we try to step ahead.  We can keep our lives clear if we address our problems and do our best to resolve them when they appear so we can let them go and move on.

Today if you have unresolved issues that are weighing on you, choose to solve them and let them go.  You don’t need to drag them along with you.  You deserve to feel free and confident, and taking care of things now will give that to you.

Hiding Places

29 Feb

Life is full of challenges. We face some sort of challenge every day and sometimes they are difficult for us to manage. If they seem too hard we might decide that instead of facing them we’ll hide. There are limitless places to hide if we want to. If we have a relationship issue we don’t want to face, we can hide by working long hours so we’re unavailable to talk about it. If we don’t want to see someone, we may hide by creating unexpected complications that prevent us from meeting them.  We can hide in limitless ways when we don’t want to face something. But if we want to be the best we can be we have to be willing to face whatever comes to us. We are capable of managing anything we encounter but we may forget that if we’re threatened or afraid of the outcome.  But hiding never works. All it does is delay the inevitable, and trying to hide indefinitely is exhausting. The best we can do when things get difficult is determine to face them head on, no matter what comes. We’ll have to confront our problems at some point. It’s best to do it when they first appear because aren’t going away until we solve them. We are wise enough, brave enough, and smart enough to face whatever the issue is, and find an acceptable resolution.

Truth is truth and no matter what we do, it will always surface. Looking the other way or pretending it doesn’t exist changes nothing. Hiding from the truth only prevents us from moving forward. If we aren’t moving forward, we’re either standing still or going backward – neither of which will take us to our goals. When things go wrong, or we’re facing developments that are difficult, the only way to get through them is to face them squarely, figure them out, resolve them, and move on. It may be painful, but we are capable of managing pain. It might be complicated, but we’re smart enough to figure anything out, and it might take some time, but as we process the problem we’re moving forward through it. We can handle whatever it takes.

Nothing stays the same in life. Whatever we’re going through today will be different tomorrow. We can’t control the things that come to us but if we proactively face our problems and find workable solutions to them, we can move through them. Once we’ve solved them, we can let them go, and move forward. If we hide and obsess over them instead of facing them, we force ourselves to carry them longer than we must. Carrying problems around instead of solving them gets us nowhere, and can have a negative impact on our ability to be happy. We all deserve to be happy. By courageously facing our problems, and determining the wisest path going forward, we can solve them, and find our peace again. Happiness is a gift we give to ourselves. Refusing to hide even when things get hard allows us to return to happiness as quickly as possible.

Today if you’ve been hiding from something that has been difficult for you, do what you must to take the first step in solving the issue. There isn’t anything you can’t manage. You are strong enough and smart enough to face anything. Face the problem and solve it. Your happiness will return and you’ll feel more confident going forward. You can do anything. Today do your best to move forward.

Backing Up

27 Jun

Within our wide circle of acquaintances, friends, family, significant others, co-workers, and others we meet all kinds of people, and personalities. Some are easier for us to relate to than others, but each brings different types of behaviors to interact with. Sometimes we have interactions with people who struggle with various issues. Perhaps they have an anger problem, maybe they are shy, there may be substance abuse issues, or aggressive tendencies. Whatever we run into, when we are with them, we find ways to navigate whatever they’re going through. Because we care for one another, if someone has a particular problem that complicates things, we might feel we can help. It seems like the right thing to do to try to help.

Helping others is always noble. It’s generally a good decision, but some problems cannot be helped by others. We may find ourselves constantly working with someone over an issue, giving advice, trying hard to show them ways to work things out, but nothing changes. When they complain about the situation, we may offer suggestions, or try directing them to sources that may help. Because of our concern, over time we may find that we feel some ownership for their problem. We may get too involved in it, and try again, and again to make them see what we think will work.

True change never happens because someone tells us we need to change. It only happens when we decide we want to change. Nobody can do it for us, and the best advice in the world will go unheeded if we are not ready to receive it. When we are trying to help someone else, we must remember that. We cannot change anyone but ourselves. Despite our best intentions, we cannot make anyone see the light, and turn their lives. Even if the answer is plainly obvious to us, we cannot make anyone else see it. It has to come from them. The best thing we can do is to let them do it their way. If they come to us for advice, we may offer it, and then we need to let it go. Since it’s not our issue, we can’t solve it. We can be supportive, we can be caring and kind, but we cannot make anyone change anything in their lives. When they are ready, they will do it themselves.

Today if there is someone close to you that you’ve been trying so hard to help with an issue, remember all you can do is offer your support, your best advice, and your care. The problem is theirs to solve. You cannot fix it for them. They must work things out themselves. Be there for them. Be a true friend. When they reach for you, offer your hand, but let them make their own choices. You are valiant, and kind, to want to help. Continue to be there, but remember the problem is theirs to solve. They know you’re there. And being there for them is the best you can do.