Tag Archives: Peace

Tumbling

14 Dec

When problems surround us and we’re overwhelmed, it can feel like we’re tumbling in the surf being rolled over and over again by the pounding waves. The undercurrent captures us and pulls us deeper into the struggle and we tire trying to keep our heads above water. Every moment is an endurance test and there are times when it’s hard to find air to breathe. We fight against the power threatening to crush us and we reach for something, anything to grab onto that will give us sufficient stability to continue on. When our world is in turmoil we may feel we’re careening toward catastrophe and it’s hard to make sense of what’s in front of us. Our vision is clouded by the swirling thoughts of where we are and how we’ll find our way through. Although it’s hard to see an end to the struggle, if we hang on and trust our abilities to navigate whatever has taken hold of us, we will prevail. Even the strongest waves must ebb and in time we will find our way to solid ground again. Life is filled with challenge and trials. They rarely come when we’re ready for them but no matter how deep the water is, we can find our way to the surface and get to the shore.

The old adage of Murphy’s Law that if anything can go wrong it will, sometimes seems to be the rule of the day. There may be times where it seems no matter what we do we can’t win. It’s like we’ve somehow gotten out of sync with the universe. Our friends argue with us, our family is frustrated with us, our jobs are driving us nuts, our cars break down, our faucets leak and we can’t find our keys. One thing at a time is easy to face but sometimes everything seems to go wrong at once. The universe really hasn’t turned against us but we may feel inundated with trouble and exhausted trying to handle it all. When that happens, it may be hard to get through each moment trying to figure out what to do next. But we’ve been through enough trials already to know we’ll survive. We have everything we need to overcome whatever problems arise and if we are patient and take our time we’ll find all the answers we need.

Life is all about change and learning to adapt. It’s a constant process of learning to let go and move forward. When we have a lot of challenges and feel overwhelmed it can be hard to find respite and peace. Every problem that comes brings something we must learn and overcome in order to proceed. Every time we solve a complication we have more information and increased understanding that will help us going forward. Even when we feel we can’t manage, we do. Even we feel we’re overcome, we prevail. There really isn’t anything too difficult for us to manage. Nobody wants to go through heavy problems but we have all the courage we need to do so. Confidence will give us the boost we need to move forward and when we trust in our abilities to cope we will have all the confidence we need.

Today if you’re facing a big problem and feel swallowed up by the tide, grab onto the things you already know and begin forward. You have all the wisdom you need to overcome. You are capable and strong. Press forward and have faith. You will prevail. There isn’t anything you can’t do.

Not This Again

27 Apr

We learn a lot as we go through our lives. Each day brings opportunities to learn new things, develop new skills and new behaviors. Sometimes trials come upon us and we try to overcome them, or solve them, or just try to get through them. But we all have lessons to learn. If we learn what is needed to get through a situation, we can move forward. No matter what problems come upon us, they aren’t permanent and will eventually go away again. However, if we didn’t learn anything from the experience, and only endured it until it changed, odds are good we’ll get to go through it again. Life has a way of looping our problems back around when we don’t figure out how to solve them.  If we never change our patterns or response to an issue, it may become a recurring nightmare. Given that, it’s in our best interest to try and not only endure our problems, but take the time to figure out why we have them, and then do what is needed to solve them once and for all.

Practice is the key to proficiency in most cases. When we’re learning a new skill the more we do it, the better we get at it. Repetition helps us remember how things are done and effectively teaches us new patterns. But repetition in our problems isn’t always pro-active. Having the same problem over and over doesn’t make us better people. It doesn’t make us proficient at anything but going through the same thing again and again. If we find ourselves in a familiar situation that is unpleasant and difficult to manage, the familiarity is our clue that we have something to learn. If we look at the situation objectively we can identify what we need to do to prevent it from returning.  Identifying the underlying issue is just the first step though. After we see what needs to change to prevent the same problem from recurring, we must adopt the change to end it. Just understanding what causes the situation is never enough. If we want to stop repeating the same behaviors, we actually have to stop repeating the same behaviors.

