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Sunday Drive

18 Nov

We get a lot of advice from others around us. Family members may tell us what they think we should be doing, bosses may tell us how they want us to go forward, friends may tell us what we should change, and it seems everyone in our circle has an opinion about how we’re living our lives. There is nothing wrong with getting advice, but if we did what everyone else thought we should be doing, we might end up doing nothing we want to do. It’s easy to be swayed by someone close to us when they tell us what they think we need to hear. And sometimes we may even believe they know more about us than we do. But we are the experts on ourselves, and we know what we want and need better than anyone else. We can be confident in making our own choices and we can be independent of those around us. We love them, but we control our lives, and we can manage them our way.

Having confidence in the ability to manage our own lives comes easily for some, but is more difficult for others. If we’ve been held tightly and given a lot of supervision and direction, we may come to rely on that support. Over time if we continue to let others make our decisions, or heavily influence us, we might not realize what we really want. Going along is easy. We just do what we’re told and play the game. But the problem with going along is that we may get lost in doing what someone else has decided and over time may forget that we, too, have a voice.  And our voices are valuable. We are just as relevant and important as anyone else. If we continually sit in the back seat and just ride along with other people’s plans, we can’t drive our lives where we want to go.

Speaking up and saying what we want empowers us and gives us confidence. We don’t have to be forceful, or domineering, but we can state our preferences. If others disagree, we can accept that and still be confident in doing whatever is best for us. Our lives are unique, and we get to decide where they go, what we do, and how we’ll go forward. We can think about what we want, and then we can do what it takes to get it. There is nothing that will stop us if we want something badly enough. Other opinions may be valuable and we may listen to them, but when it comes to making the decision, we can determine which way to go. Nobody knows us better than we do. We know what we want, and we certainly have everything we need to achieve it.

Today if you’ve been going along and taking lots of advice, remember that you can choose your own course. You can decide what’s best for you. Your life is yours and you have everything you need to make the best decisions. Be confident. Whatever you choose to do will be right for you. Design your life exactly as you like, and it will be perfect.

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Step One

16 Nov

We have a lot of goals in our lives. There are many things we think about, things we want to do, and things we want to achieve. But having a goal is just the first step in accomplishing anything. Thinking about what we want to do is fine, but if we’re serious about achieving it, we have to do more. The famous French writer Antoine de Saint-Exupery said, “A goal without a plan is just a wish.” And that’s true. It’s fun to wish for things but if we want our wishes to become reality, we need to make a plan to accomplish them and then implement it. It takes action to succeed in anything. We can dream and wish and hope for things to happen, but nothing will ever change until we do something to make the change a reality.

When we seriously want something in our lives, we must do what it takes to get it. Sometimes it’s necessary to change what we’re used to or what we’ve been comfortable with.  Maybe we have to give up some free time, or we have to step out of our comfort zone and extend ourselves to those we don’t know. Maybe we have to let go of some long held fear. When what we really want means a great deal to us, we can make those sacrifices. But if we have to do something that scares us, or we’re intimidated by the process needed to get to the goal, it may take more courage than we initially anticipated. And then we’ll have to determine how much we want to succeed. If we really want to go forward, there is nothing that will stand in our way. We will do what it takes, no matter what that entails.

There is nothing we can’t do if we want to badly enough. There is no obstacle so large that it will prevent us from achieving our goal. We can do anything. But we must decide what we really want. They say we always do what we want to do most. That seems evident. If we say we want to change but keep doing the same things, the real truth is that we want things to stay the same. If we really want to change we have to embrace it and do what is needed to make it happen. If we keep doing the same things over and over again, change will never happen. Even if we talk about what we want to do, even if we think about it constantly, even if we dream about it, if we do nothing to change where we are, we will never achieve it.

Today if you’ve been dreaming about a change you want in your life, if you’ve been wishing for it and thinking about it, do one thing that will take you closer to it. Take the first step to start moving forward to the goal, and set a date to accomplish it. Then start doing what is needed to make it a reality. With every step you take you’ll be closer than you were before. You can do anything. Start now. There is nothing that will stop you or stand in your way. You have everything you need to succeed.

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One Star

12 Nov

When we’re looking for direction or trying to find our way through something in our lives, there are a lot of options available to us. There are countless roads we could choose and limitless paths we could follow. When we really want to make the best decision, and we’re struggling to find our way, all those choices can be overwhelming. Sometimes we just want someone to tell us how to do it, and which way to go. But the decision must be ours and although we may get a lot of advice, we need to choose the direction ourselves. There are billions of stars in the sky. They are all beautiful and each is perfect in its own way. When we’re looking for an answer, it’s like identifying the one single star that will guide us. We need to find what fits and what will take us exactly where we want to go. It takes a little time to figure it out, but once we’ve identified it, is easier to move forward.

Making decisions when the stakes are high can be complicated. We can get lost worrying about outcomes and impact. We can get frozen in time and unable to move forward because we don’t really know what will happen. But we don’t have to get stuck. We can take the time needed to make the best choice, and then no matter what comes, we will handle it. There is no way to know where every road will take us. We can try hard to see the future based on our experiences from the past, and that will help. But with all the variables we face every day, nothing is certain. So, taking some time and evaluating the best plan forward is all we can do. Once we’ve determined that, we can boldly proceed, confident that we chose wisely, and let things play out accordingly.

