Do you feel the pinch?

2 Jun

Have you ever worn shoes that were just a little too small? Maybe they felt okay at first but as you walked in them they began to pinch? Sometimes we can feel that sort of discomfort in our lives. It’s nothing serious, just a little pinch that something isn’t right. Like a blip on the radar that we can’t identify. We don’t feel exactly settled. Maybe we aren’t sleeping well, and we feel edgy. Something is off. Something is bugging us.

When this happens, it’s a good idea to give it some attention. Think about what we’re feeling. What is going on in our lives? Generally when we feel that little annoyance, there is something just under the surface that we’ve been ignoring. Perhaps it’s something someone said or did we blew off at the time, but has been bothering us ever since. Perhaps it’s a situation we’re involved in that for some reason just doesn’t fit. Perhaps it’s something we need to do that we keep putting off. Or maybe it’s something we did in the past that we need to revisit. Whatever it is, it helps to address it, so we can let it go.

Each day a lot of things happen to us. Sometimes we’re caught off guard by something, and even though we feel like we’ve moved on, sometimes it lingers. It’s there in the back of our minds niggling at us. Poking us to pay attention, making us feel unsettled. If it’s unpleasant, we may try to ignore it. But it remains, reminding us that it’s there. If we want to shake it off, first we have to fix it.

We deserve to get the most out of each day. We deserve to feel confident and settled. If there are things that take that from us, it’s best to change them. Once we determine what’s bothering us, and then do what it takes to let it go, our peace will return. It might be an easy fix, or it might be something that is more complicated. Once we’ve addressed the issue, done what we need to in order to let it go, we will be happier and feel like ourselves once more. We’ll feel relaxed again, and all those rough edges will smooth out.

Today if you’re feeling out of sorts, if you feel an annoying reminder of something that’s bothering you, address it. If it involves someone else, talk to them. If it involves a decision you need to make, decide. Whatever it is, fix it now, and find your center again. Small irritants can become bigger problems if we let them fester. Fix them while they’re small. Today is a great day to clean the closets. Once everything has been tidied up you can shut the door, and move on. Nothing will hold you back.

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The Waiting Game

1 Jun

Have you ever had to wait for a long time for something to happen, for something to arrive, or for someone to change? Have you ever waited for a long, long time for something you’ve been hoping for? If you have, you know how hard it can be. It’s hard to be patient for a long time. It’s hard to believe for a long time. It’s hard to wait, and wait, hoping that things will work out, and what you want will come to you. And as you wait, there will be those around you who will offer you advice. Some will support you, and others will tell you to stop. It really doesn’t matter what anyone else says. You’re waiting because it’s important to you. So you continue.

We only have control over what we do. We can’t control what others do, we can’t control what comes to us, and we don’t have the power to change everything. We only have the power to change ourselves. When we are waiting for someone else to do something, or for a situation to change that involves others, it can be very hard.

Waiting is a difficult game. It requires patience, stamina, and faith. We have to believe that what we’re waiting for will actually come to us. Otherwise there is no way to hold on. But if we really believe the change will come, that it will resolve the way we hope it will, we can manage it. If we really believe what we’re waiting for is worth it, we can hold on. We can wait a little longer.

But if the wait is too long, we may lose faith. If there is no way for us to make things happen, to make things work out, and nothing changes, we may give up. We may decide it’s no longer worth the fight. It’s no longer worth the struggle. We may decide to let the dream go. It hurts to let go, but after a time, if we’re sure we’ve done everything we could, and still nothing has changed, it may be time to reconsider. It may be time to change course.

Today if you’ve been waiting for something for a long time, take a moment to think about what you want most. Do you want to continue to hold on? Do you still believe what you’re hoping for is worth the struggle? Or will today be the day you decide to change things? If you decide to continue to wait, be strong. You’ve come this far, and this is just one more day. But if today is the day you let it go, be brave. Take a deep breath, and make a new plan. Whatever you choose, if you believe in what you’re doing, you’ll handle whatever comes. So, in or out, the path is yours to choose. Choose the path you want most. You deserve to be happy. Choose the path that will make you happy.

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Ducks

31 May

There is a popular saying that has several versions. Perhaps you’ve heard it, and maybe used it from time to time. “If it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck, it’s a duck.” It’s an effective axiom that applies to many situations. When in doubt and unsure about something, we can apply this saying, and come up with a seemingly logical answer. It works sometimes. But what if it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck, but somehow actually isn’t a duck? Then we’ve missed the mark. So how can we really know?

People can appear to be standoffish and aloof when they don’t mean to. Perhaps they seem to be rude because they look away when we say hello, and won’t initiate conversation when others are around. Or they may seem to be arrogant because they tend to keep themselves apart from the group. Sometimes all of these things are true – sometimes they are standoffish, aloof, and arrogant. They are ducks. But what if someone acts this way because they are just very shy? What if it’s hard for them to interact with others? They tend to hide and don’t initiate contact because it’s not something they are comfortable with. It takes some time and understanding to figure out what is really going on with those around us. Before we start labeling them, we should probably get all the facts.

