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Defining the Deal

12 Jul

Every single person on earth is different. There are all kinds of personalities and temperaments, endless expressions and ideas, and no two people are exactly alike. What one loves, another despises, what brings pleasure to one, brings frustration to another. We may believe our interpretations are right but actually they are only right for us. When we’re growing up in our first family, the patterns and traditions we learn seem to be the only way to live. But as we grow and are exposed to the world we learn that everyone has their own ideas about how life works and what they do. When we must face an extreme difficulty and are having trouble finding our way it may be a big deal for us to process. We may struggle to find our footing and reach out to those around us for advice and help. Someone may look at our situation and feel it’s ridiculous and our worries are unfounded. Perhaps what we’re going through seems insignificant, and it might be if it happened to them. But it’s not happening to them, it’s happening to us and everybody’s life experience is different. What’s meaningless to one may be crucial to another. We are the only ones who know how important any issue is to us. We are the ones who define the deal and decide if it’s important and far reaching or something less we can manage and move on. It doesn’t matter if everyone around us sees things differently, we can define any issue in ways that make sense to us and find our way through.

When we’re struggling it doesn’t help to have someone diminish our feelings. Telling us we shouldn’t feel one way or another is futile and ineffective. Our feelings often come unbidden and may be intense and painful. While we may not always be able to control how we feel we can control what we do. We can listen to whatever advice we deem helpful, learn as much as possible about the situation and then decide how to move forward. We have all the intelligence and wisdom we need to figure out any issue and find the answers we need.

When we’re facing a big decision or our situation is fraught with complications and it’s hard to see the way ahead, doubts may creep in and we may find it hard to move forward. When there are a lot of things going wrong we may get jumbled up in the noise and confusion and struggle to figure out what to do. We never have to solve everything all at once. We need only look at where we want to begin. Every problem has a solution and even if it’s a big deal and very complex we can solve it. We are smart enough and strong enough to do anything.

Today if you’re facing a big challenge and feel daunted and unsure, decide on the first step you want to take. You don’t have to find all the answers today. Simply determine how to begin and take the first step forward. The solutions are there and with patience and diligence you will find them all. You are amazing and nothing is too difficult for you. Be confident. You know what you want and you will prevail.

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