Out of Control

19 Dec

Life can be unexpected and we may sometimes find ourselves in situations that are uncomfortable for us. There may be moments when because of situation or circumstance, someone may try to take control of our lives in ways that are difficult to deal with. If somebody else is more forceful than we are and decisions must be made, they may take command and if we don’t speak up we may end up facing things we don’t want to do. And sometimes we don’t have control over something simply because we are outsiders and decisions were made that affect our lives that we had no way to prevent. We all want to control what we do and where we go and often that’s the case, and if we find ourselves having to do something we didn’t choose it can be difficult to navigate. We are in charge of our lives and we may choose what we do. If we don’t want to participate in a decision, we don’t have to. It may be difficult to decline and refuse if someone close to us is adamant that we join in, but if we don’t want to be a part of the plan we can say no. We know what’s best for us and can make any decision we need to ensure that’s what we get.

Some people want to control a lot in life. In group settings, they like to decide what the group will do, where they will go, and what will happen. They often feel they know more than others and their opinions are the best that can be offered. However, we have control over our lives and may take them anywhere we want to go. But our lives are the only lives we have authority over. It is inappropriate and inconsiderate to believe we know what’s best for others. We may have good suggestions and may certainly offer them, but they are suggestions and not orders. We don’t have the right to tell others how to live their lives. If someone wants control over our decisions, we may politely thank them for their ideas and explain that we will decide what is best for us. We are the only ones who know everything about what we’re doing and where we want to go. We know how to choose the best path forward and although the advice of those we care about may be valued, our decisions belong to us.

In our intimate and close relationships, our loved ones may try to control the paths we’ll take. If we don’t comply they may resort to emotional blackmail and coercion to get their way. No matter what anyone else wants us to do or how much pressure they exert we can still choose what’s best for us. We have the great privilege and responsibility of managing our lives and taking them where we most want to go and we don’t have to do anything we don’t want to do. We drive our own personal trains and we know what tracks we want to travel. We can choose well and reach any destination we desire.

Today if someone has been trying to get you to follow their lead and you are uncomfortable, you may say no. You are capable of choosing the very best paths for your life and you know what you want and need. Be confident in choosing for yourself and forging your own way. You have everything you need to succeed and be happy. You know where you want to go and you will get there.

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