Tag Archives: Respect

Without Exception

26 Oct

There are few absolutes in life. No matter where we are or what we’re doing there will always be a lot of variables and differences. Even if we stay in the same place and do the same things, our experiences will never be exactly the same. There are endless things that affect every decision and every move we make. We can’t control what others do or what goes on in the world, but we always have control over ourselves. Our choices belong solely to us. If we are careless and haphazard, and don’t pay attention to the cues and situations around us, odds are we’ll have some unpredictable and uncomfortable experiences. Who we are is defined by what we do, and we can set any standards we like for our own behavior. For instance, we may determine that we will never break the law, rob a bank, kill someone or cheat on our taxes. Those are big problems that would likely bring intensely unpleasant ramifications. But what about the choices that aren’t so extreme. If we want to be honest, will we decide that no matter what, without exception we will always be honest in all our dealings? It sounds straightforward enough, but life is complex and there are lots of situations around us that may make that decision more difficult than we imagine. How will we handle it if we discover we were given too much change at the store, or the checker only charges us for one mango when in fact there were two, or we have the chance to sneak into a theater or concert without paying or being seen? We may excuse these as small and insignificant, but there is no sliding scale for honesty. How we interpret that is up to us. We may do whatever we like, but at the end of the day, our lives will be a reflection of the choices we make. We know what we want and how we want to live our lives. By being true to the standards we set for ourselves, we will find great satisfaction and happiness. There isn’t anything we can’t do once we decide. Every choice is possible and with wisdom and clarity, we can choose the roads that take us where we most want to go.

Peer pressure isn’t just limited to our teen years. Wherever there are others around us we may experience pressure to be like something or do something. Everyone has their own ideas about how things should go and their own interpretation of what is acceptable. We may be pressed to follow the group even if we disagree, but we never have to do anything we don’t want to do. If we’re uncomfortable we can step back and go in a different direction. Those who respect us will honor our decisions. Our lives are ours to design, and we can do anything we like.

As time passes, cultures change, but no matter what those changes are, truth will always remain. The influences around us may be great, but we can take our time and evaluate what is happening and where it will lead. We are strong enough and smart enough to find the best way forward. We don’t have to follow the crowd to reach success. It is there, waiting for us to make the choices that will take us to it.

Today decide what kind of life you want to lead and determine where you want to go. Look at every option before you and choose the road that will take you to the goal. You have everything you need to achieve great success. Trust yourself and be true. Every destination is there for you, and you will reach them all.

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Not Biting

21 Sep

There are all kinds of people in the world and we’ll have all kinds of interactions with them. Most of the time things will go just fine, we’ll communicate and get along without issue and move on. But everyone is different and some people have very defined ideas about how things should go that may be completely different from our own viewpoint. They may demand that we respond or do something they want, and may apply serious pressure to get us to go along. They may even give us a mandatory time frame to respond or act by. People can make any demands they like, but we are in control of our own lives. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks we should do, we can make our own decisions. Just because the issue is imperative to them does not make it imperative to us. We never have to do anything we don’t want to do. The influence of others is only as powerful as we allow it to be and we have the right to live our lives according to our own desires and standards. While some people may think they’re in control of those around them, and do everything they can to press their views, we never have to take the bait. By not biting, and simply continuing forward according to our own desires and priorities, we can move through any difficult situation. We can be respectful and decline any suggestions offered. Our lives are ours to design, and when we are true to who we are and what we want, will find great satisfaction. We know who we are and where we want to go. We can set our own course and continue forward toward success.

Some people want everyone on the same page, agreeing and following along. They like conformity and are uncomfortable when others have different ideas they do not share. While it’s true that it’s often easier to move forward when others are involved if everyone stays within the lines set forth, we all have unique perspectives that are valuable and worthwhile. Sameness can only bring sameness. Different viewpoints and opinions bring depth and richness to every situation. Listening to everyone’s point of view will open new doors and enlighten the way forward.

