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Listening and Hearing

31 Jan

In our personal conversations, sometimes what we’re listening to isn’t the full meaning of what is being said. We can listen and listen and still miss the message. There are a lot of distractions, sometimes our personal opinions color what we’re hearing and sometimes we only hear part of the information being communicated. There is a big difference between listening to someone and really hearing what they are saying. Although we may hear the words it may take a while to fully understand what they mean. People are complex and if the message is difficult or painful they may color it with words that muddle the situation. If we want to understand anything and make good decisions, we need all the information. If the message is confusing we can take it apart, ponder it, and get to the truth. Even in complicated situations if we are careful we can hear what’s really being said and then take the time we need to understand the full message. Knowing the complete truth of any situation helps us navigate it more successfully. We can be clear on the message by not only listening but really taking the time to hear it.

Some people talk in circles. They struggle to speak clearly and may go around and around an issue. Perhaps they have an unclear understanding of the message or are intimidated by it and afraid of speaking too plainly. When we encounter these situations, we may get lost as they go here and there, speaking around the information they are trying to relay. We may ask for details but often we must rely on our ability to discern the true message and extrapolate the real meaning behind the conversation. No matter how confusing the story may seem at first, if we take time to think about what’s being said we can find the answers. Once we decide we know what the real message is we may ask for clarification and verify our conclusions.

There may be times when someone speaks to us in ways that are confusing because they are trying to accomplish something and don’t want others to know. Maybe they feel they need to share part of the story but don’t want to give all the details. If they have an agenda that is dishonest or in some way will impact us negatively their words may be convoluted and confounding. If they will not clarify the message we need to find the answers on our own. We don’t have to blindly follow something we are unsure of and we can do what is needed to fully understand any situation before proceeding. We can listen and then discern truth to fully hear what is being said. We are capable of understanding many things and if we are careful we can move forward confident we know the full story.

Today if you’re confused by something that is being said and are struggling to understand, take the time to really hear the message. You are an excellent listener. You will find the truth and the way forward with confidence. There isn’t anything you can’t comprehend. Be confident and be wise. The answers are there for you and you will find them.

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Cut and Paste

20 Jan

Life brings us all kinds of experiences.  Whether they are good or bad depends on what’s happening and where we are.  We learn something new with everything we experience and decide as we move forward what we’ll take with us.  We don’t have to carry everything along as we go and can cut the things we don’t want.  If we experience something that won’t benefit us we can simply leave it behind.  However, if we learn something that helps us get to our goals we can hold onto it and incorporate it going forward. The trick is to accurately discern between the two.  Sometimes there may be things we’ll want to forget, especially if there are moments we don’t feel we did our best, but there will be other things we learned that strengthen us and give us additional courage.  We can hold onto new behaviors that help us or make us more confident.  As each challenge comes and goes, if we’re careful and pay attention, we will find things to take with us that enrich us and deepen our understanding.  Life is a great educator.  There really isn’t anything we’ll go through that won’t teach us something and no matter how much we’ve learned, there will always be more waiting for us.  Learning to cut and paste the things we experience will help us get the most out of each lesson and move us forward more effectively.  We are capable of changing and learning many things and as we travel through our journey can find our way to where we most want to be.

Some experiences stick to us because of their intensity or difficulty.  If the experience was very painful, even after it changes we may have trouble letting go and moving on. If the process created a permanent change in our lives or our relationships have been affected, we may grieve for what has been lost and it may be difficult to find our footing again.  If we’ve been hurt deeply we may need time to heal.  Even very good changes that are intense may take time to adjust to but we have everything we need to manage our lives well and no matter what happens we’ll find our way.

Life changes constantly and no matter how we may want things to stay the same, everything will eventually change.  If we are attached to keeping our lives in stasis, if we are intimidated by the process of change or are afraid of what the changes will bring, we may struggle to let go.  But we can cut what is no longer useful.  We can leave the baggage behind that we don’t need to carry.  We can let go of anything that is holding us back.  There is a long road ahead filled with promise and expectation and we can walk forward unencumbered by pain from the past.

Today if you’ve experienced something that has changed you in some way and you feel different than before, move forward with confidence.  You can let go of the things you no longer need, hold onto to what is helpful, and find success.  You’ve learned so much already and you know where you want to go.  You are courageous and wise enough to create a brilliant future filled with happiness.

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Under Cover

20 Dec

People are complicated. They don’t always show us everything they are or what they can do. We all have things we keep to ourselves and some of us hold our cards closer to our chests than others. Sometimes we’re shy, sometimes we don’t have enough confidence to open all our doors, and sometimes we prefer to keep things private. Because we can’t know everything behind the scenes we often make judgments based on what we can see. We don’t know that man at work who dresses funny is an excellent painter who does stunning abstracts. Or that woman at church who is always so aloof spends two days a week teaching reading to underprivileged children. Or our grouchy old neighbor is an accomplished musician who traveled the world performing. If we don’t take any time to know others, all we see is what’s on the surface of those around us. We can’t know what’s beneath the obvious unless we take the time to find out. Saying hello in passing and making judgments based on what’s obvious will only give us part of the story. This world can be a lonely place and it’s hard to feel connected when nobody really knows who we are. We can bring happiness and comfort by asking and letting others share themselves with us. As we get to know each other better we can build understanding and bring unity to our world.

