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New Roads

20 Oct

As we go through our lives we attend to many things. We may have a family, a career, a business, and plans for the future, and many of us stay quite busy. Sometimes as we grow and change we find the life we’re living isn’t bringing us the happiness we desire. Maybe our dreams have changed. Maybe our situation has made things different. Maybe we’re bored and want to try something new. We may decide to completely change our direction in order to be happy. We may turn all the way around and go another way on a new road. We can certainly change anything in our lives but turning our course takes determination and resolve. New roads are uncharted territory. We have no idea what lies ahead but there is nothing we can’t face and overcome and if we want a change we can surely have it. We can turn and reroute our lives in a new direction. If we do, those around us may not understand our decision and may try to dissuade us. It’s easier to keep things as they are and many people prefer the status quo. But we don’t need anyone’s permission or approval to make personal decisions in our lives. If we want to go another way, we can.

When we’re young we have all kinds of dreams about how our lives will go. Many of those dreams fade as we grow into adulthood and hear again and again that we should be sensible and think of the future. It’s wise to plan for the future and using common sense is in our best interest. We may follow everyone else’s advice about what we should do and where we should go. But if we want something different and we don’t feel like those plans fit, we can change and go another way. Even if we’ve been on the same road for years, and even if everyone thinks we’re doing great, if we aren’t truly happy we can change. We are in control of our lives and deserve to be happy. Choosing a road that will bring happiness is up to us.

Sometimes the life we want most doesn’t look like the regular plan, or is different than what others think we need. It really doesn’t matter what everyone else thinks our lives should look like. What matters is that we live our lives our own way. We all deserve to be truly happy and we can only achieve that if we are true to ourselves. Our dreams and desires are unique to each of us and we are entitled to them even if they don’t fit the norm. We can take another road at any time. Every moment is precious and we can make the most of them by being true to who we are and what we want. Our lives belong to us and we may design them any way we choose. We can do things our way and we can be happy. It doesn’t matter how long we’ve traveled the road we’re on. If we want to turn and try a new one, we can.

Today if you feel like you’re on the wrong road and want a change you can choose a new direction. You can do anything you want. You have all the wisdom you need to make the best choices going forward. You deserve complete happiness. Find the road that will bring it to you and begin the journey.

Now or Never

1 Aug

Our lives are busy and our days are filled with things we need and want to do.  Time flies by and sometimes we get so busy and distracted we barely notice what’s right in front of us.  We’re focused on the next thing to do and the next place to go and we may be blind to what is happening now.  As each day passes it is gone forever and if we rush through our days without paying attention we will miss the chance to experience everything possible.  It’s easy to get caught up in what’s happening next and completely miss where we are now but where we are now is important.  We can take a moment to really see what’s happening, smell the fresh air, and listen to the sounds that surround us.  We can breathe in the experience of our present and live it fully.  There is so much to learn and see and do every day, and if we take the time to be in the moment, exactly where we are, our lives will be richer.

The only thing certain in life is change.  Nothing stays the same.  We can’t freeze any moment or experience, and we can’t stop time.  It’s ever moving forward to something else.  Our lives change constantly.  If we rush through our moments pressing forward we may accomplish many things, but if we don’t notice what’s happening along the way the experiences we miss may be gone forever.  The richness and depth of living fully in the moment blesses us in many ways.  We feel things more deeply, we see things more clearly, and we hear sounds we may miss in the rush.  The taste of food, the sights in nature, the smell of something wonderful, and sounds all around us may be overlooked as we hurry along.  But all those things and innumerable other experiences embellish our lives and bring joy.  If we concentrate on being in the moment, wherever we are, and being fully aware of everything around us our lives will be richer and more fulfilling.

