Tag Archives: Manipulation

Sharpening Knives

6 Jan

The world is filled with all kinds of people. Many of those we meet are nice, often polite and helpful. But we’re all on different pages and some people may do things that offend, annoy or hurt us. Sometimes these things happen by accident but other times we may get tangled up with someone who does things against us on purpose for their own reasons. Maybe they’re jealous of us, or they think we’re a bit too confident and want to bring us down a notch. Maybe they’re unhappy and want us to suffer along with them. There’s no way to know why people do what they do unless they tell us, and when they’re in attack mode, chances are that won’t happen. We may build what we believe is friendship with someone who seems to like us, only to discover that the nice, gentle lamb we were dealing with was really a wolf. They may smile and agree when we are near but once we walk away, may begin sharpening the knife they plan to stick in our backs. It’s unproductive to live our lives under constant suspicion and paranoia that someone is out to get us, and we can trust others until they give us a reason not to. But it’s wise to keep our eyes open so we aren’t caught off guard. If we pay attention we’ll see cracks where things don’t add up and can do what is necessary to make sure we’re on solid ground. There are many great people in the world we can make wonderful connections and long lasting relationships with. By being wise and seeing everything openly we can avoid unwanted surprises and move forward with confidence.

Nobody knows everything or can read the future. We learn as we go and take all the knowledge we gain forward with us. We don’t have to touch a hot stove twice to know it will burn us. The same is true in our relationships. If someone hurts or manipulates us, they are telling us more about themselves. Of course, we all make mistakes but mistakes that are repeated again and again are personality patterns. We can trust our instincts and step away from any situation that isn’t working. We deserve complete happiness, and have everything necessary to achieve it.

It’s possible to be involved in a relationship with someone who is destructive and feel like there’s no way out. A long time relationship has it’s own dynamic and even if we’re desperately unhappy, we may remain because the unknown is intimidating. Our lives belong to us and we control every choice we make. We can choose unhappiness and despair, or we can decide to make a change. We are intelligent and capable, and when we’re ready, can do anything we desire.

Today if you feel unsure about something that’s happening, trust yourself. You never have to stay in any situation that makes you uncomfortable. Look at every option possible and step toward what you want the most. There isn’t anything you can’t do. You are a blessing to the world and bring great light. Be confident and sure. Every success is there for you and you will make them yours.

Making It Ours

14 May

Strong, healthy relationships embellish our lives. It’s good to build connections with others and share our lives with them, and when we do, we may find great comfort and satisfaction in their company. Most people are kind and welcoming, will value our friendship and association, and treat us with respect. But there are all kinds of people in the world, and we may get involved with someone who is unpredictable, unreliable, or dysfunctional. If we build relationships with them, and spend a lot of time interacting with them, they may create trouble and bring havoc into our lives. If we care for them, we may find ourselves excusing their bad behavior and even taking the blame for them when they act out. Making their issues ours will never fix the problem or bring us happiness. When we first get to know someone and they let us down, we may excuse it because we understand they’re struggling. As time goes by and they fail to follow through again and again, we may continue to give them additional chances and try to be patient. It’s noble to be patient with others but it’s not appropriate to constantly excuse bad behavior if it hurts us. We are valuable and should be cherished and treated with the utmost care and respect. If someone close to us continually breaks promises and leads us along time and again, it is appropriate to step away. Nothing can be gained by being constantly let down and hurt. We can be polite and kind, and let others own their problems by removing their negative influence from our lives. Dysfunctional relationships never work. We deserve complete happiness and can make decisions that will bring it to us. By valuing ourselves, we can step forward with confidence and choose the best roads moving forward. Happiness is there for us, and we have everything we need to reach it.

When we’ve been in a relationship for a long time, it may be hard to walk away even if we’re unhappy. We may feel the weight of history, friends and family may encourage us to tough it out and stay, and we may not want to hurt the other person’s feelings. A lot of things may come into play, but there are no valid reasons to stay in a relationship that isn’t working. Nothing is worth the price of our happiness. Changing direction and starting over isn’t simple, but we are smart enough and strong enough to change anything at any time.

