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Tag Archives: Defend

Wide Open

14 Mar

As we go through our lives, we meet many different kinds of people. Our impressions and interpretations color the way we see the world and those around us, and may lead us to believe something before we have the facts. If we’ve heard many things about someone before we meet them, we may form an idea of who they are and what they’re like before we even say hello. When we do finally meet them, those initial impressions may persist even if they aren’t true. If they’re convincing enough, we may believe they’re entirely different than they are, and attribute positive aspects they don’t possess. The right words and a winning smile can be very influential, and may fool us into believing someone is different than they really are. If we want to believe them it may be difficult to find the truth. We may live in the land of fiction and make excuses when they don’t follow through or look the other way when something doesn’t fit, and we can do that for as long as we like. But truth is powerful and always rises. Even if we’ve been fooled and are completely convinced of something that isn’t real, the truth will show itself. When it does, we’ll have the chance to look openly at the situation and see everything clearly. Truth is always there and when we’re ready we can see everything as it is and determine our next steps forward. If we’ve made a mistake in judgement, we can correct it. If we’ve gone the wrong way, we can turn and redirect the way ahead. A detour isn’t the end of the road, and gives us the chance to adjust our direction to get to the goal. We know where we want to go and what we want to do. Nothing can confuse us or hold us in place indefinitely. We can reach any destination we desire and find success.

Some people struggle with honesty. They may lie because they want something, because the truth is too difficult to face, or because they lack confidence in their decisions. The reasons for dishonesty don’t matter. Nothing can change the truth of any situation and even if a lie prevents it from being clear at the beginning, nothing will keep it from showing itself in the end. Life is filled with complications and sometimes the temptation to get through dishonestly may entice us. Who we are is defined by our choices. We can be firm in our integrity, even when it’s difficult, and make decisions that will enhance our credibility and move us forward with confidence.

If we’ve been fooled or lied to by someone we care about, it may be difficult to face what’s happened. We may try to justify what they’ve done and imagine they didn’t mean to hurt us, but there is no way to defend dishonesty. We can accept what’s happened and learn all that’s possible from the experience and take it forward with us. We deserve the very best of everything and with integrity and wisdom can do what is needed to gain it.

Today if you’ve been lied to and hurt by someone else’s choices, stand firm and go forward with honesty and strength. You are worth every blessing you desire and nothing can keep you from success. Be true to your standards and trust yourself. You know what is right and good, and will reach every destination you desire.

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Deadlock

22 Feb

Everyone has their own opinions and ideas about how things should go. We’re all entitled to our viewpoints and can live our lives any way we choose, but if we must cooperate with others and we disagree, we may get stuck. If agreement is necessary before we can move forward and we can’t find common ground, we will remain in place until something changes. It’s not always easy to find compromise when we are diametrically opposed to the other party’s viewpoint. If we’re on opposing ends of the spectrum, it can be difficult to form an alliance in an effort to move forward. Everyone’s opinion is important, even if we disagree. If we want cooperation, all voices must be heard. We’re all unique and our perceptions are specific to each of us. We can do anything we like individually, but if we’re part of a group, we may need to bend in order to find agreement. There will be few moments when everything goes our way and we get everything we want. Other viewpoints may seem intolerable at first, but by listening carefully and patiently we can find common ground on which to agree. Each side can hold onto what’s most important and relinquish areas of contention in order to move ahead. If we want success, we must learn to compromise effectively. A deadlock situation will hold us in place and keep us from our goals. We are intelligent and have the wisdom we need to find the best arrangement where everyone feels heard and the impasse ends. We can reach any goal we desire by being open to suggestion and allowing others to engage and participate.

If we believe in something strongly and someone questions that belief, we may feel personally assaulted. Our defenses may rise and we may go on the offensive regarding our position. We’re all entitled to our own beliefs and ideas, and it doesn’t matter if others disagree with us. We can listen to opposing viewpoints without being threatened, and if we choose, can modify our stand. But our lives are ours to design and we can make our own choices even if they are in opposition to those around us.

When there are disagreements, it’s up to us how we respond. We can get angry and try to muscle the conversation in our direction. Trying to make others adopt our choice with force rarely works. Instead, if we respond patiently and politely, we may open the conversation effectively and allow everyone to express their own opinions. Respectful discussion can open the door to compromise and help us move closer to our goals. We are smart enough to know how to proceed and with confidence and understanding will reach any destination we desire.

Today if someone else’s ideas are keeping you from moving forward, be receptive to their point of view and express your own ideas confidently and patiently. Find a compromise that lets you step ahead and allows them to hold onto what they need. You are amazing and wise, and will find every answer you need. There isn’t anything that can hold you back from the goals you desire. Speak up and step forward, and you’ll reach success.

Power of Soft

17 Sep

When we have disagreements with others, we can choose to try and keep the conversation calm or we can escalate it. If we’re angry and feel we’re being attacked, we may decide we don’t care and jump in with both feet. It’s easy to react instead of respond calmly. If we’re being yelled at, and we yell back generally things will get worse. And when we’re angry sometimes we don’t care if things worsen. But if our relationship is important to us, we might consider going another way. If we do something to deescalate the issue, we have a better chance of reaching resolution without causing more problems. It is said that a soft voice turns away anger, and that’s often true. When people are angry and upset, they tend to raise their voices. If we return their loud statements with a soft response it changes the dynamic of the exchange. It will be unexpected, and often they will lower their voice as well. Even if they aren’t yelling but are saying unfavorable and contentious things, responding with a soft voice will often keep the situation from intensifying.

Some people are loud by nature. They say things with determination and conviction. They are neither demure nor reserved, and sometimes because of the volume of their voices we may misinterpret their interactions with us. A loud voice doesn’t always mean there is a problem. But if there is an issue, responding with a soft voice when talking to them will get their attention. And when we get their attention, we have the opportunity to resolve any issue more effectively. When we respond quietly in times of conflict, people lean in, and listen. It stops even the most determined and angry, and changes the tone of the interaction.

When we’re angry and upset, sometimes instead of being calm and taking time to think through the issue, we might lash out. We may blast the person we feel caused the problem and let them know, in no uncertain terms, how we feel. When we do that we might feel better, but it rarely helps to solve the problem. If we wait, and take just a moment to collect our thoughts and think about the whole situation before we talk to them, and then use a soft voice, we have a better chance of finding a resolution without making the problem worse. It takes self-control and patience to wait, but we are all capable of handling conflict better, and managing our anger more effectively. Think about using a soft voice when you confront someone you’re angry with. It will calm you down and instead of defending themselves after feeling attacked, they will be able to respond and explain things more clearly.

Today if you are angrily confronted by someone else, try to respond using a soft voice. Be calm and clear, and quietly answer their concerns. You will be in control of the situation and yourself, and you’ll feel more confident and strong. Listen to their complaints and quietly answer their questions. It will diminish the conflict, and help resolve the issue. You can handle any situation that comes up today with a soft voice and quiet demeanor. You will prevail by being in control, and your day will be better and easier because of it.