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Tag Archives: Routine

Rear View Mirror

8 Aug

As we go through our lives we experience many scenarios and situations. Sometimes they are beneficial and we build connections and remain. Others times they may be passing encounters or situations that are uncomfortable and we decide to let go. Although we can choose where we’ll go and how we’ll live our lives we might face a time where we end up in a place that isn’t working for us but is hard to disengage from. Perhaps it’s a difficult relationship that is unmanageable but we aren’t sure how to change it. Or maybe it’s a pattern we’ve developed that worked in the beginning but no longer brings us happiness. Life is filled with all kinds of opportunities and experiences. If we find ourselves doing things that aren’t bringing us joy we can change them. It doesn’t matter if we’ve been doing the same thing for years or if the change we desire causes temporary turmoil. What matters is that we live our lives authentically and in ways that bring us satisfaction and joy. We are the only ones who can create happiness in our lives. We know what we want most of all and we can let go of anything that prevents us from achieving it. We can drive forward leaving what doesn’t work in the rear view mirror. Our lives are ours to design our own way. If others disagree we can still do what is best for us. We can move forward and leave the past behind. We have all the wisdom and courage to make the decisions we need to be completely happy and fulfilled.

Routines make us feel comfortable and if we do the same things every day we may feel secure because the scenery doesn’t change. Routines are great for sameness but not effective if we want to grow and stretch. We can’t discover how far we can go if we stay in the same place day after day. There are limitless things we could do with our lives and endless experiences we could enjoy but we must be open to new things and willing to step away from the norm. We can try something new and stretch beyond where we are today.

When our relationships with others are difficult and we feel restricted it’s hard to express who we really are. When others have expectations of what we’ll do or how we’ll act and we comply with their desires we may get along for a time. We may be able to go through the motions but eventually our true selves will push forward and we’ll need to change. Who we really are is precious and valuable. We don’t have to fit in, we don’t have to pretend, and we can genuinely be our best selves. Nobody could possibly design a better fit for us than who we already are. We can share that and be truly happy. The uniqueness and individuality we bring is priceless and a gift no one else can bring.

Today if you’re in a situation that isn’t where you want to be or going along with something that isn’t what you really want to do, reframe your way forward. You can be yourself and choose a path that reflects what you want most. You are unique and wonderful just as you are. Leave the games behind and be yourself. You are a gift to the world and your uniqueness blesses us all.

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Opting Out

13 Apr

There are all kinds of people in the world and limitless types of personalities. We interact with them every day and their influence in our lives varies. Most of the time we get along fine but there may be times when we struggle with someone else’s behavior or decisions. Perhaps they have trouble controlling their temperament, maybe there are honesty issues, or they are difficult for us to understand. If we must collaborate with them we may find the experience challenging and frustrating. Although there may be times when we absolutely must deal with a difficult person, generally we have the option of going another way. We don’t have to stay in any relationship we don’t want. Even if we’ve been dealing with the situation for years, unless we absolutely must keep them in our lives we may opt out and step away. Sometimes we get into a manipulative situation where the other person tries to control us or in some way exerts power over us. It doesn’t matter how much time we’ve been involved, it doesn’t matter how much the other person expects from us, and it doesn’t matter what others think. If we aren’t happy and want a change we may have it. We can do anything that is best for us regardless of other opinions. If we aren’t happy where we are, we may opt out and take another road.

It’s wonderful to have a long term successful relationship with someone else. We can share our lives together and over time develop a closeness that is very rewarding and fulfilling. But if we’re in a relationship that is hurting us or making us feel unworthy, no matter how long we’ve been involved we may change the situation. We can express our feelings and discuss what we need to be happy. If the other person is willing to work with us we may be able to stay in the relationship. However, if after we’ve said what we need they decide they don’t want to change anything we can do what is required to be happy.

It’s easy to get caught up and stay in difficult relationships because we’ve been in them so long they have become routine. Routines may be comforting even when we’re unhappy because we know what to expect. But our happiness is important and every single day we trade it away we lose a precious gift we could give to ourselves. There isn’t anything we can’t do when we’re ready. If we’re unhappy we can change. We deserve the lives we want most and we can give them to ourselves. We don’t have to stay stuck in difficult circumstances. We deserve every happiness and we may opt out and start again at any time.

