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Defining

31 Jul

People come in and out of our lives constantly. Sometimes we make connections that last only a brief time, and sometimes we have lifelong relationships. No matter how many attributes we may share, we are all unique and define our lives by the choices we make. When we care about someone, their influence over us may be great. We want to make them happy so there may be times when we agree to do something we don’t really want to do. That may not be a problem for inconsequential decisions – where to have dinner, what movie to see, or what to do over the weekend. However, if they want us to do things that impact our lives negatively, or change our direction toward something we don’t want, and we go along, we may end up somewhere we never wanted to go. It’s not always easy to stand up for our own decisions when someone we love is pressuring us to go along with theirs. We can always agree to anything and do what everyone else thinks we should, leaving our personal choices behind. But it’s important to remember that when we choose the first step on a path, we are also choosing the last. If we go along with someone else’s decision in the beginning, we will end up at the destination they’ve chosen. Our lives are important and how we define them is up to us. We can have the lives we want the most, but we must make the decisions necessary to achieve them. Nobody will ever know more about what’s important to us than we do. We can choose our own roads to travel. If everyone agrees it may be easier, but even if they don’t, we can move forward with confidence toward any destination we desire. Our lives are ours to design and nothing is out of reach. Each step we take can move us closer to the lives we dream about.

Everyone has opinions about everything. Someone may think they have better ideas about how we should live than we do, and share them with us. They may say anything they like, but we never have to take any advice we don’t want. We can listen patiently and thank them for their input, and then choose our own way forward. There is no one perfect way to live life. We can do things our way, and go to the destinations we most desire. Expressing our own individuality and making our own choices will bring us great reward and satisfaction.

When we’re young we learn a lot about life from our families. The patterns we grow up with are comfortable and familiar. As we become adults, we may choose to adopt those same patterns in our lives, or we may decide to go another way. We don’t have to keep doing something just because we’ve done it that way in the past. There are unlimited versions and variety to every experience. If we want to change something, we can. Our lives can represent who we are individually, and sharing our unique gifts will bring richness and variation to the world around us.

Today if you’ve been going along with those you care about and letting go of what you want the most, remember your influence is valuable. Define your life by making choices that express your individuality. Show us who you are. You bring richness and goodness to the world. We’re all blessed because you are here.

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