If you’ve ever gone snorkeling in the ocean, you’ve seen some of the different and wonderful things that exist below the surface. It’s a far different world below than it seems when we look out onto the water. The surface may be beautiful but all we can see is the very top of what’s there. Under the water there are countless types of fish, plants, corals and other things that are amazing in their diversity and scope. One could never imagine what is beneath the water by looking only at the surface. It’s the same with us. We can only see what’s on the outside of those around us. We know what they look like and how they react in a limited environment. If we really want to know who they are, we have to dive deeper and spend some time getting to know what’s below the surface.

Some people are very private and it takes a while to get to know them. They have their own reasons for why they keep to themselves, but if we engage them and show we are their friends and can be trusted, they will open up to us and reveal more of who they are. And when they do we’ll be embellished by learning more about them and the connections between us will strengthen. We may forge a bond of trust and respect that wasn’t there before. The whole human race is our family. We belong to it and it belongs to us. Learning about each other helps us understand more and feel closer as we move forward.

Today if you’ve been keeping to yourself and not showing the world who you really are, take a chance and open up. If there is someone you would like to know better, engage them and let them show you who they are. We all have so much to offer. Today share yourself and let others tell you about their lives as well. You’ll feel closer and more connected and your world will expand.

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Super Moon

15 Dec

As we go through our lives and attend to all our responsibilities we are focused on the things that need to get done and where we want to be. Life can be busy and complicated, it can get messy and troublesome, and we may get lost seeing only what’s just ahead and miss other things going by. There are moments for all of us that are so captivating we are entirely consumed by them – our baby’s first step, the first kiss with a new love, a beautiful snowflake, a rainbow after a big storm, a reunion with a long, lost relative, and other poignant and captivating experiences. But many times, as we’re accomplishing our tasks we don’t notice some of the beautiful, enchanting or rewarding things passing us by. We keep our heads down and our eyes focused on the goal ahead and never hear the ice cream truck or see the red balloon floating up in the sky. It’s good to be focused and moving forward but there are many blessings all around us. If we look up, and see what else is going on our lives will be enriched and blessed. We only get one chance to live each day. Seeing everything we can, and noticing every nuance possible will bring us great joy and fulfillment.

Sometimes we have good intentions to do something, see something, or go somewhere but our schedules get in the way and we don’t make it. Super moons don’t happen all the time. They only occur when a full moon makes its closest approach to the earth. When that happens, the moon appears larger and brighter than normal and it’s amazing to behold. When one is predicted, we may read or hear about it and decide we want to see it, but then miss it because we were busy and forgot. We got carried away with all the things we were doing and didn’t take time to see it. Our chance to experience it has passed. Of course, it’ll come around again but if we continue doing things as we’ve been doing them, chances are we may miss it again.

It’s important to do all the many tasks we need to accomplish. Others rely on us and we must take care of ourselves. But as we’re storming through our days and checking off our lists, there are magical things all around us just waiting to be noticed. If we can slow down just a little and look up, be in the moment and cherish each breath, and pay more attention to the world around us we will be happier and our lives will be richer. We can stop and remember the very first time we tasted chocolate, or see how it feels to swing as high as possible, or how much fun it is to run into the ocean. If we do, our daily experiences will be enhanced. There are limitless things to do and see in life. We can reach out to them and broaden our horizons and our capacity for happiness will increase. We can get the most out of each day. We can see more, notice more, and remember how wonderful it is to be alive.

Today if you’ve been focused on your tasks and what needs to be done, look up and see what’s going on around you. Notice everything and broaden your scope. There’s something that will make you smile and bring you joy. Pay attention and let it fill your heart going forward. Your life is precious and wonderful. See everything and live it as fully as possible.

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Growing Up

12 Dec

“We’re all told at some point in time that we can no longer play the children’s game…” Moneyball

When we’re children we act like children and as childhood flashes by we go through a lot of changes. Childhood is the time for us to begin our lives and start to learn and understand how things work, decide what kind of people we want to be, and what we want to do. For most of us moving into adulthood is a normal progression we grow into each day. But for some it’s more difficult and we may get stuck holding onto childish behaviors. We may not be able to control ourselves or make good choices, we may be subject to tantrums and hysterics, or get stuck acting out immaturely. It’s impossible to be successful adults if we’re behaving like children. For most of us the transition into adulthood is natural and we learn the lessons needed as time passes to become fully integrated and capable. However, if we refuse to grow up, and get stuck wishing for the innocence and carefree years of the past, we will face many difficulties. We cannot be children and adults at the same time. If we want to be truly happy we must embrace our lives as they are, let go of the children’s game and move forward.

Children cannot understand or compete in the adult world. They don’t have the experience or understanding to comprehend how things work or what needs to be done. They lack the self-control required to face disappointments easily and process undesired changes. They have everything they need to be children, and we never expect them to possess adult attributes. However, once we’ve grown up it’s our responsibility to learn what we need to interact effectively with the other adults in our lives. We must let go of the trappings of childhood and embrace growth. We can all become successful adults willing and able to work with others and understand our circumstances. If we need help adjusting it is our responsibility to get it. Only then can we be successful and move forward.

Fantasy is fun but if we are confused about what is real and what is fantasy we may get lost. It’s perplexing for others to be around adults who hang onto childish things and act in childish ways. Life isn’t always easy and it can be hard to face difficulties and try to unravel complex issues. We may not want to face what is before us but hiding behind childish behavior will not solve them for us. We have everything we need to become fully successful. We are brave and strong and capable of facing anything that comes to us. We can grow and mature and become our best selves.

Today if you’ve been struggling and wishing you were a child again, trust yourself to expand. Life is always moving forward. There is no way to return to the past. Be where you are and gain all the knowledge and experience you need to be successful. You can do anything and do it well. Today is a great blessing. Move ahead with confidence.

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