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Intertwined

4 Mar

We can do just about anything we want to in our lives. If we want to learn something new, with enough time and practice we can master whatever it is. If we want to make a change, with enough determination we can accomplish it. And if we want to achieve something, if we plan well and do all we can, we can succeed. Unfortunately we all face times when something we really want eludes us.  If everything only depended on us we might never fail, but in this life what we do and what we want often depends on the choices of others. We can try hard to change something in our lives but if others are involved and they don’t agree, we may have to alter our course for a time.  Sometimes we may have to change our plans until the situation improves. But that doesn’t mean we have to forsake the dream. It just means we may have to move in a different direction or at a different pace.

The old saying that “no man is an island” is true. We live in a world with lots of other people. We develop all kinds of relationships with them and they are intertwined throughout our lives. There are some things we do that don’t impact anyone else, but unless we’re hermits living alone on a mountain top, many of our choices will touch those around us in some way. If we’re in a work situation, the choices we make and the things we want to achieve may depend on their agreement and support. If we’re dealing with family and they don’t understand what we’re trying to do, their disapproval may hinder us. If we’re in a relationship where someone depends on us keeping things the same, we may postpone a decision we really want to make. People are complicated and every one of us has our own unique perspective on life. If we want to do something that needs the cooperation of those near us for it to succeed, and that isn’t forthcoming, we can alter our plans. We can find a way to move forward alone, and we can still succeed.

Complications often come when we’re trying to make a change in our lives. But complications are just unexpected developments. We are certainly capable of figuring out how to navigate anything that comes our way, and if our goal is important to us we will find a way around any complication. If we want something badly enough we can achieve it even without the support of those around us. Someone else’s opinion of what we’re doing is just that – their opinion. And their opinion belongs to them. We can let them own that, and continue on our course.  We can listen to their comments and if we don’t agree, we can graciously decline their advice and do what’s most important to us.

Today if you really want to make a change in your life, and there’s something you want to do, carefully weigh your options. If you can move forward and feel it’s best to proceed, begin today. If you feel you must wait until things change, make a plan for when you will start. There isn’t anything you can’t do. You’re in charge of your life and are capable of making excellent decisions. You know what you want and you know how to get it. Make a plan and make the best choices for success.

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It Happens

25 Feb

We live at a time of unprecedented opportunity. We can travel around the world, take jobs we can work at home, go to college in our spare time, and accomplish anything we set out to do. It has never been easier to make dreams come true. But the trick is learning how to make them happen. We have a choice in our lives – we can either make things happen by setting goals and working toward them, or we can sit back and let them happen as they will and navigate around them. Life changes every moment of every day. Whether the changes are things we want to experience or not often depends on the choices we make. There are some things we have no control over, but when it comes to our lives, we can determine and change a lot. All we really have to do is decide what we want. After that we can work toward our goals and if we are persistent will make many of them a reality. Some people don’t want the responsibility of creating the lives they dream of and prefer to just go along with whatever comes their way. Perhaps they prefer the security of knowing someone else will decide, or the comfort of sameness each day. But if we let circumstances and others determine where our lives will go, it’s doubtful we’ll find real, fulfilling happiness. And we all deserve to be happy.

It’s those who dream of changing things and imagining how different life could be who make the most amazing discoveries. If Edison had not imagined we could have light whenever we wanted it, he wouldn’t have created the light bulb. Dreamers have enhanced our lives in many ways. It’s wonderful to dream and imagine what could be. But in every instance if we want to create something new, change something, or develop our lives in new ways, we have to do more than dream. We have to act. If all Edison did was sit around and think about how wonderful it would be to have light at the flick of a switch, and did nothing to make it happen, he would have created nothing. Even if we spend years planning a dream we want to achieve, even if we ponder every detail we need to conquer to make it happen, until we actually begin to do what is needed to make it a reality, nothing will change. Our lives will continue, time will go by, and we’ll still be dreaming.

There isn’t anything we can’t do. If we can think it, we can do it. Some things will of course be harder than others, but with sufficient preparation and time, if we work at them and persist no matter what comes, we can make our dreams a reality. It takes courage to change our lives and go after the things we dream about. It takes determination and it might take a long time. But we have enough courage and determination if we really want what we’re dreaming of, and we can move forward toward it for however long it takes to succeed. We are capable of having the lives we dream about. Our lives will go by whether we design them and create them the way we want them or not. We are responsible for the choices we make, even when we choose to do nothing. We deserve to be happy. We deserve to make all our dreams come true. Life happens. It’s up to us to make sure it happens our way.