Today if you’re in a situation where there is discord and you want more happiness in your life, evaluate the situation objectively. There are countless opportunities available for you. You are worth more than you can imagine and deserve to be completely happy. If what you’re doing isn’t working, make a change. You have all the courage and wisdom you need. The world is a better place because you’re here. Today do what is needed to find happiness. Nothing can stop you and you are worth it.

Limits

27 Mar

Life is full of opportunities for growth and learning.  We all have limits we are aware of and some we haven’t yet discovered, but no matter where those limits lie we can push them and stretch them further.  A small life takes little effort to achieve.  We can coast and be comfortable and never try anything new.  It might be simpler to live that way but choosing to stay within pre-set limits restricts us from learning and growing in new ways.  We never really know what we can do if we never step beyond where we’ve been.  We are capable of doing anything we want but it may mean pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones and pressing further than we’ve tried before.  As we stretch forward we may be uncomfortable because we’re in foreign territory and aren’t sure what will happen.  We have enough courage to try anything we really want to do and enough temerity to face any challenge we must to get to a destination.  There are countless things to do and learn, limitless possibilities for our lives and endless chances to try new things.  We can recognize our limits and push forward right through them to something new.  Our lives can be richer and fuller and we can make all our dreams come true.

There is safety in knowing where we are and what to expect.  We know how things will likely go and we feel ready because we’ve been there before.  It’s good to feel safe and we may appreciate the stability of sameness in our lives.  Sameness creates routine and we may change our routines any time we choose.  They are created by repetition and when we’re ready we can start doing things differently and develop new patterns.  It just takes one step in a new direction to change our trajectory a little to the left or right.  One step may open new doors for us and push us in a new direction that will bring fresh opportunities and people into our lives.

Some people change constantly.  They cannot tolerate sameness and are quickly bored.  They push forward and engage in new activities as a matter of course.  Their lives are broad in scope and wide in interpretation because they have opened many doors and continually allowed new ideas to shape them.  We don’t have to push our limits that far to stretch a little further.  We can be open to new experiences at our own pace and learn new things as we feel comfortable.  We can allow new ideas and new patterns to enrich our experiences and help us stretch and learn.  The world has a lot to offer.  We can grab onto new ideas that teach us new things and allow us to grow.

Today if you’ve been keeping your life close and small, take a look around and see what’s there for you.  Open the door a little wider and step a little further away from what is comfortable.  You’ll be amazed at what you discover and how far you can go.  There isn’t anything you can’t do when you’re ready.  Take the first step today.  The whole world is there waiting for you.  Step out and discover something new.

Our Truest Life

1 Jan

“Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.” Henry David Thoreau

When we’re young we dream of what we’ll become when we grow up. We have fantastic fantasies about being ballerinas, astronauts, race car drivers, famous singers, and a thousand other ideas. Sometimes those dreams come true, but often because we don’t know what’s involved in realizing them, they change. Years later as we progress through our lives, learn new things, and learn about ourselves, we get a better picture of who we really are. But even then, because of the complications of life and choices we make, sometimes we don’t end up where we want to be. The roads we want to travel may be obscured by the choices of others around us, or decisions we make that take us to other destinations, or even by time itself. Sometimes we wake up and look at where we are and wonder how we got there. Of course, it’s easy to see how one turn took us to another, and how each step altered our course, but even then, when we realize we’re not where we want to be, it’s disconcerting. Life is a force and if we don’t take control of it, our days will play out and determine our direction. If we want to live our truest life, the one we really want, we have to take control. We have to wake up, look at the road we’re on, and decide which way to go from there.

Living life on “auto pilot” is easy. We’ve all done it from time to time. We get into routines, we know what to expect, and we just go through the motions. But if we live our lives that way, after a time we may forget that we have control and can determine our direction. We can decide what we want and then make choices that will bring success. We can do anything, but we won’t get where we want to be if we don’t take control. Routines can be like fog rolling in. At first we can still see our way forward and it’s just a slight annoyance. But if we let them take over our lives, the path we’re looking for becomes obscured and difficult to see. We might even stop looking because we’ve been on the same road for so long a new choice may be intimidating. But this life only comes around once. We only get one shot at today. We can play along and stay in the fog, or we can step out and forge the road we really want to travel.