Nobody knows the details of any relationship, but the parties involved. What people see on the outside is just a small representation of the whole picture. Our lives belong to us and we don’t need to feel compelled to explain any decision we make. We know what we want and have everything necessary to reach any goal. We are stronger and more powerful than we imagine and can do anything we desire. By trusting ourselves, and doing what is necessary to be happy, we will find great comfort and satisfaction.

Today if you’re not happy in your current situation, make a plan to change. The future is yours to design, and you deserve the best of everything. Be confident and trust yourself. Every single blessing is there for you. You are amazing and powerful, and every dream is waiting. Step forward on the road that will make them yours.

Here Ya Go

26 Mar

There are lots of people who come and go in and out of our lives. We make contacts and connections, build relationships, and interact with them continually. We may only wave in passing, or they may be important and integral to our daily lives. We’re all sharing time on the planet and each of us is experiencing our own personal events. It’s good to have others who support us when things go wrong to offer help and advice, and we can be there when someone else needs us. Our connections to one another run deeper than we think, and our presence may be all that’s needed to help someone over a trial. Everyone gets the opportunity to experience problems and trouble, and we all struggle from time to time. Our lives are our own responsibility but if we’re overwhelmed with something, and someone we trust and rely on shows up, we might try to transfer the issue over onto them. We may imagine that since they care about us, they won’t mind taking on the extra burden, and believe they could manage it better than we could anyway. We may say, “Here ya go,” pass it off to them, dust off our hands, and walk away. It’s nice to think others will willingly handle all our messy, difficult problems, but our lives belong to us, and our problems are our responsibility. We own them, even when we try to give them away. Nobody wants to face problems. Nobody wants to suffer, but this is real life, not fantasyland, and things are going to go wrong. It’s never convenient, it’s not fun and we don’t enjoy struggling, but that doesn’t mean we can’t manage the issue. We are stronger and wiser than we might think, and there isn’t anything so hard and complex we can’t figure it out. By trusting ourselves and taking things one step at a time, we will find our way through whatever comes. We are powerful and capable, and will succeed.

Guilt can be a very useful tool for manipulating others. If we’re asked to do something we don’t want to do, it may be used to get us to change our minds. They may remind us of when they helped us out of a jam, for which we were very grateful. There is always give and take in every relationship, but we’re in control of our lives. We never have to do anything we don’t want to do, and manipulation through infusing guilt into the equation, doesn’t change anything. We can be confident of our decisions, even if others disagree, and continue forward.

There may be times when we’re facing a very difficult problem and don’t know how to manage it. Instead of ignoring it and hoping it will magically disappear, or trying to find someone else who’ll take it, we can reach out for help and advice, and begin unraveling it ourselves. All the answers are there for us, and we are intelligent enough to find them. We can be confident we will prevail and push ahead toward resolution.

Today if you’re facing a difficult challenge and don’t know how to proceed, trust yourself. Ask for help and get the information and advice you need. You are more powerful than you realize, and nothing is too hard for you to manage. Be confident and stand strong. Every single blessing is there for you. Step forward and claim them.

Backhanded

13 Jan

We interact with a lot of people as we go through our lives. We build relationships, work along side them, and make connections through our shared experiences. Many people are sincere and open in their comments and conversations and we appreciate spending time with them. But there are others who don’t always say exactly what they mean, and instead use innuendo and make backhanded comments that leave us unsure as to what they mean or how they feel. If they are flippant or sarcastic, we might wonder if we’ve done something wrong, or if they don’t trust us for some reason. If we don’t speak clearly and state what we want, there will inevitably be confusion, and the road ahead will get cloudy. If we’re concerned about how our comments will make us look or feel superior to those around us, we may use double talk and insinuation instead of stating the facts. That way we can skirt around the issue if things get dicey. It’s disconcerting to be involved in a situation with someone who doesn’t speak openly and honestly, and instead talks around the issue instead of confronting it head on. We don’t know where we stand and may have no idea how to proceed. Everyone knows exactly how they feel in every situation, and we all have enough courage to say what we mean to clarify what’s happening. By being completely clear in our feelings and objectives, we can pave the way to our goals and find resolution to any problem. We are intelligent and have all the wisdom and courage we need to stand firm in our position and express ourselves confidently and openly. Every single destination is possible, and with focus and determination we will reach them all.

