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Not So Common

6 Jul

We’re all familiar with common sense and generally it’s a good idea to pay attention to it.  When we have a problem, there are things we know will work based on our experiences and the experiences of others.  When we’re confused and trying to find our way, we can use common sense to help figure things out.  But sometimes because we don’t care, or we’re determined to do something a certain way we may ignore the more sensible approach and choose a path that is unproven or unsure.  If we try to outsmart our common sense we might succeed, or we may go down in flames.  We can use our intellect to justify a choice that’s outside the box and risky, or we can just storm ahead for any reason at all.  If we want to we can find lots of reasons for going one way over another.  But common sense is usually sound judgment and oftentimes proven to work.  We can ignore it if we’re determined to go another way, and we can try to outsmart it but that may not take us where we want to go.  We can choose the unknown path over the paved road anytime we want to but the journey will often be more difficult or even treacherous.  If we really want to succeed it’s wise to listen to sound judgment and consider the proven path.

Using our intellect to figure out problems or questions is wise.  We can weigh all the options, consider each solution and determine what works best.  But if our emotions are highly involved in the situation we may not see things clearly.  If we really want something to go a certain way and we aren’t sure it will we may choose answers that are extreme or risky.  We might push the edge of sound reasoning thinking it will help us get what we want.  That might work but if it doesn’t we may find ourselves further from the goal than where we started.  We don’t always have to do things the way they’ve been done before and we can certainly devise any plan we want to.  Sometimes our ideas will work and sometimes they won’t but ignoring answers we know will succeed isn’t generally in our best interest.

Every situation is different and unique and there are always unforeseen complications.  Even if we do everything possible to solve a problem we may still miss the mark.  Thankfully, few decisions we make are etched in stone and unchangeable.  Most often if the first try doesn’t get us where we want to go, we can try again.  We don’t fail unless we quit trying.  We aren’t defeated simply because the first answer didn’t work out.  We can try again.  We can modify our plans, adjust our trajectory, re-direct our course and go forward.  There isn’t anything too complex for us to unravel.  We have everything we need to succeed.

Today if you’re trying to solve a problem and what you’ve done so far isn’t working, think about the issue openly and see if there isn’t an answer you’ve missed.  Think about what’s worked in the past and consider the situation logically.  You’ll find the solution and successfully work the problem.  You are wise enough and smart enough to figure out anything that comes and you will succeed.

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Making it Right

4 Jul

We make a lot of decisions in our lives. Sometimes we choose well, and other times we may struggle to find our way. We make a lot of choices and it seems obvious that choosing the right way will take us where we want to go and choosing the wrong way won’t. But life is complicated and there may be times when we convince ourselves that taking a wrong turn will take us to our destination. We can believe that going one way will eventually take us another. If we only focus on what we want and all we see is the prize, we may choose a path we believe will get us there quickly without seeing the whole picture. We can choose any road we want and do anything we like but a wrong choice, although it might be the quickest answer or the easiest, will never be the best decision. Nobody is immune from making mistakes but we have a better shot at getting things right if we take our time and choose carefully. If we rush, or if all we can see is the finish line we may take a wrong turn that in the end may cost us more than we imagined.

We understand how to get from point A to point B when we plan a trip. If it’s a road trip we plot the course that will get us there most effectively. If we want to travel north, we don’t choose roads that go east or west or south. We choose the roads that take us north to our appointed destination. But it can sometimes be difficult to use the same simple logic when making our personal decisions. There may be others involved, or complications we have to navigate around, and sometimes we only have a general idea of where we want to be. If we are desperate to reach a goal, we may take chances on paths that are undefined or unproven that cause us to fail. We are all capable of making excellent decisions but it takes determination and a clear understanding of our situation to ensure we get there.

It’s impossible to turn a bad decision into a good one. Making decisions are the most important things we do every day. They determine where we go and have influence over what happens next. If we blunder blindly through and carelessly choose this or that, trying to patch our way from one step to another, our lives will be convoluted and confusing. We create unnecessary drama when we don’t proactively choose our course. Bad decisions can be powerful deterrents. They can prevent us from moving forward, hold us down when we want to get up, and create congestion that prevents us from seeing clearly. If we take the time we need to see everything openly and determine exactly how we want to move forward, we can often prevent complications and enable success. We can do anything and we can do it well. If we are careful, we can make excellent decisions that take us where we want to go and bring us happiness.