Today if you’ve been dreaming of something you really want to do but haven’t done anything to achieve it, take the first step. Mark your path and move forward a little every day. As you move closer to the goal your confidence will rise and you’ll succeed. Nothing is strong enough to stop you. You can make all your dreams come true. Make your life happen your way, and it will be the life you always dreamed of.

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Next

6 Feb

Everything we do has an affect on something. Every decision we make takes us somewhere and every choice has a result. If we’re paying attention we can see where we’re going and if we stay on a certain road, where we’ll end up. But that attention can be distracted if we’re involved with someone we really like, or the road is very beautiful, or the promised destination is something we truly want. Distraction can make us oblivious to certain clues and cues, and we might find we end up somewhere that isn’t anything like the destination we thought we were traveling to. They say hindsight is 20-20 and that’s true, but it’s only true because we can’t possibly know what we don’t know. In the end it’s easy to see all the missed steps because we have more information. However, if we’re alert and allow ourselves to see things as they really are as we travel forward, we’ll be able to make better choices. People who want us to do things their way, or go where they think we should go may convince us by making things seem different than they really are. It may not be malicious, and they may think they know what’s best for us. But we know better than anyone where we should be, and if we look carefully, we’ll find our way there.

Every choice we make will bring us a result, either good or bad. Sometimes they are the results we’re seeking, and sometimes we have to try again. There are a lot of roads we can take, and some are very attractive. If we aren’t careful we may follow them without looking at where they will ultimately lead. For instance, if we meet someone we feel very attracted to we may plunge ahead without a second thought. They may seem to be everything we’ve been looking for, but as time passes we notice they don’t always follow through on what they say, and although they seem very sincere, they continually break their promises. If we get caught up in their charisma, and the charming promise of who they say they are, we may miss these important cues for a time. But in the end, truth always surfaces and if they are dishonest and insincere, eventually we’ll see it. If we’re very invested in the relationship when the truth comes out, it will be painful to redirect our course. It’s much easier to be willing to see everything openly at the beginning and make a positive decision starting out, than it is to fix a situation after problems are evident.

B always follows A. If we look at situations with a broad view and see where they’re headed, and allow ourselves to be objective instead of getting caught up in the image of what might be, we will better direct our course. We’ve all been swept away, and sometimes it doesn’t work out the way we thought it would. When someone wants something from us – our time, our effort, our affection, our love – they may paint the palette with the exact colors we need to see to follow along. We can be entranced, enchanted, and mesmerized, and if we are, we won’t see the situation objectively. But we can remember that B always follows A. One thing always leads to another, and if we pay attention we can see where we’re headed. We have the power to objectively and wisely make any decision, even one that is framed in illusion and promise. We can step back, clear away any curtains of influence, and see the whole situation objectively. Being proactive at the beginning will help us to go forward confidently and wisely.

Today if the road you’ve been on isn’t going where you thought it would, you can change your course. You are capable of making excellent decisions and if you need to change something, you can. Nobody’s life follows a perfectly straight line. Every detour teaches us something. You know where you want to go. Do what you need to get there. You’re in control. You can change direction and you will be successful.

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Stuck

5 Feb

We have all kinds of options and opportunities in our lives. There are limitless choices we can make. We can do anything we want to do, go anywhere we want to go, and spend our time with anyone we choose. We can exercise our options at any time and change our situation whenever we feel we need to. But sometimes we forget we have the power to do these things, and we get stuck. Maybe we’re in a relationship that has been a part of our lives for a long time and although we aren’t happy, it has become routine, and we aren’t sure how to break free.  Maybe it’s a career we fell into that isn’t fulfilling but changing to something new is unsettling so we soldier on. And maybe it’s just a lifestyle we formed when we were younger that no longer fits who we are, but we aren’t sure how to change it. We get stuck in routines, in expectations, and in responsibilities. We can forget that we’re in control of our lives but if we want to be happy, really happy, we can do whatever it takes to get there. We can change anything even if it’s been a part of our lives for years. We deserve to be completely happy and feel we’re in charge of our future. We can do anything, but first we have to recognize where we are and decide if it’s where we want to be.