If we want to make cookies, we must pull together many different kinds of ingredients. It’s impossible to make something delicious with just one item. A bowl full of flour is just a bowl full of flour. But if we add sugar, salt, eggs, chocolate chips and other ingredients, we end up with something wonderful. Our lives are the same way. By allowing all kinds of opinions and ideas and being open to new ways of doing things, we embellish the road ahead and enrich our experiences.

Today if someone is demanding that you do something their way and you have other ideas, be patient and polite, and then chart your own way forward. You are amazing and intelligent, and know what you want. Stand strong and step forward with clarity and purpose. Every destination is there for you and nothing can keep you from success.

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Different Color

15 Aug

It’s easy to be around people who are like us.  If they have similar values, see the world in basically the same way we do and share our views of what’s right and wrong, it’s easy to be around them and share our lives with them.  But everyone is different and even if we’re sure our way of thinking is best for us, it’s foolish to believe it’s the way everyone else should live.  There are endless ideas and expressions possible and we all form our own views based on what we’ve experienced and what we want to gain.  What’s important to us may mean nothing to someone else.  It doesn’t mean either is wrong.  It’s just a difference in interpretation.  If we draw a hard line in the sand and require others to be like us in order to have a relationship with us, we may have a very lonely life.  We all have some things in common – we’re human beings, our basic needs are the same and we’re sharing the earth at the same time.  Other differences don’t change those parameters.  A horse of a different color is still a horse after all.  But everything else for us may be different than those around us and that’s fine.  We are unique and our expressions and desires are specific to our personal experience.  As long as nobody is getting hurt, allowing others to express themselves according to their own wishes is wise.  We may not understand their viewpoint but we can respect their right to it and honor their choices.  We don’t have to do anything that isn’t right for us and can follow our own specific paths.  As we do we can walk beside others who are taking a different road and create friendships despite the difference.

Hatred is a caustic emotion.  It never brings peace or anything of value to us.  Hating others because they are different than we are will never bring us happiness.  Even if we have no understanding of why someone would choose something we can understand and accept their right to make the decision.  We don’t have to agree or support anything that is contrary to our personal values but we can’t impose our beliefs on others.  We all have the right to live our lives any way we choose.  Respecting that right will help us clarify where we stand and define the paths we want to take.

Our personal experiences are unique to us.  Nobody is living our lives but us and nobody else is privy to the insight and understanding we gain as we go through different passages.  We can be confident in our choices and sure of our decisions.  It doesn’t matter if everyone else is going left, we can turn right if it’s right for where we are.  There are limitless roads to travel and the ones we choose are up to us.  We are unique and perfect in our own way.  Honoring that uniqueness in ourselves and others will bring us true and complete happiness.

Today if you’re confused about the decisions made by others around you, remember you only have insight into your own life.  Your experiences are unique to you and you can make any choices you like.  Honor the same in others and your life will be enriched.  We’re all different.  You are perfect in your own way.  Be welcoming to others and show the world your best.

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Facing It

28 Jul

We all have times when we must do something we truly do not want to do.  It may be unpleasant, frightening, stressful, or difficult and we may feel we can’t go through it.  We might be able to find our way around some things we don’t want to do but there will be others we’ll have to walk through and manage.  If they involve other people who have been mean to us or manipulated us in ways that are infuriating or painful the idea of having to deal with them may be repugnant and overwhelming.  We may think we can’t do it, and even if we could, we definitely don’t want to do it.  It’s hard to look at very difficult situations in front of us and feel comfortable but nobody gets a life filled with only flowers and butterflies.  We all have to face the fire from time to time.  Holding our confidence close and determining to do whatever is needed to move forward will help us navigate any complication we must face.  No matter what lies ahead we have everything we need to manage it and we can be strong through any turmoil or trouble.  Life can be tumultuous but we can work through anything that stands in our way and do what is needed to restore harmony.  It’s not comfortable to do things that are difficult but comfort will come on the other side.  We are powerful and capable and we can face anything and overcome.  There is nothing too difficult or complicated for us to figure out and we have all the strength and courage we need to do what is required to move through any problem we’re facing.