We are in charge of our lives. Sometimes the difficult issues we face over and over again come to us because of our associations with others. Perhaps they aren’t the best influence in our lives, maybe they have personal issues that impact us, or maybe they exercise authority over us in unproductive ways. If contact with them brings us hardship we may choose to distance ourselves from them or eliminate our interactions altogether. If the relationship is important to us, or has been in our lives for a long time, that decision may be difficult. We don’t want to hurt others but it’s important to recognize when our relationships are hurting us. If they are, we can modify them so we can move forward. We know what we need better than anyone else. If we need a change, we can make it. We are completely capable of managing our lives in positive and beneficial ways that bring us happiness and peace.

Today if you’re facing the same problem you’ve faced before and want to move forward, look at the situation clearly and see what you need to do to change. You can make any change you need to be happy. You are capable of understanding what needs to be done. Learn everything you can this time around and solve the problem once and for all. Look ahead and see where you want to be. And then, do what it takes to get there.

Intentions

1 Mar

There are a lot of things we all want to do in our lives. We accomplish some of them, we plan for some of them, and we let some of them go as we change. Sometimes we intend to do certain things but for reasons we didn’t plan on, can’t explain, or don’t want to explore we don’t do them. They say, “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Good intentions are things we plan to do that will benefit us or others in some way. There is nothing wrong with having good intentions, and when we say we’ll do something most of the time we sincerely intend to do it. But there are times when because of pressure from others, or situations we aren’t quite ready to face, we might agree to something or promise something we know we’ll never actually do. Perhaps we agree because something important depends on it and we don’t want to lose that, or it will get everyone to stop asking. Or maybe we go along because it’s important to someone we love, and although we really have no intention of following through, it will buy us the time we think we need to get what we want. The road to hell is what we end up on when we continually break our word, and don’t follow through on what we’ve said we’d do. Others stop trusting us, and we lose credibility with those we care most about. If we continue doing this, we may even lose our relationships with them.

What we say is important. It gives others a view of who we could be but not necessarily who we are. Who we really are isn’t what we say, but what we actually do. Talking only goes so far and doesn’t make anything happen. If all we do is talk about what we want, and how we feel, but do nothing, and make promises we never intend to keep, eventually nobody will believe anything we say. All the beautiful words in the world don’t mean anything unless we follow them up with action. If we say we love someone but do nothing to show that love, never see them, don’t spend time with them, and are never available for them, all our professions of love, no matter how tender and beautiful, mean nothing. Our actions tell the real truth.

There are a lot of reasons why we sometimes say things and don’t follow through. Our lives are complicated, our relationships can be complicated too, and if we feel pressure to be a certain way or do certain things, even if we don’t want to, we may agree. But
when we say we’ll do something and then don’t do it, we are responsible for that decision. It may be easier to go along in the beginning, but it makes us dishonest with those around us in the end. We need to be honest in all our decisions, and we have sufficient courage to do that. We are entitled to our personal choices even if they are different than what those close to us want us to do. Our lives belong to us and we own every decision we make. We can do things our way with confidence and we can honestly say no when we need to. We can choose to live our lives with integrity and truth. When we do, we’ll step off the road to hell and onto the road to happiness. And being on the road to happiness is the best place to be.

Today if you’ve been saying you’ll do something to keep the peace or get what you want, but have no intention of following through, choose to be honest. Clear the deception and be truthful about what you want and what you’ll do. You have everything you need to be the best you can be. Today choose well. You’ll feel better and those around you will appreciate your integrity.

Easy Way Out

2 Feb

Life is complicated and sometimes we find ourselves in situations that aren’t working for us and we want to change. We’re in charge of our lives and can change anything we wish, but it isn’t always easy. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable to make changes, especially when others are involved. For instance, if we’re in a relationship that isn’t working and we no longer want to continue. The best we can do is to be honest and upfront, and tell the other person how we feel and that we want to move on in another direction. But sometimes we may think that’s too difficult, so instead we dodge them, stand them up for dates we’ve made, or don’t answer their calls. If we do that, we figure eventually they’ll get the idea and we’ll have made our exit without the uncomfortable conversation. We might think that’s the easy way out, but really it’s just the coward’s way out, and we can all do better than that. In most situations when we need to make a definite change, there really is no easy way out. If we want to handle it well, we have to be courageous and honest enough to state our feelings clearly, and then move forward on a new road.