Are we living our truest life? We have the power to live the life we want most. However, before we can achieve it, we must first define it. Is what we’re doing today what we really want? Is this the life that will bring us true satisfaction and happiness? If it isn’t, what is needed to change it? We can change anything in our lives that we want to. We can step off the road we’ve been traveling and move in a new direction. We can point our compass toward what we want most and turn our course. We have sufficient control over our choices and our lives to make any change we want to make. If we aren’t happy where we are, if we don’t feel fulfilled, if this isn’t where we want to be, we have the power to change it. We don’t need the approval of others and we don’t need permission. This life is ours to direct and we can go wherever we choose, and become the person we want to be.

Today if you feel like you’re on the wrong road, that you aren’t living your truest life, that you aren’t where you want to be, you can change things. Decide where you want to go and what you want to do, and then begin to modify your direction and revise your plan. You can do anything. You can make your dreams a reality. Be who you really are and bless the world with your unique gifts. There is nobody else like you. Live your truest life today.

When We’re Ready

23 Dec

When we’re hoping for a change in our lives and working to make it happen, it’s frustrating when it eludes us.  When we want something badly it’s hard to wait.  We can try and try to make something happen, but sometimes no matter what we do we remain stuck and nothing changes.  And so we continue to do the other things in our lives that take our attention.  We learn new things and have more experiences moving forward, and after some time passes what we are trying so hard to achieve arrives.  The thing about life is that so often things don’t come to us exactly when we want them, but when we’re ready for them, which isn’t always the same time.  If we’re impatient, waiting is difficult, especially if what we we’re hoping for is something we want very badly and feel we deserve.  But impatience can’t rush anything.  It only makes the wait harder to endure.  Therefore, trying to practice more patience can only help us as we go forward.  It seems counter intuitive that we must exercise patience to become more patient, but that’s how it is.  We can do everything we can to initiate a change, but until we’re ready for it, it probably won’t come.  The trick is to be ready.

Once we’ve identified something we want to change in our lives, if it’s far reaching and requires us to alter our lifestyle or routine, we first need to make that happen to facilitate the change we’re seeking.  If we want to become a doctor, we need to plan and prepare to go to medical school.  If we want to become more social, we need to plan to attend more functions where we can meet others.  We’ll never be ready for any change without the proper preparation.  It seems easy when we first start thinking about it – we’ll just do what’s required.  But when it comes time to implement the alterations, to attend school, to study, to actually go out to the events we need to, sometimes uncertainty creeps in.  An established routine, even one we aren’t happy with, has a degree of security and predictability that makes it comfortable.  We’re familiar with it, we know how it works, and we know what to expect.  When we shake that up, we might find that taking the first step is the hardest.  We don’t really know where it will take us or how we’ll react.  But if we are brave enough to start we often find we are certainly capable of continuing, and because the first step takes us closer to where we want to be, it will bring satisfaction.

The road to change isn’t always easy or quick.  Sometimes what we’re trying to do turns out to be more difficult than we first thought.  And sometimes after we start the new path and look ahead, we see it will take longer than we realized.  But if the goal is something we want, there isn’t anything that can stop us unless we quit.  If we decide it’s too hard or will take too long, we can certainly stop and return to our old patterns.  But if we do that, it means we aren’t ready for the change after all.  And the goal will not be realized until we are.  If we really want to do something, no matter what it is, we can do it.  We just need to keep taking one step forward.  We don’t have to do it in a hurry, and we can take it one day at a time.  There isn’t anything we can’t do.  We can prepare ourselves, and we can be ready.  And when we are, we’ll succeed.

Today if you’ve been wanting a change in your life but aren’t sure you can manage it, remember there is nothing you can’t do.  Every single step will take you closer to your goal, and you can succeed.  Think about where you want to be, and plan to move closer to it no matter what.  If you’re ready, nothing will stop you.  And you can be ready now.  Take the first step today.  Tomorrow take another.  Keep going forward and the goal will come to you.