Popping the Balloon

5 Oct

Confidence is something we all want. For some of us it comes easily. We feel strongly about our abilities and our self-worth, and are naturally confident in what we do and what we say. For others it’s not that easy. We may have scars from people putting us down or criticizing us, or we may feel we are unworthy in some way or another. When confidence comes easily it may seem second nature to us, but if we have to work at it sometimes it’s hard to achieve. If we’re trying hard to feel stronger about ourselves and doing things to build our confidence, it helps to have the support of those around us. But if someone close to us jabs us with a critical comment or says something derogatory, it may stop us in our tracks and send us spiraling downward again. Like popping a balloon, all the air rushes out of our progress and we feel deflated, and lost. But we aren’t balloons, and even though someone is rude or critical, we don’t have to believe what they say. We can let their comments bounce off us, and continue on our journey.

Sometimes a lack of confidence comes from a feeling of not fitting in. There are certain norms in every avenue of our lives. When most people do something a certain way, it becomes the norm. But fitting the norm just means we’re like a lot of other people. If we’re living our lives differently according to our personal desires, and we don’t match up with what’s expected, we’re being individuals. We don’t have to fit anybody’s idea of what we should be. We are entitled to be who we are, even if that’s different from everyone else. Being unique doesn’t diminish our value. Being different doesn’t make us less, but sometimes we can feel that way. It’s important to embrace the person we really are. There are many different colors in the world. Every one of them is unique and every one is beautiful in its own way. We’re the same. We are beautiful and worthwhile just as we are.

Building a more confident feeling of self-worth is a process. We can start by focusing on things we already do well. Maybe we can draw beautiful pictures, maybe we play an instrument, maybe we have an amazing vocabulary, or maybe we’re really good at listening. Everyone has something they do well, and once we identify what ours is, it will build us up as we move along.  If others don’t understand us, that’s okay. We’re all unique and get to design our lives to fit our personal desires. Some people won’t get us, some people won’t agree with what we’re doing, and some people won’t enjoy us as much as we might like. But no matter what others think, we may choose to live our lives any way we see fit.  We can do things our way and we can be confident.  Our way is the best way for us.

Today if you’re feeling like you’re not quite good enough, or like you don’t fit in, remember you are unique and special.  You do a lot of things well. Don’t compare yourself to what someone else thinks you should be. Be exactly who you really are. You have a lot to offer, and you have a lot to share. You are wonderful just as you are. You can do anything, and you don’t need anyone’s approval to succeed.

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