Today if you’ve been stopped by a choice that took you to a dead end instead of a clear path, redirect your course. Think about the best way forward and begin again. There isn’t anything you can’t do. You know where you want to go and you know how to get there. Change your direction until you find the best way forward and then start walking. You’ll find the right road and every success.

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Grape Juice

1 Jul

Grape juice is delicious.  It’s sweet and tasty and very refreshing.  But if we spill it on our white cotton shirt, it’s quickly changes from being a treat to being a curse.  Grape juice is nice to drink but spilled on white cotton can create an indelible stain that is nearly impossible to remove.  It leaves evidence, sometimes forever, that it was there.  We may scrub and try all kinds of applications and still the stain may remain.  In our lives when we make a mistake that hurts us or others deeply we may feel like we’ve created a permanent stain.  There is no way to change what has happened, and we might believe there is no way to recover from the decision.  Thankfully, even if the mistake is damaging and difficult, it’s not like grape juice.  It’s not forever.  There isn’t anything we can’t recover from.  We all make mistakes and if we’ve really blundered and seriously caused pain to ourselves or others it may be difficult to repair the damage.  But we can face difficult challenges and find our way through them.  If we seriously want to make things right again and do what is needed to correct the problem, we can navigate it effectively and move forward.  What we learn from the experience will be valuable, and even if there is some residual stain that stays with us, it will never be so intense that we can’t find a way around it.

We make dozens of decisions every day.  Our lives change continually based on those decisions and the decisions of others.  Sometimes things go well, we can clearly see the path forward, and know what to do.  Other times our vision may be clouded with indecision, confusion or complications out of our control.  Even if we try to make the best decisions possible, sometimes we won’t have all the information, or what we have is incorrect.  As we go forward we may stumble and take a wrong turn and get hurt, and we may fall on others and hurt them as well.  Nobody wants to make bad choices on purpose.  We try to do our best but it’s possible to get lost.  Getting lost doesn’t mean we’re lost forever.  It just means we took a wrong turn.  We are perfectly capable of assessing the situation, looking at our options, and choosing the road that will correct our course and get us back on track to where we want to go.  We can keep moving forward even after a serious detour.  We have everything we need to find our way again, and we can get to the destination successfully.

If we make a bad choice that is so egregious we break a connection to someone else, we may have to go forward without them for a while.  If no matter what we’ve tried to repair the relationship they don’t want any association with us, we may accept that for now and still move forward.  We can’t control decisions made by anyone but ourselves.  We can give them time and distance if they need it and do whatever we can to make things right.  Everyone makes mistakes and although some may take time to recover from, we are capable of correcting our course at any time.

Today if you’re recovering from a mistake in judgment, and you feel like you’re stained forever, remember this is not permanent. You can correct your course and make things right again.  Keep moving forward.  You have everything you need to succeed.

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In the Middle

17 Jun

There are times in our lives when decisions must be made that affect others involved.  When everyone agrees on the same choice it’s easy to move forward and get things done.  But we’re all different and our ideas about how things should go sometimes don’t match.  We may feel our solution is best and then be confronted with someone who disagrees.  If the choices are vastly different, there may be conflict as the final decision is determined.  We all understand that compromises must be made from time to time but if we feel strongly about going a certain direction and someone else feels strongly about going the opposite way it may be hard to find common ground.  And sometimes there isn’t anything common within the choices.  When that happens we can find a way to go forward by looking for a solution somewhere in the middle of both directions.  It won’t be exactly the way we want it but it won’t be exactly the other way either.  We can give and take some control.  We don’t have to give it all up but we can’t take it all either.  Finding the middle allows both sides to compromise without giving up anyone’s entire choice.  It isn’t always easy, especially if strong feelings are involved, but it is the best way to ensure we continue to move forward.  If we dig in and refuse to give up anything we’ll end up stuck and that gets us nowhere.

