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Leaning In

26 Mar

We go through a lot of experiences every day as we navigate through our lives.  Some things bring us joy, some make us angry, some are boring and others may be intense or pass with little notice.  Our emotions and how we respond to them are part of what make us human and help others relate to us.  Some people are good at hiding their emotions and prefer not to let others see how they really feel.  Others wear their hearts on their sleeves and we can see everything they’re feeling most of the time.  Being open with our feelings helps us express ourselves and makes it easier for others to understand us.  But if our feelings are negative, or angry and intense, allowing them to color our interactions may make our lives more difficult and complicated.  It’s fine to share personal expressions but we must remember they may affect the message we are trying to portray.  When we are upset and angry and scream at those around us to make a point, the only thing we may accomplish is to push them away.  Trying to understand someone who is hysterical or acting irrationally out of anger is almost impossible.  We can express even intense disappointment in a better way.  If we want to make sure others grasp how important something is, it’s more effective to lower our voices than to raise them.  If we blast those around us with powerful loud voices, they will often step back.  But when our voice is quieter, people will lean in closer to hear what we have to say.  Being heard is important and even if we’re intensely upset we can control our emotions to allow that to happen.

The only way for a baby to express pain, hunger or unhappiness is to scream and cry.  But as we mature, if we want to be happy, we must learn self-control.  As adults, it will never work in our favor to stamp our feet and scream because we are unhappy.  There are no good answers to be found in bad behavior.  We can be in control of our emotions, even when they are intense, and express ourselves in ways that bring people closer and open the doors to the way forward.

Life will surely bring us happy times and difficult, sometimes complicated and extreme problems.  We don’t have to pretend to be happy when things are going wrong but we can control how we respond to every situation in order to bring the best results.  Jumping to hysteria and pushing the panic button every time something goes awry will never take us where we really want to go.  It’s exhausting and keeps us from thinking about our next step.  We have everything we need to understand any situation that comes to us.  If we take time to think instead of react we will find all the answers we need to find our way through.  We are strong and capable, and can live well and effectively.

Today if you’re furious over something and want to lash out at those around you, quiet your thoughts and allow yourself time to think.  You can control your emotions in ways that will bring you happiness and success.  Step back and then step forward.  There isn’t anything you can’t manage and succeed.  You are strong and amazing, and nothing is too difficult for you to overcome.

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Distant Shore

22 Mar

Disappointments and heartache are common experiences in life. They happen to everyone and can be devastating when they come to us. It can be hard to look forward and see anything in front of us when our hearts are broken or we have to face a terrible setback. Plans for our next step may elude us as we grapple with what has happened and try to find our footing. When the pain is great it may be hard to see ahead and all we can think about is making the hurt go away. It can feel like being stranded at sea unable to see land anywhere. We know there is a distant shore out there somewhere but we have no idea how to reach it. When all our plans have disintegrated and our lives feel foreign and out of control it’s hard to find the way forward. Life is all about change and even if we can’t see a future when we’re grieving over something that has devastated us, it’s still there. We will never be left without a shore waiting for us. It may be in the distance and we may need time to find our way to it, but it will always be there waiting for us to arrive. Even if we feel completely lost and alone, even if we don’t know how we’re going to get through, we will find a way. Tomorrow will come and what we’re facing today will change. We can take small steps forward until we feel confident again and are able to see the road ahead. We can stand tall in the midst of despair and look forward. There will always be another road waiting to take us where we want to go. We are strong enough and brave enough, and we have enough wisdom and intelligence to figure out anything that comes. We have all the power we need to overcome anything and we will prevail.

When our circumstances turn and we’re suddenly in a foreign and uncomfortable situation, it may be unsettling and difficult. There may be times when everything we counted on changes and suddenly we’re facing new and uncharted territory. It’s hard to feel confident when we’re in a new set of parameters and aren’t sure which way is up. But we can understand new situations and learn our way around anything that happens. We can trust ourselves to unravel even the most complicated issues and figure out what to do next.

Sorrow is an intense emotion that may overwhelm us. We may feel paralyzed by our misery and believe we’ll be stuck forever. But nothing in life is truly permanent. Everything is always changing and when we’re ready we will find our way again. Disappointments will come but we have everything we need to face whatever life brings. There will always be a way forward and we will find the roads that will take us to success.

Today if you’re heartbroken and devastated and feel like you’ll never be whole again, trust yourself. You’ve overcome many difficult complications already and you will prevail. There isn’t anything strong enough or powerful enough to hold you down. You are amazing and can do anything. Be patient and take courage. Everything you need is there for you. The shore is waiting and you will find it. Take a step forward. Happiness is just ahead.

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Waiting for Luck

15 Feb

There are a lot of things to accomplish in our lives. We have responsibilities to tend to, jobs to work, chores to get done, and endless details that need our attention. Sometimes we get so caught up in our ‘to do’ lists and carried away with all the particulars of our every day lives, we set our dreams and personal goals aside. They sit dormant in the backs of our minds waiting for us to engage them. In the meantime, we spend our time getting other things done and wait for the moment when we can open the door back to them and begin to make them come true. Life has a way of taking over and if we don’t control how we spend our time, our time will control us. Waiting for the perfect moment to arrive when everything is settled and we can finally do what we’ve been putting off is like waiting for luck. It’s probably not going to show up anytime soon. Life can be complicated and waiting for the perfect time to finally do what we want most is futile and unrealistic. If we want to find real success we must take control of our decisions and move forward. There will be complications and interference, and dozens of things that need to be done, but we can, in the midst of any situation, make time for what we really want to do. How we spend our time reflects what we value most. There isn’t anything we can’t accomplish if we’re willing to do what is needed to make it happen. As soon as we decide they are important, we can begin to make our dreams come true. Our lives belong to us and we can design them any way we choose. Choosing well will help us find success and happiness.

