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Step One

16 Nov

We have a lot of goals in our lives. There are many things we think about, things we want to do, and things we want to achieve. But having a goal is just the first step in accomplishing anything. Thinking about what we want to do is fine, but if we’re serious about achieving it, we have to do more. The famous French writer Antoine de Saint-Exupery said, “A goal without a plan is just a wish.” And that’s true. It’s fun to wish for things but if we want our wishes to become reality, we need to make a plan to accomplish them and then implement it. It takes action to succeed in anything. We can dream and wish and hope for things to happen, but nothing will ever change until we do something to make the change a reality.

When we seriously want something in our lives, we must do what it takes to get it. Sometimes it’s necessary to change what we’re used to or what we’ve been comfortable with.  Maybe we have to give up some free time, or we have to step out of our comfort zone and extend ourselves to those we don’t know. Maybe we have to let go of some long held fear. When what we really want means a great deal to us, we can make those sacrifices. But if we have to do something that scares us, or we’re intimidated by the process needed to get to the goal, it may take more courage than we initially anticipated. And then we’ll have to determine how much we want to succeed. If we really want to go forward, there is nothing that will stand in our way. We will do what it takes, no matter what that entails.

There is nothing we can’t do if we want to badly enough. There is no obstacle so large that it will prevent us from achieving our goal. We can do anything. But we must decide what we really want. They say we always do what we want to do most. That seems evident. If we say we want to change but keep doing the same things, the real truth is that we want things to stay the same. If we really want to change we have to embrace it and do what is needed to make it happen. If we keep doing the same things over and over again, change will never happen. Even if we talk about what we want to do, even if we think about it constantly, even if we dream about it, if we do nothing to change where we are, we will never achieve it.

Today if you’ve been dreaming about a change you want in your life, if you’ve been wishing for it and thinking about it, do one thing that will take you closer to it. Take the first step to start moving forward to the goal, and set a date to accomplish it. Then start doing what is needed to make it a reality. With every step you take you’ll be closer than you were before. You can do anything. Start now. There is nothing that will stop you or stand in your way. You have everything you need to succeed.

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Authentic

14 Nov

There are a lot of influences in our lives, and sometimes there may be pressure to be some version of ourselves that isn’t quite genuine. Others may want us to be like them because they feel more comfortable when everyone around them reflects their personal style or preferences. Sometimes there is pressure to conform to some idea that is the norm, and even if we don’t really want to, we may go along so we fit in. Although we all know it’s best to be honest, when we care about someone and they are insistent, it can be hard to speak up. If we concede and do what is expected instead of genuinely being who we are, we put ourselves into false situations that may not work out for us. If we live a life designed by someone else, it isn’t ours. And living our own lives, our way, is the most important thing we can do. We are unique and have a lot to offer just as we are. We can be who we really are, and be confident even if it’s not what others want.

When we are trying to figure out who we really are, we try on different lifestyles and choices until we find what fits. Sometimes that matches those around us, and sometimes it doesn’t. Once we figure out what works for us, it feels perfect and even if it’s not the norm, we can embrace it. We don’t have to reflect what anyone else thinks we should be. We don’t have to be married, single, conservative, liberal, quiet or outspoken just because those around us would be more comfortable. We can be respectful and kind, and do exactly what’s best for us. If we conform to a model that isn’t genuine, we may be able to make it work for a time, but eventually who we really are will emerge. We are entitled to be authentic about ourselves, and be truthful and open. Unless we’re hurting someone, the opinions of others don’t matter.

Sometimes we’re the ones who put pressure on ourselves to be a certain way, and try to fit a mold that isn’t exactly right. There might be family pressures, or the desire to fit in. We can try to assimilate and if we want to change we certainly can. But if the change is too dramatic, or we aren’t completely convinced we want to be that different, even if we accomplish it, it’s doubtful we’ll be happy. We deserve to be happy every day. Trying to be something we aren’t will never take us there. We know who we are and we know what works for us. We can be that person and we don’t have to fit any other model no matter how convincing it is.

Today be the person you really are. You are perfect just being you. Be confident in your true self. Be genuine and open. You have a lot to offer, and offering it with your own authentic twist is the best you can give. Your uniqueness is valuable and worthwhile. Embrace it and confidently share it with everyone around you.

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One Star

12 Nov

When we’re looking for direction or trying to find our way through something in our lives, there are a lot of options available to us. There are countless roads we could choose and limitless paths we could follow. When we really want to make the best decision, and we’re struggling to find our way, all those choices can be overwhelming. Sometimes we just want someone to tell us how to do it, and which way to go. But the decision must be ours and although we may get a lot of advice, we need to choose the direction ourselves. There are billions of stars in the sky. They are all beautiful and each is perfect in its own way. When we’re looking for an answer, it’s like identifying the one single star that will guide us. We need to find what fits and what will take us exactly where we want to go. It takes a little time to figure it out, but once we’ve identified it, is easier to move forward.