If we find ourselves in a situation where we absolutely believe we are right and the other side is completely wrong it may be hard to hear why we should alter our decision.  Our choice may be an excellent option but rarely is there only one way to get anything done.  There are many ways to do everything and although our ideas may be great, it’s important to remember there are lots of great ideas.  If we openly listen to all the options presented and take the time to really understand another perspective we will more easily be able to compromise.  Allowing all the other points of view to be considered opens the door for new perspectives.  And those new perspectives teach us more about the situation and the options available.

Sometimes we may feel there is only one answer for a problem we’re facing.  There is only one way we can see to get through it.  When that happens if we patiently explain our position and why we believe it must go that way others will be more receptive to our solution than if we simply tell them this is the way it’s going to go.  We all deserve to be heard.  Finding the place in the middle is possible if we respect everyone’s opinion as much as our own.  Even when we’re sure we’re right, sometimes after hearing another viewpoint we may see where we could modify and find an even better solution.  Listening allows us to hear.  And hearing all the possibilities helps us find the best answers.  We are fully capable of making our own decisions but we are also capable of collaborating those decisions when needed.  Collaboration brings a more cooperative partnership and helps us move forward more effectively.

Today if you’ve made a decision and you’re sure it’s the best way but others disagree, listen to their perspective and understand their point of view.  You’ll learn more and your views will broaden.  Stretch your vision to find a compromise that works for everyone and you’ll feel more support and unity going forward.  We’re all in this together.  Join hands with those around you to get the job done.

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Detours

8 Jun

When we have goals we want to achieve and we’re focusing on them we may make a lot of progress going forward.  Everything may move along as planned but then something happens that stops us.  Maybe it’s an unexpected change in plans or a decision we make that takes us off the road for a time.  For instance, if we’re trying to lose weight and we’re doing well and happy with our progress we may have a setback if someone bakes us a delicious chocolate cake.  If we love chocolate cake we may decide we’ll have only one small piece but it was so good we have another, and then another.  Or if we’re trying to manage our time more effectively and are having success with getting things done as planned but then there’s a movie marathon we don’t want to miss.  It completely ruins our schedule as we spend hours and hours enjoying all the films.  These are just detours and taking a detour off the road we’ve chosen doesn’t mean we’ve forsaken the journey.  It’s just a momentary pause.  We can choose anything we want any time we want and sometimes our choices take us from our long range goals.  There is nothing wrong with stepping off the path we’ve set, and if we want to find success we can step back on it again.

We can set our standards so rigidly that if we waiver from the course we’ve designed we may feel defeated and convinced we can’t succeed.  Of course that isn’t true.  We can do anything we want to do.  There is plenty of time to redirect our course and get back on the road we most want to travel.  Stepping off and taking a detour doesn’t end the journey.  The road is still there waiting for us to return.  If we really want to accomplish the task, and if we really want the change in our lives we can find our way back to it and begin again.  There is no hard line in the sand.  We can step off the path and step right back onto it again when we’re ready.

We face detours regularly in our lives.  Things come up that distract us, people and events capture our attention, and life happens.  It’s impossible to set a course and stay on it perfectly every moment of every day.  We can decide on our goals and make a plan and if things happen that confound it we can work around them.  There are few straight lines in life.  Most of the time we get from point to point by going a little here and a little there.  It doesn’t matter how we get there and unless there is some time constraint it doesn’t matter how long it takes.  The important thing is to decide what we want, and then move toward it.  There will be detours from time to time and we can manage them as they come.  We can take as long as we need to return to where we were and start again.  The journey can continue any time we’re ready.  There isn’t anything we can’t accomplish.  We can be confident that no matter what comes we will manage it.  We are capable of achieving anything we set our minds to.

Today if you’ve been derailed from a plan you’ve set for yourself you can get back on course again.  Decide how you want to go forward and start again.  You’ve come so far already.  Nothing will stop you from achieving your goals.  You have everything you need to succeed.  Step back on the path and start again.

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