No two people are exactly alike. We all have our own preferences and ideas about how things should be done. When we’re working with others, we may differ and have diametrically opposed views about how to proceed. We can stand firm in our opinion and look for compromise, or we can cave and let others take over. What we do is up to us, but letting others drive the train will never take us where we want to go. Our desires are important and valuable. We can say what we want and move forward toward the goal.

When there is disagreement, if we don’t feel confident enough to stand up to opposition, but really want our viewpoint to prevail, we may choose to use coercion and manipulation to advance our cause. We can do anything we like, but the seeds we plant will determine what comes next. Being dishonest and manipulative may work in the beginning, but we may pay more in the end than we bargained for. By being completely clear, and saying exactly what we mean, the doors ahead will open, and we’ll reach success.

Today if you’re in a situation where you feel unsure you can prevail, be confident and state your views clearly. You are valuable and worthwhile. Tell us what you think and be courageous. You are amazing and your input is important. Step up and every door will open. All your dreams are there for you, and nothing can keep you from making them yours.

Hedge Fund

16 Jan

When we want something very badly and we aren’t sure we can accomplish it, we may hedge our bet to try to increase our odds. For instance, if we’re dating someone we like but aren’t sure the relationship will go anywhere, we may decide to date someone else on the side. That way, if one situation ends, we’ll have the other to fall back on. Or if we want someone to believe in us but know we can’t give them what they need, we may fabricate stories about our plans and pretend to do things in ways that will bring them closer. We may think if we can get them on board we’ll figure out how to keep them there later. Hedging our bet is a way to negate any loss that may come. In some arenas, it’s not a bad idea, but when interacting with others, it can be dangerous. Working behind the scenes may work against us. If those involved discover what we’re doing, we may lose everything. Nobody appreciates dishonesty and if our subterfuge is uncovered, the goal we’re seeking may be lost. Forever. When we want something, the best choice is to honestly and openly express our desire for it, and then do what is needed to achieve it. There isn’t anything we can’t do and we can gain whatever we’re seeking with honor. We don’t need to hedge our bet to win. We can win by doing our best.

The world is filled with all kinds of ideas. There are many ways to accomplish anything and if we choose to manipulate a situation, our options increase. If we aren’t sure we can get to our goal, we may choose to creatively shape our actions and frame our ideas in ways that make them seem more attractive. There is nothing wrong with enhancing our approach to make it more successful, but if we do it using trickery or pretense, we may get to the goal but our success may be precarious. Truth always rises and once all the facts are uncovered we may lose in the end. It does no good to gain something that slips through our fingers once our deceptive methods have been uncovered.

There are times when we may be unsure we can accomplish what we we’re seeking. We may think we don’t have the tools needed to get there or others involved will not receive us. We can talk ourselves out of any goal if our desire to achieve it isn’t strong enough. But there really isn’t anything we can’t accomplish. We have everything we need to succeed and even if we aren’t sure, we can go forward step by step and get to the goal. Manipulation, deceit, duplicity and trickery are tools for the weak. We are strong enough to move forward being honest and clear in our objective and we will succeed. We don’t need to hedge our bets. We have everything we need already.

Today if you’re thinking of manipulating a situation to get what you want, remember your integrity. You already have everything you need to succeed and you can win by being honest and sincere. There isn’t anything you can’t accomplish. Be the best you can be today and make your decisions based on the high standards you cherish. You are a gift to the world. Set the example for good and choose well.