We often have a lot to do, goals we want to achieve, places we want to go, people we want to see, and dozens of other activities.  All those things are important and we can strive to meet them.  But our lives are precious and fleeting.  Every moment we’re here we have the chance to experience something wonderful and we can recognize those opportunities more fully if we’re paying attention.  We can deepen our lives by looking around and experiencing everything where we are.  It only takes a second to look up.  Being in the moment and savoring it will bring us great joy.  This life is a tremendous gift.  Each day, and each moment is precious.  If we remember that and experience our days to the fullest, our experience here will be magnificent.

Today if you’ve been rushing around and hardly noticing what is happening as you press forward, look around.  Experience your moments fully.  There is so much around you that will bring you joy.  Take the time to notice where you are and what is happening.  You’ll be happier and more fulfilled as you go.

Birds of a Feather

14 Jul

We associate with all kinds of people throughout our lives. Some are family, some are friends, some are lovers, some are acquaintances, and some may even be enemies. Except for family situations or times when we must associate with someone because of a job or other activity, we may choose with whom we spend our time. It’s wise to think about the behaviors and choices of those we share our lives with. We all influence the world in many ways and personal influence can be very powerful. If we frequently associate with someone whose choices are negative, they may, over time, become a detrimental influence in our lives. There is an old saying, “Birds of a feather flock together.” It obviously means people who share the same types of preferences and choices tend to spend time together. It’s fun to share our time with others who enjoy our company and like the same things we do. But if we are in relationships with someone who is making bad choices, or whose behavior is destructive and hurtful, and we spend a lot of time with them, we may get hurt. We are in control of our lives but repeated exposure to negative behavior over time may affect us. We deserve to be happy and live with the least amount of complication. We can associate with whomever we choose, but it’s wise to be careful about their influence over us.

Relationships are important and we all want strong, healthy, and happy ones. If we have someone in our lives who belittles us, ridicules us or makes us feel small or unworthy, their comments and actions may have a negative impact on us. If we’ve been in the relationship for a long time it may be hard to find a way out. But we are important and we deserve to be treated well. If we’re struggling with a family member we value but who treats us this way, we can limit our time with them. We don’t have to sever all our ties but we can lessen our exposure. We don’t have to do anything that is uncomfortable for us and we can take care of ourselves and minimize offensive interactions. We can determine how much time negative influences may have in our lives, and we can limit it so we’re comfortable and do what’s best for us.

If we have friends who make decisions and choices we find difficult, we don’t have to participate. We never have to go along just because someone wants us to, and we always have the right to say no. We can be polite and gracious, but if we’re uncomfortable with any situation we can opt out. We don’t have to go anywhere we don’t want to go, or do anything we don’t want to do. Our lives are ours to design and direct. If we have friends who do things that make us uncomfortable, we can tell them how we feel and explain our boundaries. If they can accept our choices, we may continue the relationship. If they can’t accept them, we may do other things. We can change anything we need to ensure we’re happy with what we’re doing and where we’re going.

Today if you’re in a situation that is making you uncomfortable, if someone near you is including you in a decision that doesn’t feel right or is criticizing you and making you feel bad, you may step away. You deserve the life that makes you happiest. You know what feels right. Determine what works for you and follow that. You deserve every blessing. Today let yourself have them.

Sand

28 Jun

If you’ve ever been to the beach and played in the sand for any length of time you know how insidious it can be. The shore is covered with sand and as we walk on it, play in it and swim around it we get it in our swimsuits, in our shorts, in our shoes, in our hair and everywhere else. But we’re having fun and although it can be annoying and gritty to deal with, it’s worth the trade-off. In our lives there are lots of people around us all the time. Though not as numerous as sand particles on the beach, there are many continually in and out of our lives. If we surround ourselves with good, strong people our associations may be beneficial and helpful. But if we continually interact with others whose choices aren’t positive, and who do things that bring problems and heartache to those around them, our time with them may hurt us. Like the sand that finds its way all over us and then begins to chafe, if we continually associate with those who hurt us we will be unhappy.