People are complex and generally don’t tell everyone everything that is going on in their lives. They keep things to themselves because they are personal, and may be difficult to talk about. They may seem to be secretive. Others may be intimidated by large group activities. There is too much going on, and it makes them uncomfortable. They may seem anti-social, when actually they just don’t like big events. And there are those who are always the first to leave the party, and don’t ever stay long. Some may think they are unfriendly because they don’t hang around to socialize. But there may be a reason they need to get home that they haven’t shared.

It’s important that we take a wide view when interpreting personal expression. Today if you find yourself making judgment calls based on what you’re seeing at a superficial level, stop for a moment and think again. Things may be far different than they seem. Give the benefit of the doubt. There is always more to the story than we know. Be the one who extends friendship and acceptance when others are labeling ducks. “If it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck, it’s a duck.” Well, it is – sometimes. But be careful. Sometimes it’s not a duck at all.
 

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Getting There

30 May

Each day brings with it opportunities for growth and experience. Sometimes those opportunities are fun, sometimes they’re not, sometimes we ignore them, and sometimes we embrace them. It changes from day to day. But as we go along, there will be things we want to learn and gain. We may want to extend ourselves more. We may want to change our professional lives, or our academic success. We may want to be more social or more welcoming. The list is endless, and there are a lot of things we can pursue if we want to. But learning new behaviors, and changing personal patterns isn’t always easy. Before we begin, we have to really want the change. We have to really want the growth. It doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time, and we have to be diligent if we want to succeed.

It is said that our reach should exceed our grasp. We should be seeking beyond what we have accomplished. When we are reaching for something new, whatever that is, it’s a stretch. We have to push ourselves in a new direction. It may feel uncomfortable at first but like stretching our bodies, the more we do it, the further we can reach. We probably won’t succeed on our first attempt, but if we keep stretching, keep reaching, we will get there. This takes discipline and patience. The change may be slow, but if we work on it and keep our eyes on the goal, it will get easier to stay on track. And if we continue each day to move just a tiny bit closer, we will reach our destination. We will get to the goal, and we will be successful.

Often when we decide we need a change, we want it immediately. We can clearly see where we want to be, and waiting for it can be frustrating. Learning to get there can be hard. We can feel awkward and ungainly as we figure it out, and fine tune exactly how to go forward. Reaching beyond our grasp is challenging, but with patience, we can succeed.

Today if you are reaching for something that has eluded you, if you are trying hard to make a change that seems just out of your reach, keep stretching. Give yourself time. The goal is attainable. You’ll get there. And once you’ve succeeded, your confidence will soar. You can do anything. Keep reaching. You’re almost there.

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Face in the Wind

29 May

Human beings are complicated. Each one of us is different and unique. That uniqueness gives the world depth and interest, but it can also bring difficulty as we try to understand one another, cooperate with one another, and love one another. Most of us know who we are, what we want, and how we relate and react, but understanding that in others can be tricky. It takes patience and it takes time. When you add difficult circumstances and bad decisions to the mix, we may face trials that are very difficult, and we may feel daunted. Sometimes, because of our differences and the complex nature of this life, we can get into situations that are extraordinarily hard for us. When those come, we may think we can’t face them.

When we get into situations that we don’t understand, situations that hurt us, situations that are confusing and make us feel bad, we can feel lost. It’s hard to understand. Sometimes we aren’t sure which way to go. We need direction. We need inspiration. We need help to navigate and go forward. And sometimes we don’t think we can get through it. It’s too hard. It’s just too much. And trying to navigate any difficult situation when we’re convinced we can’t do it just makes it harder.

The truth is that there is nothing that will come to us that is so complex and difficult that we can’t face it. Nothing. No matter what comes to us, even the really difficult things, the really horrible things, we can face them. It will take time, and courage, but we can figure them out. We can overcome them. We may need help, and if we do, we should seek it. We can get help, we can get advice, we can think about the issue, and eventually we can solve it. All of us have been through trying times. And we will undoubtedly have more of them before we leave this life. Each trial brings experience, understanding, and growth. It would be nice if we could get all we need without trials and problems in our lives, but that is not the case. And so, we must face the hard times. We must put our faces in the wind, and walk forward. And the good news is that we can.

Today if you’re going through something hard, something really difficult, have faith. You will overcome this. You will succeed. The other side is there, waiting for you. Go forward one step at a time. Take your time. Have patience. This is just a moment. It will not last forever. Your peace will return, and you will be so much stronger after this trial has passed. Hold on. Be brave. There is nothing you can’t face. There is nothing you can’t do. You can do this.

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