Nobody wants to hurt others. We don’t want to make people feel bad, and we never want to be the bad guy. But if we need a change, and if we aren’t honest about it we have only two other options. We can continue to pretend that everything is fine, which never works over time, or we can try to find an easy way out, which often hurts everyone more in the end. We all have sufficient courage to stand up for what is right, and be honest. If the situation has been going on for a long time it will be harder than if it’s been a brief interchange. But long or short, if it has to change, we need to be open enough to make that happen. If we clearly, and openly express our feelings and explain what we want going forward, the other person may be hurt, but they will respect our honesty. They may not like what we have to say, but they will understand our decision.

Many of us are resistant to change. When things stay the same we know what to expect and that makes us comfortable. But we deserve to be happy, and if we aren’t happy with the way our lives are going we can make whatever changes are needed to bring happiness to us. It may be uncomfortable to initiate the change, and feel awkward at first while we set up new patterns, and decide on a new course, but if the end result is personal happiness, it’s worth whatever it takes. Change is a normal part of life. We all experience it every day. Life is fluid and the only thing we can really count on is that whatever we’re going through today will change at some point. If we decide we need to, we can make that change come sooner rather than later. This life is a gift. We only get one chance to live each day. It’s not worth wasting a single moment in a situation that makes us unhappy. We are in control of our lives and we can design them any way we want to. We have all the courage we need to correct any situation we’re in.

Today if you’re unhappy with a situation in your life, you can change it. Be honest and open about how you feel and what you want going forward. Asking for what you want doesn’t make you the bad guy. You deserve every happiness. Your life is precious. Don’t waste another moment being unhappy. Change what needs to be changed, and you’ll find the peace and comfort you deserve.

Knowing

8 Jan

As we go through all the many experiences in our lives, we sometimes come across situations that confuse us.  Maybe we aren’t sure exactly what’s going on, or something someone says doesn’t agree with what they’re doing.  Because most of the experiences we have involve other people, and they can do anything they like even if it doesn’t make sense, it’s sometimes hard to understand situations.  Some people may pretend that things are different than they really are and try to convince us that everything is one way when in fact it’s the complete opposite.  Some people may even lie to us, and manipulate us into believing things that aren’t true.  When we’re unsure because things aren’t making sense, when we can’t believe something is happening but all the evidence points in that direction, we can feel lost.  We don’t know which way to turn.  We don’t know what to do.

When we’re confused about a situation, it’s helpful to take a step back away from it and see it more objectively.  We can more easily discern truth if our emotions aren’t involved.  When we’re tangled up and enmeshed in a situation, we may be too close to see the whole story.  If we step back just a little our vision will clear, and we may see things we couldn’t before.  People are complicated and make all kinds of decisions – both good and bad.  Their reasons are their own, and if the reason is selfish, it can hurt others.  Sometimes they don’t care if they hurt others and will continue even after they see the pain they’re causing.  And sometimes the pain is just a byproduct of what they’re trying to do.  Either way, if we’re in their crosshairs and are getting hurt, we can find out why.  We can step back and see things clearly, and then we can make the best decision going forward.

There are times when what we think is happening can be an illusion created by a situation or those involved in it.  It’s possible to be manipulated into believing things are very different than they really are.  Perhaps someone wants something from us and knows we will never give it to them unless we believe it’s for someone else so they manufacture a situation that gives that impression.  Or maybe someone wants us to do something they know we won’t agree to and make the request appear to be something entirely different.  If these things happen we can get caught going down a path we never intended to travel.  There really is no limit to what others can do or say to us.  But we can figure out the truth if we step back when we feel something isn’t right.  We can trust our instincts to know what is real, and when we’re ready, we can uncover the truth.  We will know what to do.  We have everything we need to discern the right path, and then go forward.  We can correct our course at any time, and turn back to the right direction to find peace and happiness.

Today if you feel something isn’t quite right in a situation involving you, and if you’re unsure, step back a little and see it more objectively.  Pretend you’re not involved and see everything clearly.  You’ll find the truth and you’ll know what to do.  You are insightful and wise.  You have everything you need to go forward with confidence.