Everyone has their own ideas about how things should go and how relationships should work.  If we have a relationship that brings us pain but is valuable to us we will have to weigh our options carefully going forward.  We never need to stay in any relationship that is detrimental to us.  We can choose our own way and determine how we will live our lives.  We deserve to be happy and respected and we can find ways to manage our relationships that allow us to feel comfortable and confident going forward.  Just because we’ve done something one way in the past doesn’t mean we must continue doing it if we aren’t happy.  We can always modify our course and choose what is best for us.

If we must face a situation that is daunting and we feel threatened trying to find a way through we can trust in our ability to make excellent choices and be confident that we will succeed.  We have already faced many difficult times in the past and have overcome them and continued forward.  There isn’t anything we can’t face and manage well.  We have everything we need to face any complicated or difficult challenge.  We are a blessing to the world and we can be confident that we will prevail.

Today if you’re facing a situation that is overwhelming and you feel unsure about going forward, remember you have everything you need to face anything and prevail.  You are powerful and strong.  There is nothing too difficult or complex for you.  You have everything you need right now to face anything before you.  Be confident.  You will win.

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The Straw

8 Mar

Most of us are pretty resilient. We can endure challenges as they come along and find our way through. We figure out how to go forward when things get hard, and we know what we want to do. Sometimes we get into situations where those around us make us feel uncomfortable. Maybe someone continually insults us or criticizes us, or someone close to us lets us down again and again. We can put up with those things for a time, but eventually we will get to a breaking point. We finally get to that straw, the final straw that breaks the camel’s back. We all have limits, and limits by their very definition have end points. We can endure something for a time, look the other way, and take it, but at some point we will have had enough. When that happens we have to change the situation. Sometimes because we’ve let bad feelings or resentment fester, when we get to the point of no return we may lash out and say things we regret later and make the situation worse. If we can be proactive and change things before that happens we’ll be more successful in changing things. We are all entitled to speak up and state what we don’t want. If we wait, endure in silence, and get pushed too far, we may find ourselves acting in ways that don’t reflect the standards we want to keep.

Some people are rude. Some people are mean, and some people don’t care if they hurt others. We all get to choose what kind of person we want to be and for some those choices are hurtful or demeaning. We’ve all known, or had to interact with, someone who was unkind or abrasive. Every situation is different and if our dealings with them are limited we may choose to endure it and say nothing. But if we must interact with them over a period of time and each time we’re uncomfortable, we can speak up. We don’t have to be rude or unkind. We can patiently and clearly say what is offensive to us and ask them to stop doing it. That may be uncomfortable at first, but often once we’ve stated our feelings, the other person will change their behavior when they are with us. Even if they don’t change, we will have more confidence going forward because we’ve expressed our needs and know they are aware of the situation.

If we wait until the last straw when we can’t stand one more moment of the situation, we may give up our ability to control how we handle it. It’s harder to control our behavior when we’re furious or angry than it is when we’re calm and in control. If we say something the first time we’re offended, we have a better chance of being in control of the situation instead of allowing it to be in control of us. We are entitled to feel comfortable in our dealings with others and we deserve to be treated with respect. If that’s not happening we can politely express our dissatisfaction the first time we feel it. If we clearly state our boundaries and say how we feel we may turn a turbulent relationship around. If we say nothing, our only option is to suffer in silence, which gets us nowhere.

Today if you’ve been insulted or hurt by something someone did or said, talk to them. Tell them how you feel. Just speaking up will empower you. You deserve only the best of everything. When you speak up you have the best chance of getting that. You have so much to offer. Ask for the respect you deserve. You’ll feel better and your confidence will rise.

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