There is no pre-recorded path for our lives. Some people believe in fate and that we are destined to travel a certain road, but that flies in the face of reason. If we were all fated, we wouldn’t be able to choose our own way, but we can do that. If we’re lazy or uncertain, and unhappy where we are, we can say it’s fate, but in reality it’s a choice we’re making. We aren’t puppets on a string, and there isn’t anyone pulling those strings to make us go one way or another. Everything we do is a choice we make. There are sometimes pressures on us to go a certain way and make certain decisions, but in the end we are the ones who choose. Nobody can really make us do anything. And so, if we feel unsatisfied or unfulfilled, we can choose to change our lives. We can choose to do it at any time. And if we’re unhappy the sooner we decide to change, the more content we’ll be.

Nobody knows how long we’ll be on earth in this amazing, precarious, unpredictable, and wonderful existence. We may live to be centenarians, or we may leave earlier. We need to make the most of every day we’re here and get the most out of our experiences. If we’re stuck in a situation that stunts us, keeps us from moving forward, or doesn’t make us happy, we can change it. We deserve to be happy and feel we’re taking advantage of every opportunity available to us. Routines are just patterns we can break. We don’t have to stay stuck. We can choose something new. We can try anything and we can make our dreams a reality. All we have to do is decide. Making the decision to change is often the hardest part of the process. Once we’ve decided, going forward where we want to go will be rewarding. There isn’t anything we can’t do if we want it badly enough. We can conquer any obstacle, and we can accomplish whatever we set out to do. Getting stuck happens. Getting unstuck can happen too.

Today if you feel you’ve been stuck in a situation that isn’t rewarding or fulfilling and you want to change, you can. Decide what you want to do and where you want to go, and then open the door and begin. There isn’t anything you can’t do. Make your dreams come true. You have everything you need already. Take the first step. Turn the page. Happiness is there waiting for you.

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Easy Way Out

2 Feb

Life is complicated and sometimes we find ourselves in situations that aren’t working for us and we want to change. We’re in charge of our lives and can change anything we wish, but it isn’t always easy. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable to make changes, especially when others are involved. For instance, if we’re in a relationship that isn’t working and we no longer want to continue. The best we can do is to be honest and upfront, and tell the other person how we feel and that we want to move on in another direction. But sometimes we may think that’s too difficult, so instead we dodge them, stand them up for dates we’ve made, or don’t answer their calls. If we do that, we figure eventually they’ll get the idea and we’ll have made our exit without the uncomfortable conversation. We might think that’s the easy way out, but really it’s just the coward’s way out, and we can all do better than that. In most situations when we need to make a definite change, there really is no easy way out. If we want to handle it well, we have to be courageous and honest enough to state our feelings clearly, and then move forward on a new road.

Nobody wants to hurt others. We don’t want to make people feel bad, and we never want to be the bad guy. But if we need a change, and if we aren’t honest about it we have only two other options. We can continue to pretend that everything is fine, which never works over time, or we can try to find an easy way out, which often hurts everyone more in the end. We all have sufficient courage to stand up for what is right, and be honest. If the situation has been going on for a long time it will be harder than if it’s been a brief interchange. But long or short, if it has to change, we need to be open enough to make that happen. If we clearly, and openly express our feelings and explain what we want going forward, the other person may be hurt, but they will respect our honesty. They may not like what we have to say, but they will understand our decision.

Many of us are resistant to change. When things stay the same we know what to expect and that makes us comfortable. But we deserve to be happy, and if we aren’t happy with the way our lives are going we can make whatever changes are needed to bring happiness to us. It may be uncomfortable to initiate the change, and feel awkward at first while we set up new patterns, and decide on a new course, but if the end result is personal happiness, it’s worth whatever it takes. Change is a normal part of life. We all experience it every day. Life is fluid and the only thing we can really count on is that whatever we’re going through today will change at some point. If we decide we need to, we can make that change come sooner rather than later. This life is a gift. We only get one chance to live each day. It’s not worth wasting a single moment in a situation that makes us unhappy. We are in control of our lives and we can design them any way we want to. We have all the courage we need to correct any situation we’re in.

Today if you’re unhappy with a situation in your life, you can change it. Be honest and open about how you feel and what you want going forward. Asking for what you want doesn’t make you the bad guy. You deserve every happiness. Your life is precious. Don’t waste another moment being unhappy. Change what needs to be changed, and you’ll find the peace and comfort you deserve.

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