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Bending

17 Jul

Patience is a beneficial virtue to acquire. If we learn to be patient, we can often understand things more easily, and prevent conflict by listening, and waiting for answers instead of pushing. Being patient is a gift to those we interact with. When we’re patient, others learn they can trust us to listen, and not jump to conclusions ahead of time. Although this is a valuable skill, is it possible to be too patient? Can we give too much? Can we wait too long?

When we’re in a relationship we value, and things aren’t going the way we want them to, we may discuss the issue with the other person, tell them why we aren’t happy, and ask for a change. If they are not ready, they may need time. If we’re patient, we may offer that time in order to preserve the relationship. Sometimes with communication and effort, things improve, and the problems work themselves out. But other times, despite our willingness to wait, things stay the same. Patience will not create change. It only allows time for change to happen. If the situation doesn’t improve after a time, we have to decide if we can wait a little longer, or if we need to move on.

It is possible to bend too far in trying to make something work. If we find the wait is beginning to affect our happiness, we need to rethink the situation. We offer patience to help situations improve, but if nothing changes all the patience in the world will not help. If we bend too far, and give too much, we may find ourselves in a very uncomfortable place.

Today if you’ve been patiently waiting for a situation to change and it’s not happening, re-evaluate your options. Determine how long you feel comfortable waiting, and when you get there if nothing has improved, move on. Patience is a noble attribute, and it’s good to exercise it. But don’t bend so far that you’re miserable. Sometimes even the best changes don’t come. Sometimes we have to let it go, and move on. Today think about that. The situation may be important, but you’re important too. Be patient, and be kind, but remember your happiness is valuable. Do what you need to ensure it.

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