Making decisions when the stakes are high can be complicated. We can get lost worrying about outcomes and impact. We can get frozen in time and unable to move forward because we don’t really know what will happen. But we don’t have to get stuck. We can take the time needed to make the best choice, and then no matter what comes, we will handle it. There is no way to know where every road will take us. We can try hard to see the future based on our experiences from the past, and that will help. But with all the variables we face every day, nothing is certain. So, taking some time and evaluating the best plan forward is all we can do. Once we’ve determined that, we can boldly proceed, confident that we chose wisely, and let things play out accordingly.

If we are lost and completely unsure, we can get help. We can ask those we trust, we can talk to someone who has faced a similar situation, we can get professional advice or whatever else will aid us in determining our way forward. Most people are willing to help when asked, and there is a lot of experience we may draw from. If the situation is personal, and we don’t want to talk about it with others, we must rely on personal experience and careful thought. We are capable of making excellent decisions. There is one star out there, shining down on us, with all the wisdom and inspiration we need to go forward. Sometimes we just need to look up, and listen to find the answer.

Today if you’re pondering a heavy decision and aren’t sure which way to go, take some time to listen to your heart, and consider all your options. You’ll figure this out. You will make an excellent decision. You are far wiser and more capable than you think you are. You know where you want to go, and you will choose the best road to take you there.

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Missed a Step

10 Nov

Mistakes are a part of life. Despite our best efforts, we all make them from time to time. Perfection is the goal, but not the achievement, and so, sometimes we miss a step. When they are huge blunders that affect others, we feel badly, and the clean-up process can take some time. But even when we make small mistakes they can slow down our progress and we may feel frustrated. Mistakes happen and are a natural consequence of trying to find our way. What’s important isn’t the fact that we make them but how we respond to them. If we let them overcome us and undermine our confidence, they can have far reaching consequences. But if we see them for what they are, and learn as much as possible from them, they can, in the end, be blessings in disguise. After all, this life is a learning process and we are going to stumble from time to time.

Since we’re all human, and subject to error, nobody is exempt from occasionally missing the mark. It’s important to remember that when others falter and impact us. Belittling or criticizing because of a mistake will never fix the problem. Most of us don’t want to screw up, and generally try to do our best. But even with the best laid plans, sometimes things go wrong. Perhaps it’s because we didn’t get all the information we needed at the beginning. Or maybe we misjudged a situation and thought things were different than they really were. And there is always the possibility that someone else influences the decision and causes us to fail. There are a thousand ways to bungle every choice we make and none of us is immune.

Learning to be patient when we stumble is sometimes difficult, especially if we’re trying to impress or improve ourselves. It’s hard to face a setback when we’re trying hard to move forward. But the course of our lives will never be exactly even and predictable. We need patience to help us through the bumps. Sometimes it’s easier to forgive others than it is to forgive ourselves, but we deserve the same consideration we extend. We can do everything in our power to make sure our decisions are flawless and sometimes we’ll succeed. But sometimes we are going to falter, and when that happens it’s important to remember all the times we did things well. Nobody is right or wrong all the time. We get some of each – all the time.

Today if you’re feeling bad because you made a mistake, and you’ve lost some confidence, don’t forget all the times you got it right. You make great decisions, and most of the time you succeed. If you’ve had a stumble, correct your course and go forward with courage. You haven’t lost everything. You really can do anything. You know what needs to be done. Stand up straight and start again.

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Fact or Fiction

7 Nov

People have a lot of opinions and some of them involve us. They see us do things or hear us say something and draw conclusions about who we are. Sometimes they’re right, but sometimes their interpretations of what we’re doing are inaccurate. Unfortunately, once they’ve made up their mind about us, they may share their perceptions with others, and before we know it people may think we are someone very different that who we really are. It isn’t always bad. Sometimes they are wrong in ways that make us look better, but other times they may assume we’re doing something inappropriate, wrong, or distasteful. When that happens, we can be hurt by the stories people tell about us. Even when there is no truth to the rumors, they can hurt us, and damage our confidence.

We are the only ones who know who we really are. We share our lives with others, and even when we share ourselves in intimate relationships, nobody can know us like we do. We know our thoughts, our motives, our intentions and we know what we want and what we believe. Our outward actions only tell part of the story, and when they are misread, can tell a story that has nothing to do with the truth. It becomes a question of fact or fiction. We always know the facts but unless we’re clear in expressing them, fiction may take over. Lives can be destroyed by rumors, and spirits can be broken. It’s imperative that we do everything we can not to spread them, and if we are the subject of them, do everything we can to clear up the distortion. We need to speak up and correct any misconceptions, and hold fast to what is real.

There may be times when stories about us, even when they aren’t true, make us question ourselves. After all, if others believe we are a certain way, we might think there must be some truth to it. There is a minute bit of truth in almost all fiction, but that doesn’t make the entire tale true. We need to stand strong in being ourselves. In the end it really doesn’t matter what other people think or what they say about us. If we continue to live our lives authentically, in accordance with our personal goals and desires, those around us, even those who initially believed fiction, will come to know the facts. And when they do, they’ll see us clearly and without misinterpretation.

Today if you’ve been injured by stories about you, if someone misunderstands you or what you’re doing, you can be strong, knowing the truth. You know who you are and any fiction floating around means nothing. Be courageous in being uniquely you. Be open and honest about yourself, and those around you will come to understand exactly how impressive you really are. Live your life exactly as you choose. You are a gift to the world. Never forget that.

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