If we are lost and completely unsure, we can get help. We can ask those we trust, we can talk to someone who has faced a similar situation, we can get professional advice or whatever else will aid us in determining our way forward. Most people are willing to help when asked, and there is a lot of experience we may draw from. If the situation is personal, and we don’t want to talk about it with others, we must rely on personal experience and careful thought. We are capable of making excellent decisions. There is one star out there, shining down on us, with all the wisdom and inspiration we need to go forward. Sometimes we just need to look up, and listen to find the answer.

Today if you’re pondering a heavy decision and aren’t sure which way to go, take some time to listen to your heart, and consider all your options. You’ll figure this out. You will make an excellent decision. You are far wiser and more capable than you think you are. You know where you want to go, and you will choose the best road to take you there.

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Which Way

9 Nov

There are countless directions we can take with our lives. We can do anything we want and we can choose our direction any way we see fit. Whichever way we choose to go will take us to a specific destination. Whether we are successful or not depends first on our ability to identify where we want to end up. If we want to be a scientist, we have to choose an education that will open the door for us. If we want to be a dancer, we have to begin learning steps. It’s impossible to achieve anything unless we direct our course appropriately and do what is needed to get there. It’s a simple concept, but we can get confused and although we think we know where we want to go, may actually be on the wrong road to get there. Life is complex and our path is affected by a lot of influences and forces we can’t control. But we can control our decisions, and once we decide what we want, we can also control our direction to achieve it.

It’s important in any endeavor to think about where our feet are pointing. Some destinations have a lot of routes that will take us there, and some have only a few. For instance, if we want to a career that requires a college education, we must get on the road that will give us that education to open the door to that career. But if we want to do humanitarian work, there are many paths we could choose. The first step is to define where we want to go. Where do we want to end up? What do we want to accomplish? What’s the goal? Once we determine those things, we can begin to chart our course. After we make our plan, complications will inevitably begin. It seems there is no end to complications in this life and most things are never as easy as they seem at the beginning. But no matter what happens, if we know where we want to end up, and we keep our eyes on the goal, we can continue moving forward, and in time we will achieve it.

Sometimes in the middle of a journey, we change, and decide to alter our course to accommodate a new destination. There is certainly nothing wrong with changing our minds, but if all we do is continually change the goal, we may never accomplish much. We can do anything but there are so many choices it takes focus to choose well and stick to a decision. Focusing and sticking are imperative if we want to succeed.  Once we get to one destination, if we like, we may immediately plot a new course that will take us to the next goal. If we remember what we want to do, if we plan and stay true in each decision, we will accomplish a lot in our lives, and in the end, will be successful in doing all the things we want to do.

Today if you’ve been thinking about your direction, if you aren’t sure your feet are pointing to the destination you most want, re-set your course. You can accomplish any goal you set out to do. Once you’ve made your decision, stick to it and keep moving forward. Take things as they come and stay focused on the road ahead. You can do anything you set your mind to. Point your feet in the direction you want to travel, take a step forward, and you’ll realize all your dreams.

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Chopsticks

5 Nov

Every day we live is a chance to experience joy and do something to move us closer to where we want to be. We are in control of our days and the choices we make. When we choose well, we are content, but sometimes things don’t go exactly the way we want them to. Imagine you are holding one chopstick that represents your day today. As long as you hold onto it you’re in control and you can do anything you want. But if you give it away to someone else, they will be in charge for the day. We all want to be in control of our days, so it seems foolish to hand them over to anyone else. But if we let the hurt or pain caused by someone else control us, that is exactly what we do. We give our day away. While it’s true that some wounds don’t heal right away, each day we let the disappointment, pain, fear, or anger control our lives, we give that day to the person or situation that caused it. And the irony is that those who have hurt us usually have no idea they have control.

Pain is a part of life. We can’t prevent it, we can’t escape it, we can only process it and move through it. If we lived alone on an isolated, deserted island, everything would be in our control. But we live with others, and their decisions, for better or worse, affect our lives. We bump into each other, we annoy each other, and we sometimes hurt each other. Of course, we also love each other, we share joy, and we embellish each others’ lives. It’s a mixed bag. When we get hurt, and don’t heal right away, we grieve until we’re able to move on. That’s normal. But if we let the hurt define our lives, if we let it keep us from moving forward, and are unable to let it go, we give our lives away to it. Our lives are important. They count. We have a lot to offer. Losing even one day is a great loss.

Getting over serious pain or disappointment isn’t easy. It takes work, and it takes time. How much time it takes depends on a lot of factors. Only we can decide when to let it go and begin to move forward. We can hold onto it for as long as we like but each day we do, we have to symbolically give up our chopstick, and the control over our lives. In some situations it takes considerable time to process everything, and not having control isn’t an issue. But in time, if we want to be happy again, if we want to move forward, we will have to heal and take control again. Life can be complicated. It can extremely joyful, or desperately sad. Nobody knows what each day will bring, but we can face whatever comes. We can overcome any disappointment, any disaster, and any loss. And when we’re ready, we can recover and guide our lives to where we most want to be.

Today if you’ve been struggling with something that has been so difficult you’ve been stopped in your tracks, think about the way forward. You have so much to offer. Take the first step in regaining your control. Own your day today. Hang on tight. Lift your head and look forward. There is a road waiting for you. You have everything you need to get to it, and by taking the very first step you’ll find your way back to happiness again.

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