We build and create our relationships for lots of reasons. Sometimes they evolve because of association, sometimes they are part of our family, sometimes we build them because we like what they bring us, and sometimes we’re in them because there is history that cannot be undone. And sometimes our relationships change and become difficult to navigate. We don’t have to keep any relationship that makes us uncomfortable or that brings us hardship but it can be hard to stop a pattern if we’ve been involved for a long period of time. We might try to distance ourselves from a toxic situation but if we don’t sever the ties that hold us to it, that will do little to fix the problem. It’s like brushing sand off the outside of our bathing suit but doing nothing to wash out the grit that has made its way inside it. Things may look better on the outside, but the problem is still there. No matter who we’re involved with, and no matter what their relationship is to us if we are not happy, we can change it.

If we stay in relationships that hurt us and do nothing to change them, our unhappiness may increase. No matter what the situation is we always have the power to modify our circumstances so we can move forward comfortably and happily. If we’re dealing with someone who is rude and offensive, we can speak up and clearly state our boundaries. If we have a difficult family member we can set the example for patience and insist on being treated with respect. If we’re in a relationship that isn’t working and we want to move on we can do what is needed to make that happen. There isn’t anything we can’t manage and if we’ve got sand in our shoes, we can shake it out. If it’s in our hair, we can wash it out. And if it’s in our clothes, we can change them. Our lives belong to us and we can do whatever is needed to be happy and successful.

Today if you’re in a situation that is making you uncomfortable, be honest and do what is needed to change it. You deserve to be happy. Take charge and change your course. Shake out the sand and enjoy the beach. You have everything it takes to move forward.

Finding Ourselves

16 May

Learning who we are and what we want seems like an easy thing to do.  After all, we’re the only ones living inside our own heads.  But the complications of living in a world filled with others and their opinions and expectations, can muddy the waters.  We learn as we go and each day we discover something new about ourselves.  As we grow, we change and how we see ourselves changes as well.  They say it isn’t until we’re lost that we begin to find ourselves.  When we get lost and all the things we thought we could count on aren’t available, if our direction is spinning around and we feel untethered, we have only ourselves to rely on.  And when that happens, we learn who we really are.  When it’s just us and nobody else, when the light is dim and it’s hard to find our way, we must pull from resources inside us.  And when we do we find out how strong and capable we are, and we begin to understand how much we can really do.  Discovering who we really are and living a genuine life are great blessings that will bring us comfort, courage, and confidence.

This life is filled with signs and directions.  Go here, go there, do this, do that, stop, go, wait, it’s endless.  Everyone has an opinion about what we should do.  Some of those opinions mean a lot, and some of it is just noise created by our societal norms.  If we take a road trip and follow every sign we see, take every exit and every turn, all we’ll do is drive from place to place with no final destination.  Our lives are the same way.  If we don’t have a plan for our destination, if we don’t know what we want to do, and if we have no idea where we’re headed, we’ll end up spending our days going places but landing nowhere.

We don’t always have to get lost to figure out who we are and what we want, but we will have to pay attention.  Instead of going along with everything we encounter, we can take a moment and decide if it’s something we really want to do.  Instead of acting a certain way because it’s what’s expected, we can be genuinely who we are.  Our lives are in our control.  We can decide to do anything with them we choose.  But we have to make the choices if we want them to be ours.  We can go anywhere we want to go, but we have to take the journey.  We can be anything we want to be, but we have to do what’s needed for that to become reality.  It’s all in our power.  The only thing stopping us from doing it our way, is us.  We have sufficient courage and determination to create the lives we want.  Our lives can be a true reflection of who we are, and when they are, we find real happiness.

Today if you feel like you’re not moving forward the way you want to and you’re staying busy but feel stuck, think about what you want.  Think about who you really are and then begin to live your life the way that fits you best.  You are a gift to the world.  There has never been, nor will there ever be anyone else like you.  Be genuine.  Be yourself and share that uniqueness.  The world is better because you’re here.  Find yourself and you’ll find real happiness.