Tag Archives: Judge


6 Nov

Life is complicated and we never know what will happen next. There are endless twists and turns that may appear without warning, and in an instant, everything may change and we may find ourselves alone and lost. Storms will come, darkness will fall, and we may wrestle with serious problems and disappointments. When everything is going wrong and nothing we do makes anything better, we may feel helpless, impotent or even incompetent. Our feelings of worth may be damaged, and we may conclude that because we can’t fix things, we’re failures. However, failure isn’t determined by what goes wrong in our lives. Things are going to go wrong, mistakes will happen, plans will fail, and there may be times when we may end up with nothing. Our personal worth is not a reflection of what happens to us, but how we handle what comes and continue to move forward. We can’t predict the future and unexpected developments may stop us for a time. But we are strong and intelligent, and even if every single plan collapses, and every turn we can see is blocked, we will find our way. We can stand still and process everything that’s happened, and then take the time we need to think about how we want to proceed. There will always be a way forward, and every answer we need will be there. We are powerful and wise, and nothing can hold us down indefinitely. We can be courageous and trust ourselves. We know what we want and we know where we want to go. Nothing is permanent and we can adjust our plans and start again. Life is all about learning, and unexpected changes bring lessons in stamina and strength. Every success we desire is still possible, and each step we take moves us closer to the destinations we desire.

Our lives are defined by our actions and choices. Some people are born to wealth and privilege, some to a more modest life, and some to poverty and hardship. No matter how we come into the world, the type of life we lead is our responsibility. Each choice we make defines the person we become. If we’re compassionate and wise, and choose well, our lives will reflect honesty and nobility. There is greatness in all of us, and when we express it through our actions every day, the whole world is blessed.

Some people are critical, and judge those around them by standards they set themselves. Their opinions belong to them and have no impact on the choices we make. Our lives are ours to design, and we can do anything we like. Our self-worth is reflected in everything we do. We are unique and valuable, and we can be confident moving forward on the roads we choose. Every option is open to us, and we can have the lives we dream about.

Today if nothing is going right, and you feel hopeless and alone, remember how wise and powerful you are. There isn’t anything strong enough to hold you in place forever. Look around at all the options possible, and take a step forward. Be confident. Every success is possible and you will reach them. You are worth more than you can imagine and we’re all blessed because you are here.


31 May

There is a popular saying that has several versions. Perhaps you’ve heard it, and maybe used it from time to time. “If it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck, it’s a duck.” It’s an effective axiom that applies to many situations. When in doubt and unsure about something, we can apply this saying, and come up with a seemingly logical answer. It works sometimes. But what if it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck, but somehow actually isn’t a duck? Then we’ve missed the mark. So how can we really know?

People can appear to be standoffish and aloof when they don’t mean to. Perhaps they seem to be rude because they look away when we say hello, and won’t initiate conversation when others are around. Or they may seem to be arrogant because they tend to keep themselves apart from the group. Sometimes all of these things are true – sometimes they are standoffish, aloof, and arrogant. They are ducks. But what if someone acts this way because they are just very shy? What if it’s hard for them to interact with others? They tend to hide and don’t initiate contact because it’s not something they are comfortable with. It takes some time and understanding to figure out what is really going on with those around us. Before we start labeling them, we should probably get all the facts.

People are complex and generally don’t tell everyone everything that is going on in their lives. They keep things to themselves because they are personal, and may be difficult to talk about. They may seem to be secretive. Others may be intimidated by large group activities. There is too much going on, and it makes them uncomfortable. They may seem anti-social, when actually they just don’t like big events. And there are those who are always the first to leave the party, and don’t ever stay long. Some may think they are unfriendly because they don’t hang around to socialize. But there may be a reason they need to get home that they haven’t shared.

It’s important that we take a wide view when interpreting personal expression. Today if you find yourself making judgment calls based on what you’re seeing at a superficial level, stop for a moment and think again. Things may be far different than they seem. Give the benefit of the doubt. There is always more to the story than we know. Be the one who extends friendship and acceptance when others are labeling ducks. “If it looks like a duck, and walks like a duck, it’s a duck.” Well, it is – sometimes. But be careful. Sometimes it’s not a duck at all.