When there is something we really want to accomplish, no matter how busy we are, we find a way to get it done. But if we aren’t really committed to a task, we may put it off until we ‘find’ time to do it. Time is constant. It doesn’t wait, it doesn’t bend, and it can’t be found. Waiting to find time to do anything is the same as saying it’s not a priority. Only we can decide what is important to us. Being honest with ourselves about our choices will help us move forward in ways that will take us where we want to go, and bring us satisfaction.

Sometimes we may hesitate before beginning toward a goal. We may not be confident we can reach it, or face criticism because it’s different than what others think we should do, or we may be unsure of the way forward. Hesitation is a pause we can use to consider all our options before we begin. We can move forward in ways that work uniquely for us, and with determination and focus, reach any destination. There is nothing we can’t accomplish and no road is too long to travel. We have everything we need to go anywhere we choose. Everything is there for us. We need only begin.

Today if you’ve been waiting for everything to fall into place so you can start reaching your goals, begin now. Take the first step forward and plan your life around what you really want to accomplish. Be in control of the road ahead and all your dreams will come true. You can do anything. Be confident. Every goal is within reach, and you will get there.

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What is Real

15 Jan

Life is filled with all kinds of distractions and complications. When we’re unhappy with where we are, those distractions and complications may allow us to keep our eyes off what we don’t want to see and help us ignore things we don’t want to face. It’s not hard to look away or pretend a disappointing situation is different than it really is. All we have to do is focus on something else and we can defer what we don’t want to address. But what is real is where we are and looking the other way or ignoring anything will never make it change. If we’re unhappy with our appearance we can avoid anything that reflects our image and just keep moving. If our personal relationships are disappointing, or worse, we can go through the motions and make believe they will improve even if there is nothing indicating any change will happen. We can live in a make-believe world and we may convince ourselves that what we imagine is really happening. That might work for a time but reality has a way of breaking through and eventually we must face things as they really are. What is real is where we are. We have everything we need to create lives that are fulfilling and satisfying on every level. Pretending will never take us where we want to go. It’s like living in a house of mirrors, each one bending the truth to something that isn’t real. We can find true happiness and success when we look at everything openly and truthfully. We can take the blinders off, face any situation before us and determine where we want to go. Success is always available to us and we will have it.

Our dreams are personal and unique and we have everything we need to make them come true. It takes courage to decide to live our lives our own way and do the things we dream about. It takes determination to find the right roads and stay focused on the goal. We have all the courage and determination we need and once we decide we deserve the lives we dream about, we can make everything reality.

There will always be a reason to stay in a situation that isn’t working for us. If it’s a relationship that isn’t working we may think we have to stay to prevent hurting the other person. If it’s a job that’s unfulfilling we may think we owe something to our boss. If it’s a personal change we want to make we may hesitate worried we won’t succeed. We deserve true and complete happiness and nothing is more valuable than living our lives authentically, in complete harmony with what we truly want. We have everything we need to do anything. It’s all there for us and we can take the steps needed to find success.

Today if you’re in a situation that isn’t working, or you want to make a personal change you’ve put off, afraid that you’ll fail, be brave. Take the first step today to move forward toward where you really want to be. Your life is yours and you can live it exactly the way you desire. Be strong and confident. There isn’t anything you can’t do. Take control of what you want and go get it. It’s all there for you.

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Wasted Years

4 Jan

There are few times in life when we go from one place to another in a completely straight line with no interruptions or detours. Every journey we take has many twists and turns. We don’t live in a vacuum and are subject to all kinds of outside influences. There are others around us making all kinds of decisions we aren’t aware of which may affect the road ahead. We can adjust our direction with each new situation and in time, find our way to any destination. If we get stuck and years go by before we are able to see clearly and shake free to begin again, we may feel we’ve wasted our time. Looking back over years struggling with something that was never going to work can undermine our confidence and we may believe we’ve ruined our chances for success. Even if we don’t move forward, the time is never wasted. Whatever we’re focused on, and whatever we’re doing teaches us something new. There is no need to worry about what we haven’t accomplished. The future is ahead of us and we can begin again. Time spent spinning our wheels gives us time to grow so when the right moment arrives we are ready to move. We can change anything we desire and move forward. There isn’t any goal we can’t reach. The whole world is there for us when we’re ready to take it.

When we’re on a road trip and reach a stop sign it’s our signal to wait and watch before proceeding. In our lives we come upon many stop signs but sometimes we miss them because we are busy or distracted. If we forge ahead on a road that isn’t ready for us, or isn’t complete, we will not be able to proceed. We all face situations that are not good for us, places we shouldn’t go if we want to succeed, and people we should avoid. But if we miss the signs that warn us to stop we may not realize it until much time has passed and we are lost. Getting lost will not end our journey. Once we understand the situation, we can change our trajectory and find the right way forward.

Time is valuable and irreplaceable. Nobody lives forever or knows how much time they have. We can never change the past but we have complete control over our futures. If we’ve lost time doing things that haven’t moved us forward, we can modify our choices and begin again. We have all the wisdom, strength and power we need to change any situation we desire. We can let go of what is holding us back, and be free to find our way ahead. Every moment is a passage to the next. Choosing what we want the most, and heading toward the destinations we desire will bring us satisfaction and success. We can do anything. Nothing is out of reach and the best roads ahead are there waiting for us.

Today if you feel like you’ve wasted years doing something that distracted you from where you really want to be, straighten your journey going forward and begin again. You can achieve any success you desire and go anywhere you want to go. Shake off what has held you back and start forward. All your dreams are attainable and you will reach them. Trust yourself. You already have everything you need to succeed.

 

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